Five-Minute Star Trek: Armada
Captain's Log: Here we are in the middle of nowhere just minding our own business...|
Player: Hmm... could they be here waiting for some major plot point to take place?
Of course, absolutely nothing could happen out in this boring sector of space.
Temporal Rift: Burp.
Captain's Log: Oops, it seems I was wrong (heh heh heh). Let's build a base here before we save the Premonition, whose name is certainly not foreshadowing.
Captain Denning: (whistling) Oh, look, it's the Enterprise! What took you?
Federation: Aaaa! The Borg! Ow, ow, ow!
Klingons: Let's randomly start a war just when the Federation needs us most!
Sela: Sweet! We found the Omega Particle! Neener, neener!
Player: Why do I have to reinvent all of my cool technology in every mission?
Borg Drone: Although we've assimilated thousands of species, we have yet to understand the simple art of cloning, despite the fact that every other major race in the galaxy does. So we need to capture a Vorta cloning facility and learn this art quickly so we can recreate a long-dead Borg.
Locutus: I'm baaack!
Federation: Aaaaah! (runs around like headless chicken) GAK!
Captain's Log: Through a badly contrived concept filled with half-baked ideas and violations of the Temporal Prime Directive, we have created a plan by which we hope to save the Federation.
Picard: ...So, put simply, you have to go into the future to preserve the timeline.
Lots of Stuff: Boom.
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DISCLAIMER: A lot of stuff in here is copyright Activision, who recently ended their contract with Trek for a hilariously dim reason. Be that as it may, no infringement is intended on either ST or Activision. They made a pretty cool Ghostbusters game for Commodore 64, I have to respect that....
All material © 2003, J. Heaney.