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Zeke presents....
The Top 10 Signs That You're Not In Smallville
- Things happen to you that have nothing to do with space rocks
- Your ethnicity is anything other than white or whatever the hell Lana's supposed to be
- You're not keeping secrets from your loved ones (and if you were, you'd have good reasons)
- Your distance from Metropolis is constant
- If someone used super-powers in front of you, you would notice
- Always in motion is your future
- You're not hearing that smug voiceover -- no, wait, that's one of the top ten signs that you're not in Neptune
- You can breathe without needing a special angst filter
- You're Pete Ross
And the number one sign that you're not in Smallville....
- You don't think you're in Kansas anymore
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This list was originally published on May 10, 2006.
DISCLAIMER: If you're wondering where Neptune is, it's on Mars.
All material © 2006, Colin Hayman.
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