Paneldemonium, Part 7
by Marc Richard
by Marc Richard
An incursion of Time Travel Week
IJD: Zeke, did you manage to follow any of that?
Zeke: You've got to be kidding me.
Kira: Well, it made perfect sense to me.
IJD: It did?
Kira: Sure. Why do you think I'm so worried? Only a lunatic could understand that kind of logic! What does that say about my mental state?
IJD: Uh...maybe it says that you've got a case of temporal psychosis?
Zeke: Temporal what?
IJD: Psychosis. I saw it on a Next Generation episode.
Zeke: I thought it was temporal narcosis.
IJD: Is there a difference?
Kira: There certainly is! "Temporal narcosis" is when you can't stay awake; "temporal psychosis" is when your thoughts are incoherent. They're not at all the same thing!
IJD: Are you sure? What kind of condition is your brain in after you've stayed up late for an all-night pub crawl?
Kira: It's, uh, tired and fuzzy.
IJD: I rest my case.
Marc: Which reminds me...I really must be going. Five minutes ago is coming up very soon.
Zeke: Could you translate that into Latin? I could use a backup motto for my website.
Marc: Sorry, no time. Here, Marc -- take this before I go.
Marc: The tricorder? Why?
Marc: It's what you sent me back for, right? Now that you have it, my mission has been accomplished.
Marc: True...but you asked me to give it to you a couple of minutes ago.
Marc: Yes, but only to make that temporal causality chain work. It wouldn't make sense for me to keep it!
Kira: Do I dare ask why not?
Marc: Because if I already had a tricorder, there wouldn't be any point in my going back in time to get one, right?
Kira: Uh...right. I guess.
Marc: Good enough. See you all a short while ago.
Zeke: You already did!
IJD: Too late -- he's gone.
Kira: Not soon enough for my taste, if you ask me!
Zeke: It's just as well that I didn't ask. Marc....
Marc: He's gone. Weren't you paying attention to what IJD said?
Zeke: I meant you, not the other one!
Marc: Oh. Sorry. Yes?
Zeke: Hand me that tricorder. I want to see if it really works.
Marc: It works all right. I'm just trying to figure out what this strange reading means.
IJD: What strange reading?
Marc: This one right here, see? I don't like the looks of it.
Kira: The looks of what?
Marc: Of this giant glowing purple space-ribbon thingie that's heading straight for the building we're in...if I understand the screen correctly.
IJD: He's right. The little label here says that it's a "temporal reiteration wave."
Zeke: Huh? What in blazes is a temporal reiteration wave? Could it be what's been causing all these temporal anomalies that have been bothering us?
Marc: The ones we were going to blame on subspace? I don't think so -- it looks much too big. And it's the wrong shape and colour too, in my opinion.
IJD: And it also looks like it's going to hit the outside of this building....
IJD: ...well, uh, right about now.
Kira: Oh no! It's coming straight for us! Look out everybod--
(Theme music of some sort.)
Host: Hi, and welcome to the Late Late Early Late Early Show!
(Applause from the audience members, who are robots with hands programmed only to clap.)
Host: Thanks, you're too kind. With us today we have four very special guests....
TO BE CONTINUED...FOREVER
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Comments? Complaints? Contact the author, Marc Richard.
DISCLAIMER: Yes, we know we're breaking a few copyrights. It's okay because we're insane. Which reminds us, cabbages roam freely in the twilight.
All material © 2002, Marc Richard.