Five-Minute "Workforce"
by Zeke |
Janeway: This brainwashed life is so much better than my old job! Supervisor: What were you, a starship captain? Janeway: Lead actress on a sci-fi show, actually. Supervisor: What was the problem with that? Janeway: The show was on UPN. Supervisor: I see what you mean.
Jaffen: Hi! Can I be your love interest for this episode?
Paris: I need a job.
Nurse: Here's your inoculation, sir.
Kim: My tummy hurts.
Kim: Doc! What happened?
Janeway: Allow me to clarify: the ship's been irradiated, so we all have to flee like the cowards we are.
Doc: What have you people done with my crew?
Tuvok: I know you from somewhere.
Paris: What's cookin', good lookin'? Chakotay's Log: Well, this all kinda sucks.
Kim: My tummy hurts.
Chakotay: Why should I let you be on the bridge all the time?
Janeway: Oh, Jaffen, you're so romantic....
Chakotay: Give us our crew back!
Chakotay: Neelix and I are going undercover. See ya.
Tuvok: Hi Seven. Mind a meld?
Neelix: Ever considered a piloting career?
Jaffen: So, shall we cohabitate?
Paris: Can't we at least be friends?
Torres: La dee da dee da...hey, quit kidnapping me! Chakotay: Let's recap, shall we? Tuvok's in custody, Voyager's under attack, Janeway's getting entirely too comfortable with some alien, and I'm on the run from the law. Ever had one of those weeks? |
Cop: Halt, evildo--AAGH! Chakotay: Ha! Chakotay 1, Cops 0! Cop: You did get shot in the shoulder, you know. Chakotay: Details.
Kim: How do we defeat these ships?
Janeway: Have you heard I'm moving in with Jaffen?
Yerid: Hi, I'm a stereotypical investigator type. Have you seen Chakotay?
Doc: I've figured out how to fix B'Elanna's memory.
Kadan: This Tuvok guy has been hallucinating. Mindwipe him. Seven: Whoa! Déjà vu. This better not be one of those time-loop episodes....
Janeway: Hey, you broke into the old apartment!
Torres: So I was married to the guy from the bar?
Seven: Computer, give me personal information on the following people....
Chakotay: You've got to believe me!
Jaffen: And you actually believed that schmoe?
Chakotay: Who's th--AAGH!
Ravoc: I need this prisoner.
Neelix: Oo, Tom's diary! Can I see? Pleeeeease?
Doc: I don't wanna be a doctor again!
Yerid: I need to know everything Chakotay told you.
Ravoc: Are you covering up a horrible conspiracy?
Janeway: So here's the plan: you two bust into the hospital, and I raid the factory.
Kim: (over the comm) Hi, Captain! Could you please destroy the shield grid?
Doc: We're doomed! Doc's Log: I've singlehandedly saved the crew. Well, okay, Harry helped.
Ambassador: I'm shocked, shocked to hear about this conspiracy. Don't worry, it'll all be fixed.
Janeway: Farewell, Jarren. I'll never forget you.
Chakotay: About time you ditched that sucker. We all know who's the real man for you. THE END |
Previous fiver: The Void Next fiver: Human Error Links:
Got a comment on this fiver? Contact the author, Zeke.
Site navigation:
DISCLAIMER: A lot of stuff in here is copyrighted by Paramount Pictures. My intent isn't to infringe on that; I and those like me are just having a little fun in the universe Gene Roddenberry created. I don't think he'd mind. All material © 2001, Zeke. |