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#1
07-25-2010, 09:25 PM
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July 25: TJI (XAW, Day 9)
Day 9 is Sunday, and that means it's time for This Just In! Today's issue is notable for two reasons: it's the first normal issue of TJI since '06 (since then it's been Briefs and whatnot), and it marks the long-awaited return of IJD GAF. With breaking news straight outta San Diego Comic-Con 2010 -- or was it 1865? -- here's IJD with TJI #51: Abrams' Lincoln shot by Joan Wilkes, booth babe. No ten connection, you say? Take note of the time of "impact". And then be here for Day 10 (which won't take as long as Day 9; this week was my most exhausting math camp ever, and I really had no time for anything else).
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short [03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem. [03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction 
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#2
07-26-2010, 12:05 AM
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Hilarious from start to finish, IJD! The puns were superb. Is Gerardo's Ford a reference to Ford theater?
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"Please, Aslan," said Lucy, "what do you call soon?" "I call all times soon," said Aslan; and instantly he vanished away and Lucy was alone with the Magician.
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#3
07-26-2010, 12:23 AM
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Funny stuff, IJD.
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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#4
07-26-2010, 01:28 AM
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nice job. 
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Any truth is better than indefinite doubt. — Sherlock Holmes "The Adventure of the Yellow Face," Arthur Conan Doyle
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#5
07-26-2010, 01:41 AM
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IJD, there are enough atrocious puns in there that I'm seriously considering flying to California, working out exactly who and where you are and visiting grievous bodily harm upon you with an assortment of novelty inflatable hammers.
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The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them. Last edited by Sa'ar Chasm; 07-26-2010 at 01:44 AM.
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#6
07-26-2010, 01:53 AM
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Duh. Gerald Ford. Never mind.
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"Please, Aslan," said Lucy, "what do you call soon?" "I call all times soon," said Aslan; and instantly he vanished away and Lucy was alone with the Magician.
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#7
07-26-2010, 04:41 AM
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Also ten-jentially related:
-the number of letters in "This Just In" -The number of years since the assassination of Abraham Lincoln (in a roundabout way). Thanks for the comments, one and all!
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YOU READ IT... ...YOU CAN\'T UNREAD IT!
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#8
07-27-2010, 12:32 AM
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Not often that a title of a work is enough to make me laugh.
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Great TJI, IJD.By the way, I like the new member titles, Zeke. Although I suddenly feel a strange urge to insult everyone I know. In alphabetical order. Are you bovvered?
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“Allow me to show you the door!” (Points) “Look. The door. It’s the wooden thing with the knob.” –Pancho, The Asparagus of La Mancha , VeggieTales Candace: (gasp) The square root of 'soon' is 'never'! The Doctor: It was all in the job title: Head of human resources. Lance: This time, it's personnel. To God be the glory. ><>
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#9
07-30-2010, 05:43 PM
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Well that was pretty funny.
Also, red matter, fech.
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Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants
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#10
08-25-2010, 12:18 PM
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Erm, Day 10?
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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#11
08-26-2010, 05:26 AM
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Right, sorry. It's coming. I hit a patch of inertia there.
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short [03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem. [03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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#12
08-26-2010, 02:04 PM
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I live in fear of the atrocious Day Ten/datin' pun you're about to inflict on us.
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The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them.
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#13
08-26-2010, 02:52 PM
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Of course, if you're counting in binary, it's only Day 2...
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Any truth is better than indefinite doubt. — Sherlock Holmes "The Adventure of the Yellow Face," Arthur Conan Doyle
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#14
08-27-2010, 08:29 PM
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You know what they say, there are only two kinds of people in the world... and I'm not either of them.
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Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants
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#15
08-27-2010, 08:44 PM
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Quote:
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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#16
09-13-2010, 07:38 PM
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Cough.
__________________
mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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#17
09-16-2010, 10:46 AM
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<--hands Nate a cough drop
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Any truth is better than indefinite doubt. — Sherlock Holmes "The Adventure of the Yellow Face," Arthur Conan Doyle
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#18
09-16-2010, 09:18 PM
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Cough drops are awful. I prefer hot liquids. Cider and Tang particularly.
__________________
mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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#19
09-16-2010, 10:53 PM
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Fuming sulphuric acid? You'll never have a sore throat again.
(It's hard to feel pain when your pain receptors have dissolved)
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The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them.
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#20
09-16-2010, 11:51 PM
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The Question: Okay, bored now. Good-bye.
Moving on...
__________________
mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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