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Old 07-01-2006, 11:28 PM
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Default July 1

It's 5MD: The Third Anniversary: The Final Chapter! Lots of contributors today....
  • ...starting with the man himself, Derek. Last year, he created a comic adaptation of his "In the Hands of the Prophets" fiver, one of the six season finales with which he launched 5MD. This year he's done the next one. Here's Five-Minute "The Jem'Hadar": The Comic Adaptation.
  • Next up is staffer Sa'ar Chasm with "Rivals." While I was making this update, I discovered that Sa'ar's "Sanctuary" fiver from '04 had gone missing, probably when we changed to PHP. I've restored it now -- might want to read it in case you missed it before.
  • Next is Nate with "Rules of Engagement." I nearly went with his "Hard Time" fiver, but this event has tortured O'Brien enough already.
  • Finally, here's my own contribution: "In the Pale Moonlight," a brilliant episode I've wanted to hit for a while now.
Nine new fivers and a comic -- feels good after all that downtime, no? With that, and a tip of the hat from me to Derek for his third excellent year, this subsite anniversary event concludes. On to the next one!

(Oh, and happy Canada Day.)
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Old 07-01-2006, 11:51 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sisko
Against my better judgment, I agreed to forge ahead.
The Beast and his armies will devour you in a blaze of natty special effects.

(and happy Canada day to you, too.)
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Old 07-02-2006, 01:15 AM
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Quote:
Odo: Pakleds?
Quark: Yeah. I pay all my employees by the IQ point, and even two of these guys cost less than Rom.
Odo: Is that a good idea? They appear to be using power cables to connect an ancient Japanese board game to your replicator.
Pakled: We look to Go to make us things.
Classic

Quote:
Dax: Dammit! I've been trying to load Tetris for the past half hour, but all I can get is my grant reapplication form.
Sisko: Maybe the universe wants you to get some work done.
Ops Crew: (general merriment)
Sisko: No, seriously, this is getting weird. Go investigate. If you really want to play Tetris, you can restack the boxes in the cargo bay.
More classic

Quote:
Bashir: Doesn't this seem a little odd?
O'Brien: What, using the balls to hit a racquet back and forth? Actually, now that you mention it...
Most Classic

Quote:
Martus: Now what do I do?
Odo: You can come with me to a holding cell.
Martus: On what charge? It's not a crime to break the laws of physics.
Odo: It is on my station. Let's go.
Most Classicer

Quote:
Quark: -- return his copy of .
Shouldn't there be abook name before the period?

Quote:
And so I took my first step into darkness....
Sisko: Garak, I need your help. I'll give you whatever it takes.
Garak: Oh, I'm a simple man, Captain. I don't need much. Only... your SOUL!
Sisko: Why do I get the feeling I'll be grimly narrating this later?
More Classicest

Quote:
Worf: It was an easy victory. The Tenth Fleet was distracted by a planet with shiny rings, and by the time the Betazoid leaders were finished discussing their feelings about the Dominion's arrival, the whole planet was conquered.
Sisko: Damn! We've got to turn this war around before... what's all that noise?
Kira: Odo's holding a "So Much For Lwaxana Troi" party.
Worf: He is? I'm so there!
Unfortunately for me and other staters-of-the-obvious, Deanna wasn't visiting. Competition is so tedious.

Quote:
I should have seen it coming. This man was clearly nothing but trouble...
Odo: (over the comm) Odo to Sisko. Quark just got stabbed by one Grathon Tolar.
All right, maybe he had a redeeming quality or two.
Most Classicester

Quote:
Holo-Weyoun: ...at which point the rest of the Romulan fleet will be unable to stop us. What do you think, Damar?
Holo-Damar: DUH. I ARE STOOPID.

Sisko: Garak, are you sure you're the best person to write this script?
Garak: Are you implying that the dialogue is less than true-to-life?
Most Classicestest

Quote:
Vreenak ranted that it's only okay for the Romulans to lie to us, not the other way around. I can't believe we agreed to that clause in the Treaty of Algeron. He took off and the Federation would have been cosmically hosed, but two days later....
Worf: Oh no -- the Dominion just destroyed some Romulan senator's ship!
O'Brien: Worf, that's great news! It may get them on our side!
Worf: Oh, hey, you're right. I hadn't really thought past somebody other than me getting to kill Romulans.
Moster Classicestest

Quote:
(PUNCH)
Garak: You hit me! Picard never hit me!
Sisko: This was your plan all along, wasn't it? You knew the forgery wouldn't fool Vreenak!
Garak: Frankly, I'm amazed it fooled you. Tolar whipped it up in ten minutes in Microsoft HoloDocument. I killed him too, by the way.
Sisko: I can't believe this! How could you betray me?
Garak: You know, there's this old Cardassian parable about a scorpion....
Mostest Classicestest

Yet another set of good fivers. Mr. Leslie would give a look of aprroval without saying anything or reacting visually. Might go bridge-diving, though.
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Old 07-02-2006, 01:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by e of pi
Shouldn't there be a book name before the period?
Fixed. Thanks.
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Old 07-02-2006, 01:40 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke
Fixed. Thanks.
Okay. Glad to help.
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e of pi: Well, so does anyone who posts on 5M.net. It comes from the extra 55 minutes.

We are the BSG. Your resources and injokes wil be added to our own, depleting your fanbase. Resistance is futile. So say we all.
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  #6  
Old 07-02-2006, 04:11 AM
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Cool

Happy Canada Day!

Great comic, Derek, and great fivers, all.

Quote:
Marcus: I predict this partnership will be a profitable one.
Roana: Can I call you Fendor? It's a Bajoran term meaning "One who survives on his wits."
Marcus: Sure, I guess.
Roana: How about Humperdinck?
Marcus: Absolutely not.
*snicker*

Quote:
Sisko: Damn! We've got to turn this war around before... what's all that noise?
Kira: Odo's holding a "So Much For Lwaxana Troi" party.
Worf: He is? I'm so there!
Bahahahahaha!
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Last edited by mudshark; 07-02-2006 at 04:15 AM.
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Old 07-02-2006, 04:19 AM
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Quote:
My dad always says not to waste time worrying. That's easy when your biggest worry is a random inspection by the FSPCA, but I had just gambled the entire Federation on a forgery. Hm, maybe Dad should have been worried about that too. Anyway....
Sisko: Well, Senator? How did --
Vreenak: (holding up the data rod) CONNNNNNNNNNN!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Quote:
It all started with the casualty list. Every Friday I have to post the latest "Sucks To Be These Casualties" notice from Starfleet.
Bashir: It's all because of those green-blooded Romulans!
O'Brien: You said it. If they didn't turn a blind eye and a pointed ear to the Jem'Hadar crossing their territory....
It was then that I reached a decision: whatever it took, I would convince the Romulans to either enter the war or round off their ears.
*snicker*

Quote:
Dax: I demand to see proof!
Sisko: Blast, you're right. How can we prove the Dominion is --
Dax: No, proof that you could take down the guards. What's your THAC0?
D&D reference. I highly approve, especially since it's 2nd Ed.

Quote:
Kira: (over the comm) Sorry to wake you, Captain, but we just got word that Betazed fell to the Dominion.
Sisko: Betazed? I'm going back to sleep. Call me if they get Vulcan.
*znerk*


Quote:
Worf: It was an easy victory. The Tenth Fleet was distracted by a planet with shiny rings, and by the time the Betazoid leaders were finished discussing their feelings about the Dominion's arrival, the whole planet was conquered.
Sisko: Damn! We've got to turn this war around before... what's all that noise?
Kira: Odo's holding a "So Much For Lwaxana Troi" party.
Worf: He is? I'm so there!
I love this scene for some many different reasons.

Quote:
Quark: Sure. Let's talk about all the charges I'm going to press. Man, I'm gonna be pressing charges like an Orion pirate. You couldn't press more charges with an industrial charge-presser. It'll be like the Charge of the Press Briga--
Sisko: I get the picture. So... um. Well. What if... money?
Quark: First bribe, huh?
Sisko: Does it show?
This one, too.

Quote:
Garak: I've found a seller, but he wants to be paid in bio-mimetic gel.
Sisko: What? That stuff is more dangerous than antimatter radiation! Or talking about it, even!
Garak: I'm afraid he wouldn't budge on this point, Captain. It's bio-way or the highway.
Sisko: Groan. Why can't we just give him some of Odo?
There's plenty more Odo where that bit came from. Although...if he doesn't eat or drink, how does he make more goo?

Quote:
Vreenak ranted that it's only okay for the Romulans to lie to us, not the other way around. I can't believe we agreed to that clause in the Treaty of Algeron. He took off and the Federation would have been cosmically hosed, but two days later....
Worf: Oh no -- the Dominion just destroyed some Romulan senator's ship!
O'Brien: Worf, that's great news! It may get them on our side!
Worf: Oh, hey, you're right. I hadn't really thought past somebody other than me getting to kill Romulans.
Classic Zeke scene.

I liked the chorus line of Troll dolls, and the tables for the running scorecard.
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Old 07-02-2006, 04:26 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sa'ar Chasm
I liked the chorus line of Troll dolls, and the tables for the running scorecard.
Yeah, liked those, and the addition to the image with Jake's "fermentation" line. Heh.
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Old 07-03-2006, 06:02 PM
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Yeah, about Vulcan Love Slave. Can anyone remember which episodes mention it? And for that matter, does Part One get a mention before Part Two: the Revenge is?
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Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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  #10  
Old 07-03-2006, 09:52 PM
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I know it's mentioned as one of the two books almost every Ferengi owns. (The other is, of course, the Rules of Aquisition)
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  #11  
Old 07-05-2006, 06:18 PM
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Quote:
Rom: I wonder how Quark is getting on with his Pakleds.
Quark: (running by en flambé) Vermouth! Vermouth! Vermouth is on fire!
Martus: (contemplative pause) Should we put him out?
Rom: Naw, let the little bugger burn.
He don't need no water.

Quote:
Sisko: Now is not the time for sarcasm, Constable.
Odo: It's always time for sarcasm!
Words to live by.

Quote:
Garak: While you're talking with Vreenak, I'm going to sneak aboard his ship and... uh... do something legal.
Sisko: Sure, that sounds above-board. Is the deck secure, Mr. Worf?
Worf: Yes, but I remain confused that you assigned the security arrangements to me rather than Odo.
Sisko: I just think the Romulans might get snippy with him because of his species. You shouldn't have that problem.
Excellent.

Great fivers, all.

Glad everyone enjoyed the fivers. Special thanks to all those guest fivists who have been fiving and keeping 5MD going. Special thanks also to Zeke who keeps the whole site going. It's been a great three years, and hard to believe it's been three.
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Old 07-05-2006, 07:40 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
Sisko: Now is not the time for Sa'ar Chasm, Constable.
Odo: It's always time for Sa'ar Chasm!
Words to live by.
I agree. Totally and unconditionally beyond shadow of a doubt there that should be long enough to keep the board software happy.
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Old 07-21-2006, 02:44 AM
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Forgot to mention this. I discovered something interesting when I was working on the "Pale Moonlight" fiver. Take a look at the script and search for the phrase "pacing in his office". You'll find a Sisko/Dax scene that was cut from the episode, taking place while Vreenak is inspecting the forged datarod. Personally, I think cutting it was probably best, but it's very interesting. What do you guys think?

(Also, to my great satisfaction, Ben's grammar mistake -- "The soufflé will either rise or it won't" -- wasn't in the script. There's no "either.")
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