Sa`ar, Get an LJ - The Campaign

[Nic Corelli]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Hah! I bet you thought we`ve given up!

You know you want to... all your friends are doing it!

Reasons to Get an LJ (Live Journal):

1. LJs are cool
2. LJs are pretty
3. LJs are painted in a variety of colours
4. LJs contain Vitamin C
5. LJs protect you from ultra-violet radiation!

Reasons why Sa`ar is Afraid of LJs:

1. Sa`ar thinks LJs are tribbles, they will multiply and eat all of his pizza
2. Sa`ar is afraid LJs are evil clowns that eat children and bad punners
3. He is haunted by a misguided fear that an LJ will suck his soul out through his left ear
4. He`s afraid that if he gets an LJ, his polymer goo will achieve sentience and devour him

Reasons Why Sa`ar Needs an LJ

1. He already reads tons of LJs. That practically makes him an LJ fan
2. He comments in tons of LJs. He desperately needs one.
3. All his comments are titled "Anonymous". Such a shame considering he could take nicknames like Sa`argon The Great or Squeakybobo
4. It will earn him cookie points
5. Because

Things That Will Happen to Sa`ar If He Doesn`t Get an LJ

1. 17 will launch a volley of intercontinental biochemical thermonuclear baguettes on him
2. He will be thwapped over the head by Deep Space 9, Babylon 5 and the Super Star Destroyer together at the same time
3. Oddity the Psychotic Cat will be unleashed to eat him alive.
4. His new fivers will be scheduled for and published [iost_uid0]soon[/iost_uid0]
5. He will live his entire life in regret, wondering what would have happened if he had gotten an LJ[/colorost_uid0]