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Five-Minute "Rejoined"

by Marc Richard

Sisko: You'd better make yourself scarce, old man. A team of Trill scientists is coming here to create an artificial wormhole.
Jadzia: And you think that would bother me? Why?
Sisko: Because their leader is Doctor Lenara K--
Jadzia: Kaaaaaaaaahnnnnnn!
Sisko: Quod erat demonstrandum.

Kira: Why did you and Doctor Kahn look at each other so strangely?
Jadzia: She's my ex-spouse.
Kira: "Ex" as in "divorced"?
Jadzia: "Ex" as in "joined the choir everlasting."
Kira: Hmm. It's a little weird to think of her as your dead wife.
Jadzia: Imagine how I feel about being her dead husband.

Bashir: Trill society doesn't allow joined Trills to reassociate with past lovers.
Kira: Even if they still care for each other? What a stupid custom.
Bashir: Oh? Does Bajoran society allow Bajoran lovers to trade earrings?
Kira: Absolutely not! Some traditions are sacred!

Lenara: Pssst -- everyone at the party is watching us.
Jadzia: I've noticed. Maybe they're expecting us to tear each other's clothes off.
Lenara: Or hoping that we get into a fight. I'm quite notorious for my wrath, you know.
Jadzia: I certainly do.
Lenara: Hey!

Jadzia: I wish that I'd...I mean, that Torias had...listened to you...I mean listened to Nilani...before climbing into that untested shuttle.
Lenara: That's all right. Everyone's entitled to one fatal mistake.
Jadzia: True -- but I've made more than my share of those.

Jadzia: Could you chaperone Lenara and me at dinner this evening?
Bashir: I can't. I have a date to watch an old Earth movie tonight.
Jadzia: What movie could be more important than helping me out?
Bashir: Romeo and Juliet -- the story of two lovers whose families don't approve of their relationship.
Jadzia: Oooh, I bet it's one of those sweet romance films that has a wonderful happy ending!
Bashir: Uh...not quite.

Jadzia: ...and then there was the time when Nilani told Torias she wanted to study quantum physics....
Bashir: Zzzzzzz....
Lenara: I remember! His eyes completely glazed over, just like Doctor Bashir's!
Bashir: Huh? I'm sorry, did someone mention my name?

Jadzia: I love your earrings.
Lenara: Thanks. A Klingon scientist gave them to me, along with a stupid sword. Here -- keep them.
Jadzia: Are you sure you wouldn't rather unload that sword?

Lenara: Begin generating the subspace matrix.
Dr. Otner: Done. It's working! We've opened a wormhole!
Dr. Pren: I wonder what part of the galaxy it leads to?
Jadzia: Sensors are picking up a giant alien array and a desert planet on the other side.
Pren: That's not a very useful answer to my question.

Lenara: My brother thinks we're having an affair!
Jadzia: I can understand why. You're still the queen of my heart.
Lenara: But have we both fully assimilated what the consequences might be?
Jadzia: Absolutely.
Lenara: Then resistance is futile.

Otner: Wormhole now open for second test. Launch the probe.
Pren: Probe away. Soon we'll know exactly where the wormhole leads t--
Pren: Or perhaps not....

Jadzia: But soft! What light from yonder warp core breaks?
Eddington: It's called a plasma fire, and Doctor Kahn is trapped behind it.
Lenara: Oh Jadzia, Jadzia, wherefore art thou Jadzia?
Jadzia: I fly to thy rescue, for fiery limits cannot hold love out!
Worf: (over the comm) Engineering, what's going on down there?
Eddington: It's a long story. Five acts long, to be precise.

Otner: Thanks for saving my sister -- but don't try to convince her to stay here with you.
Jadzia: And why not? Because we'd be in trouble with Trill society?
Otner: Exactly. She's already in enough trouble with her research grant agency for the failure of the wormhole experiment.
Jadzia: You're just saying that because O'Brien is sending them the bill for the repairs to the Defiant!

Jadzia: Please exile yourself from Trill society and throw away everything you've worked for to stay here with me!
Lenara: I think you've lost Curzon's flair for persuasive diplomacy.
Jadzia: Well, at least sleep on it before you decide. Meanwhile, I shall say good night till it be morrow!
Lenara: At which time you will see that parting is such sweet sorrow.
Jadzia: But there's no rhyme or reason in your answer! Well, no reason anyway.

Lenara: Goodbye, Mr. Worf. Have you seen Jadzia?
Worf: She is up there, leaning against the railing. Would you like me to get you a ladder?
Lenara: No, thanks. Just give her this book for me, will you?
Worf: Romeo and Juliet: The Improved Edition. What is improved about it?
Lenara: They edited out everything except the balcony scene.
(The Trill ship leaves the station at Ludicrous Speed)


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This fiver was originally published on January 28, 2003.

DISCLAIMER: A lot of stuff in here is copyrighted by Paramount Pictures. My intent isn't to infringe on that; I and those like me are just having a little fun in the universe Gene Roddenberry created. I don't think he'd mind.

All material © 2003, Marc Richard.