| 5MBSG: All Seasons | ||
| THE ORIGINAL SERIES | ||
| The Gun on Ice Planet Zero | Marc Richard | Not as cool as the new show, but still cool! |
| THE MINISERIES | ||
| The Miniseries | Kira | Ron Moore singlehandedly saves science fiction. In four hours, he outdoes over 500 hours of Star Trek, and all other franchises while he's at it. Then he has breakfast. Read the comic version! |
| SEASON 1 | ||
| 33 | Zeke | OMG teh REALSIM! A brilliant start to a brilliant show! |
| Water | Zeke | The ship runs out of something! Voyager NEVER did that EVER! That's because they didn't have RDM! |
| Bastille Day | Zeke | We meet a mass-murdering terrorist, but get this -- he has a dark side! |
| Act of Contrition | Zeke | Starbuck has conflicts in the present, has sex in the past, and crashes in the future! My GOD this show takes chances with its storytelling style! |
| You Can't Go Home Again | Zeke | It's a ship -- a LIVING ship! That's so crazy! I can't believe it's never been done before! Never never never! |
| Litmus | Zeke | Moore has the courage to take a stand against witch-hunts! Go Ron! |
| Six Degrees of Separation | Zeke | Baltar finds out Six can manipulate him with more than just sex! And she can also do it with SEX! |
| Flesh and Bone | Zeke | A gritty, dark torture episode! This show pulls no punches EVER! |
| Tigh Me Up, Tigh Me Down | Zeke | A comical sex farce! This show pulls no punches EVER! |
| The Hand of God | Zeke | We win a big fight with the Cylons! Go humanity! And stuff happens on Caprica too, with that guy whose name I forget! Good thing the show puts his name on screen every time he appears, 'cause otherwise I'd never know it! |
| Colonial Day | Zeke | Roslin picks Baltar as her VP! Good thing he's not busy with other stuff! And don't look now, but I think Tigh's wife is up to something! |
| Kobol's Last Gleaming, Part 1 | Zeke | They find Kobol and it proves Roslin is the Emissary! Unprecedented! |
| Kobol's Last Gleaming, Part 2 | Zeke | The best episode EVER! All the characters fight each other! Total cliffhangerness! And Boomer meets a room full of naked copies of her! Why are they naked? (SLAP) That doesn't matter, you scum! |
| SEASON 2 | ||
| Scattered | Zeke | The fleet gets lost, but Gaeta finds them by networking the ship's computer systems and setting up firewalls to keep the Cylons from hacking them! I bet Star Trek would have resorted to technobabble! |
| Valley of Darkness | Zeke | Cylons invade the ship! Unprepared crew have to fight them with inadequate weapons! It's like Alien, only better because BSG does things better than other things! |
| Fragged | Zeke | BSG does Vietnam! And it's better because see above! |
| Resistance | Zeke | Oh boy, a mutiny! That'll show Tigh! Adama's so gonna kick his ass! And then Adama wakes up and he has a touching scene with Tigh! Awww! |
| The Farm | Zeke | Moore has the courage to take a stand against women being violated! Go Ron! |
| Home, Part 1 | Zeke | Wow, they're gonna find the Tomb of Athena! But who's going to kick their butts first: the Cylons, Adama, Zarek's guy, or Sharon? OH THE DRAMA! I'm on the edge of my seat! |
| Home, Part 2 | Zeke | Best episode EVER! Adama sees the light and lets everyone get away with everything! The fleet goes back to normal! But it's not a reset button because that's what CRAP shows do! |
| Final Cut | Zeke | Take that, nosy journalists! And take that, people who object to nosy journalists! |
| Flight of the Phoenix | Zeke | Can Sharon be trusted? Can she? CAN SHE? This is so much more complicated than all the other "can someone be trusted" stories! CAN SHE?! |
| Pegasus | Zeke | Another battlestar shows up -- and it has DARK SECRETS! Man, I never expected DARK SECRETS! I thought it would just be two ships meeting up! |
| Resurrection Ship, Part 1 | Zeke | Moore has the courage to take a stand against raping prisoners! Go Ron! |
| Resurrection Ship, Part 2 | Zeke | Best episode EVER! Both commanders wimp out of assassinating each other, and then Cain is killed anyway! Talk about convenient, only realistic and not convenient! |
| Epiphanies | Zeke | Roslin's cancer is magically cured, but it's not cheap at all! Honest! It's not like they're going to forget this and never use the baby's magic blood cells again! |
| Black Market | Zeke | Apollo sleeps with a hooker! Just goes to show that BSG is Sci-Fi Sexuality Dealt With! You can tell because there's lots of sex in it and it isn't Star Trek! |
| Scar | Zeke | The first episode where every line has "frak" in it! And there's SEX! This show just keeps getting better! |
| Sacrifice | Zeke | Billy gets his heart broken by Dee and then dies for her! I don't know about you, but I can't wait to see Dee have lots of sex with Apollo now! |
| The Captain's Hand | Zeke | Moore has the courage to take a stand against the horrible soulless evil Nazi pro-lifers! Go Ron! |
| Downloaded | Zeke | Wow, an episode starring Six and Boomer where they don't have sex with anybody! It's still good, though! And maybe there was sex after the credits! |
| Lay Down Your Burdens, Part 1 | Zeke | Oh boy oh boy oh boy, election! Who's gonna win? And omg cliffhanger! |
| Lay Down Your Burdens, Part 2 | Zeke | OH EM EFFING GEE! Best episode EVER!! An evil guy is elected (take that, Bush!) Fixing elections is declared wrong (take that, Bush!) Choosing not to fight anymore gets the humans royally screwed (take that, Bush!) And the show JUMPS FORWARD A YEAR! Holy GOD the originality! No other show would EVER take such risks! RDM IS GOD! |
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5MBSG Seasons:
TOS Mini 1 2 All
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