by Marc Richard
by Marc Richard
Doctor: This holo-program will help you learn how to interact with others in a social setting without annoying them.|
Seven: Who wrote it?
Doctor: Why, me, of course.
Kim: Captain, sensors show that the nebula up ahead contains unknown substances.
Bridge Crew: AARRRRGGHH!
Janeway: The only way to get through this nebula alive is for us to go into stasis for a month and leave Seven and the Doctor in charge.
Paris: I don't wanna climb into this damn coffin.
Personal log, Seven of Nine: I have been running the ship successfully all by myself for ten days now. It is an efficient process. The situation also allows me to go skipping rope down the corridors whenever I please without fear of discovery.
Doctor: Goooooood morning, One of Two!
Doctor: Here we are! A simulated crew party in a holographic recreation of the Mess Hall!
Computer: Warning. Antimatter containment system has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down.
Doctor: I've discovered the cause of the false alarm. See this gel-pack? It's been damaged by the nebula's radiation.
Doctor: Whew! I made back to Sickbay in the nick of time!
Personal log, Seven of Nine: Last night, I dreamed that I had a dinner date with Commander Chakotay which ended with a mad, passionate kiss. I suspect that the oppressive emptiness of the ship is beginning to affect my mental stability.
Seven: Computer, run diagnostics. How badly have the ship's systems degraded because of the nebular radiation?
Alien: (over the comm) Hi! I'm trying to cross this nebula but my engines need repairs. Can you spare a microfusion chamber?
Alien: How can a former Borg drone endure being all alone on a ship for weeks and weeks? Doesn't it make you hallucinate?
Seven: There is an alien intruder aboard. I was talking to him in the corridor and he suddenly disappeared.
Paris: (disembodied voice) Help me, Seven....
Doctor: Seven, the alien doesn't exist! You're hallucinating! The radiation is damaging your sensory nodes just like it's destroying the rest of the ship's hardware.
Computer: Propulsion systems have lost power. Forward motion has stopped.
Paris: Me? Sleepwalking? I don't believe it.
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DISCLAIMER: A lot of stuff in here is copyrighted by Paramount Pictures. My intent isn't to infringe on that; I and those like me are just having a little fun in the universe Gene Roddenberry created. I don't think he'd mind.
All material © 2001, Marc Richard.