#1
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0]
The 5MD event continues today with a trilogy of fivers from Nic Corelli: "The Storyteller," "The Forsaken," and "Dramatis Personae." Yep, those are all from Season 1. What can I say? Nic's a minimalist chef -- he only uses one seasoning.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short [03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem. [03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction |
#2
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0]If I type how much I laughed, I'd be sitting here all day.
Brilliant job. I bow to thee, Nic. Gatac[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Katy: Can I have the skill 'drive car off bridge and have parachute handy'? Justin: It's kind of a limited skill. Greg: Depends on how often you drive off bridges. - d02 Quotes |
#3
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0]Great fivers, Nic. It'd been so long since I last read them that I'd forgotten most of the jokes.
I liked the imposter ambassadors bit in "The Forsaken", and the LotR stuff in "The Storyteller, but my favorite scene is in "Dramatis Personae" [quoteost_uid0]Odo: Hm, perhaps the log entries from the Klingon ship will reveal something to me about this strange phenomenon... Klingon Captain's Log: Dear Diary. Today my Operations Officer killed my Tactical Officer. Then the Chief Engineer killed my Operations Officer. Then the First Officer killed the Chief Engineer. Finally, I killed the First Officer. Odo: Damn, nothing unusual there...[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
__________________
"Please, Aslan," said Lucy, "what do you call soon?" "I call all times soon," said Aslan; and instantly he vanished away and Lucy was alone with the Magician. |
#4
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Constable's Log: Lwaxana invades our space, and we fall back. Lwaxana annoys entire space stations, and we fall back. Not again!
Lwaxana: Ooodoooo... Odo: Shut up! The line must be drawn here! Lwaxana: Where, in this puddle of goo you're leaking? [/quoteost_uid0] Too evil! I love it! Great job, Nic.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Kirk: Bones, this man needs medical attention! McCoy: Dammit Jim I'm a Doctor, not a... oh sure! |
#5
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0]*yoinks phrase*
WHOOPIE YEEBA YEEBA! Thanks Nic and Derek![/colorost_uid0] |
#6
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]O'Brien: Oh no! What am I going to do? Have you seen the monster? It's very cryptic ...
Bashir: And rather obscure ... O'Brien: It almost looks like ... Bashir: A baguette! O'Brien: (shudder) [/quoteost_uid0] :snicker: [quoteost_uid0]Bashir: Um ... why don't you inflict that torment on, say, Chief O'Brien instead? He always impersonates you and says that Kirk and Picard were way better Captains. Sisko: He does? That's it, he's going down. I'll give him seven years of needless, sick torment ... Cardassian tribunal, Cardassian jail, temporal anomalies ... [/quoteost_uid0] The real reason comes out. [quoteost_uid0]Odo: Doctor, I finally got it! The spheres from the Klingon ship are making everyone go evil! Bashir: How did you come to that brilliant conclusion, Constable? Odo: Shhh... (...) Spheres: Evil, evil, evil... Bashir: Oh, I see. [/quoteost_uid0] :lol: Nice work, [bost_uid0]Nic[/bost_uid0]![/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Methinks Ted Sturgeon was too kind. 'Yes, but I think some people should be offended.' -- John Cleese (on whether he thought some might be offended by Monty Python) |
#7
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Varis: Yes. North Bajor has too many M & Ms. [/quoteost_uid0]
At last we discover what that handle REALLY means... [quoteost_uid0]Village: Hit the road, Jack, and don't you come back no more, no more, no more, no more... [/quoteost_uid0] Rest in peace, Ray...[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Any truth is better than indefinite doubt. — Sherlock Holmes "The Adventure of the Yellow Face," Arthur Conan Doyle |
#8
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid0]Great trio of fivers!
[quoteost_uid0]Dax: You keep forgetting this is a Cardassian computer, Benjamin. It told him, "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries." Constable's Log: Lwaxana invades our space, and we fall back. Lwaxana annoys entire space stations, and we fall back. Not again! Kira: You are a dumb being, created by a dumb being. Finding your weakness will be a matter of two or three seconds! [/quoteost_uid0] And my absolute favourite: [quoteost_uid0]Kira: We can't get you out now. We'll get you out... soon. Odo: Hm... define "soon." Kira: Impossible. [/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Marc 5MNG Section Head |
#9
|
||||
|
||||
[color=#000000ost_uid7]Lots and lots of hilarious stuff in this update!
[quoteost_uid7]O'Brien: What? I fought in the Cardassian War and served aboard the Enterprise, and suddenly you outrank me? That's ridiculous! Bashir: Yes, but that's nothing compared to the fact that Troi outranks you. That's just hysterical![/quoteost_uid7] Indeed it is! [quoteost_uid7]Villager: The old man is dying. Bashir: That's it? Villager: Well, yes. Bashir: You said the entire village was on the verge of extinction! Where's the mutated virus? The black plague? The hideous acne epidemic? Villager: I'm so sorry we failed your expectations. There is one child with measles, if that helps. ... Navot Diplomat: It is ours! The treaty clearly says the river Moppy is the border. Varis: It is not! It's the river Meow Meow. And on the east it's the river Moo.[/quoteost_uid7] :lol: [quoteost_uid7]Varis: Yes. North Bajor has too many M & Ms.[/quoteost_uid7] *double-take* [quoteost_uid7]O'Brien: Oh no! What am I going to do? Have you seen the monster? It's very cryptic... Bashir: And rather obscure... O'Brien: It almost looks like... Bashir: A baguette![/quoteost_uid7] ROFL! :lol: [quoteost_uid7]Varis: My father used to start all negotiations with the words: "I will rip your heads off and you will drown in the pool of your own blood!" Nog: Um... and what would your mother say? Varis: Between the "Clean your room! Wash the dishes! Take out the trash!" screams, it's actually quite hard to understand her. ... Sisko: So, who was this Dal'Rok anyway? Bashir: It was the dazed and confused monster in a top hat. Everyone: NOOOOOOOO![/quoteost_uid7] Heeheehee. [quoteost_uid7]Sisko: GASP! You most certainly will not! Odo: I'm sorry, sir... Sisko: That's the only toaster I have, and it works beautifully. Go throw her off the upper pylon or something.[/quoteost_uid7] Bwahahaha! [quoteost_uid7]Kira: I just hope everything stays normal until I assemble an army of flying monkeys to destroy Sisko's league with the Devil. ... Kira: You are a dumb being, created by a dumb being. Finding your weakness will be a matter of two or three seconds! Odo: Commander, I need to speak with you. I must report a very strange behaviour throughout the station. Sisko: Oh. That is a most disturbing news. I hope you'll solve this problem, Constable, as you always do, while I finish constructing my Massive Clock of DOOM! ... O'Brien: But not if we return with the 300-meter six-headed nine-winged fire-breathing Vulcan dinosaur![/quoteost_uid7] Heehee. Way to go Nic![/colorost_uid7]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#10
|
|||
|
|||
[color=#000000ost_uid0]Another 3 great ones
[quoteost_uid0]Jake: Why are we just sitting here all day? Let's play baseball! Nog: Stop pestering me with that! Baseball is boring. Jake: Okay, then... how about water polo? Nog: AAAAA! Baseball's great! Let's play baseball! [/quoteost_uid0] LOL! [quoteost_uid0]Odo: She almost makes you seem like a pleasant company. Lwaxana: BUAAAA! My jewellery is stolen! HELP HELP HELPHELPHELPHELP... Odo: The word "almost" is hereby withdrawn. [/quoteost_uid0] Hehe, gotta love Lwaxana. [quoteost_uid0]Sisko: Doctor! You're alive! And you managed to protect the Ambassadors! Bashir: Yeah. Now please escort Subcommander T'Vek, Gul Damarra and Senior Cabal Officer Rilik to the brig. [/quoteost_uid0] This and all the running commentary in the Bashir/Ambassadors scences were great! [quoteost_uid0]Sisko: Oh. That is a most disturbing news. I hope you'll solve this problem, Constable, as you always do, while I finish constructing my Massive Clock of DOOM! Odo: Um... what made you start constructing a clock? Sisko: I don't know! But never mind that, look at it... Odo: It's MASSIVE! [/quoteost_uid0] Clock of doom, bwhahaha! And it even had continuity since it was seen several times in Sisco's office in later episodes. [quoteost_uid0]Odo: I will trap Kira, Sisko and O'Brien in the cargo bay, Kira will think I trapped them for her. I will stall them as long as I can, but then you have to release the aquatiblunoshmoozitron pulse to incapacitate the spheres. Bashir: And then we take over the Alpha Quadrant? Odo: (sigh) Yes, then we take over the Alpha Quadrant... Now get to work![/quoteost_uid0] Hehe, poor Odo.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
--Quinalla |
#11
|
||||
|
||||
[quoteost_uid0="Quinalla"][color=#000000ost_uid0]Clock of doom, bwhahaha! And it even had continuity since it was seen several times in Sisco's office in later episodes.[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0]Yeah, even in season five. Now that`s continuity! Thanks everyone, glad you liked the fivers, [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
\"Lord Eddard Stark is a proud, honourable, honest man, and his lady wife is worse.\" ~A Game of Thrones, book one of Song of Ice and Fire |
|
|