The Five-Minute Forums  

Go Back   The Five-Minute Forums > FiveMinute.net > Fiver By Committee

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 11-25-2003, 10:25 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,351
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0](Hey, I forgot to give the Block 17 thread a subtitle! Dang.)

Before I start on this, about last block... I don't think we should be all that worried about how long it took. Remember, the previous two blocks went [iost_uid0]really[/iost_uid0] fast, so we're still making good progress. Also, Block 17 wasn't like the other slow blocks we've had -- it took a long time not because it was forgotten for weeks or something but because the ideas just kept coming. So let's not be too frustrated at how long it took. But let's not take that long with this one, either.

Morpheus and the group (all the [iost_uid0]Nebuchadnezzar[/iost_uid0] crew but Tank and Dozer) enter the Matrix. Morpheus, Neo, Trinity, and Cypher get in a car and head off to see the Oracle, the wonderful Oracle of Oz. There are some small bits here we can probably skip -- Cypher dropping his cellphone in the garbage for the Agents to trace, Trinity not telling Neo what the Oracle said to her. On the elevator ride up, Morpheus and Neo discuss the Oracle; apparently she made the prophecy about the One, and told Morpheus he would be the one to find him.

In the anteroom, Neo waits with "the other Potentials." Rather than potential slayers, these are little kids doing classic psychic stuff like levitating blocks and bending spoons. The spoon-bender, a bald boy dressed like a Zen monk, tells Neo the secret is not to bend the spoon but to realize the truth -- that there is no spoon. When he sees this, he will see that it is not the spoon but himself that bends. Neo picks up a spoon and has [iost_uid0]just[/iost_uid0] managed to bend it when he's called in.

(Just a little sidebar... anyone heard the old Zen koan about the flag? It goes like this: Two monks were arguing about a flag. One said: 'The flag is moving.' The other said: 'The wind is moving.' The sixth patriarch happened to be passing by. He told them: 'Not the wind, not the flag; mind is moving.'")

Let's say 2-3 scenes for this block. The synopsis is here, and it's worth reading because there's a whole conversation between Neo and Morpheus that didn't make it into the movie.[/colorost_uid0]

__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
  #2  
Old 11-25-2003, 11:05 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]I don't count two-week votes, Zeke. Ah, well. New block, and all is well.

[quoteost_uid0]
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Hi, I'm doing a survey. What did the Oracle tell [iost_uid0]you?[/iost_uid0]
[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] She told me I'm the Super Ohm. 'Cause, you see, when you scramble it all up -- well, anyway, I've got high hopes for you.
[bost_uid0]Boy:[/bost_uid0] She told me there is no spoon.
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] She said that I--
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Shush, Trin. Can't you see the boy's telling me about his spoon?[/quoteost_uid0]

[quoteost_uid0][bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Wow, look! There is... no... spoon!
[bost_uid0]Spoon Boy:[/bost_uid0] Very funny. Now give it back, will you?[/quoteost_uid0]

This is me at 1am:

[quoteost_uid0][bost_uid0]Spoon Boy:[/bost_uid0] You must realize the truth. It is not the spoon that is bending - that's impossible.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] "Spoon" is fun to say. Spoon, spoon, spoon...
[bost_uid0]Spoon Boy:[/bost_uid0] ...there is no spoon. Then you will see that it is not the spoon that bends, but-- are you listening?
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Spoon! Spoon. Spooooooonnnn. Heh, heh.
[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]

__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #3  
Old 11-26-2003, 12:48 AM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,858
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Neo: I guess bending spoons helps you focus your mental powers, huh?
Young Boy: "Focus my mental powers"? What are you talking about? We sell these to the tourists as souvenirs to keep this place going.[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]

__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct. -- Isto Combs
  #4  
Old 11-26-2003, 01:00 AM
Sa'ar Chasm's Avatar
Sa'ar Chasm Sa'ar Chasm is offline
Our last, best hope for peace
Staff
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sitting (in Ottawa)
Posts: 3,425
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: This is the Matrix? Looks greener than I remember.
((Or bluer. I've forgotten which tint goes where.))

Weird kid: There is no spoon.
Neo: Then what am I holding?
Weird kid: A spork.
Neo: Ah. *spork bends* Ow! I sprained a neuron.

((That kid's a boy?))

Morpheus: There were five before you.
Neo: What happened to them?
Morpheus: They burned down, fell over and sank into the swamp.

Possible Tick reference to Spoooooon!

Bah. My initial offerings are always sub-par, plus I always forget whatever brilliance I've dreamed up in advance.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them.
  #5  
Old 11-26-2003, 03:12 AM
Derek's Avatar
Derek Derek is offline
Dean of misderektion
Senior Staff
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sector 001
Posts: 1,106
Default

[quoteost_uid0="Sa'ar Chasm"][color=#000000ost_uid0]Morpheus: There were five before you.
Neo: What happened to them?
Morpheus: They burned down, fell over and sank into the swamp.[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0]^ :lol: This is a great one.

Well, since Zeke already stole my planned Potential joke, I'll have to try something else....

[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] What did the Oracle tell you?
[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] I don't know. Something something shanshu something apocalypse. I kinda zoned out and made up the prophecy about the One.

[bost_uid0]Potential:[/bost_uid0] Remember the important truth: There is no spoon.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] That sounds like its liable to get me killed.
[bost_uid0]Potential:[/bost_uid0] I hope so. I'm one of the next ones on the list to be the One.

And just to beat a dead horse one more time...

[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] I can only show you the door. You have to go through it.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] And meet the powers that be?
[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] No, moron, the Oracle. Pay attention.

(So I've been watching a lot of Buffy and Angel recently.)

Anyway, my vote so far goes to Standback. I'm revising it since I don't like the anagram joke. Not that I really like my own, but here goes.

[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] So what did the Oracle tell you?
[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] She told me I would stop slapping people with fishes.
[bost_uid0]Boy:[/bost_uid0] She told me there is no spoon.
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] She said that I--
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Shush, Trin. Can't you see the boy's telling me about his spoon?[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
"Please, Aslan," said Lucy, "what do you call soon?"
"I call all times soon," said Aslan; and instantly he vanished away and Lucy was alone with the Magician.
  #6  
Old 11-26-2003, 03:38 AM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,858
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: Hey! You've got lots of spoons. Could I have one?
Spoon Boy: You've got a lot to learn, haven't you? There [iost_uid0]is[/iost_uid0] no spoon.
Neo: Hmph. You just don't want to give me one of your spoons. Meanie.



Neo: Could I have a spoon?
Spoon Boy: There [iost_uid0]is[/iost_uid0] no spoon. It's all a government conspiracy involving cell phones, garbage cans, and chauffeurs who turn traitor.
Neo: What did you say?
Spoon Boy: Oh, nothing.



I'm going to do this next one just because I can.

Neo: Wow, you've lot a got of spoon--er--
Boy: Isms can be tongue-twisters. But I got tired of them and now twist a lot of spoons instead.
Neo: Yeah, you do have a lot of spoons. That's what I was sighing to tray--er...[/colorost_uid0]

__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct. -- Isto Combs
  #7  
Old 11-26-2003, 03:42 AM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,351
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Personally, I think that Super Ohm joke is hilarious. But disregard me. I'm supposed to be impartial and stuff.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
  #8  
Old 11-26-2003, 04:38 AM
Kira's Avatar
Kira Kira is offline
Annoy, tiny blonde one! Annoy like the wind!
Former Staff
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Mars
Posts: 780
Send a message via ICQ to Kira Send a message via MSN to Kira Send a message via Yahoo to Kira
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]I don't even [iost_uid0]get[/iost_uid0] the Super Ohm joke. But then, I'm tired.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
\"It\'s all fun and games until one of you gets my foot up your ass.\"
--Veronica Mars
  #9  
Old 11-26-2003, 07:22 AM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]He's also the Peru Mosh. Does that help?

I'm wondering whether the block could be improved by a line from Cypher, something like:

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] She told me I'd betray you all to-- um, never mind.

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] She told me to keep away from steaks. Stupid Oracle.

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] She told me that it's not that important to confirm every kill.

Ech. The problem being, I'm having difficulty finding one that's actually amusing...[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #10  
Old 11-26-2003, 07:26 AM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]
[bost_uid0]Boy:[/bost_uid0] Look. I am bending the spoon. Stand in awe at the Power of the Mind.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Gee, thanks. Any Agents come after me, now I can bend spoons at 'em.[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #11  
Old 11-26-2003, 07:39 AM
Sa'ar Chasm's Avatar
Sa'ar Chasm Sa'ar Chasm is offline
Our last, best hope for peace
Staff
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sitting (in Ottawa)
Posts: 3,425
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]^ This is a great one.
[/quoteost_uid0]

You're just saying that because it's Monty Python.

Morpheus: You have to have faith, Neo. I have faith. Faith of...
Neo: If you say "Faith of the heart," I'm going home.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them.
  #12  
Old 11-26-2003, 02:30 PM
catalina_marina's Avatar
catalina_marina catalina_marina is offline
Surfin' you say?
Member
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: North-West of the South-East of Nowhere.
Posts: 4,949
Send a message via ICQ to catalina_marina Send a message via AIM to catalina_marina Send a message via MSN to catalina_marina Send a message via Yahoo to catalina_marina
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Personally, I think that Super Ohm joke is hilarious.[/quoteost_uid0]
I agree, it’s genius.

Not sure if it was meant that way, but I can't help thinking of 'resistance'[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
~Bachelor of Science Marijke

I'm not the devil, I just work for her.

What spoon? There is no spoon. According to Zeke, it's a cat. ~NeoMatrix

"Apparently we're on the wrong side. Or the right side if you like winning." ~Spike

Sa'ar Chasm: Too far south you hit Belgium.
catalina marina: Not in Limburg you don't.
Sa'ar Chasm: You do if you go south in the right way.
  #13  
Old 11-26-2003, 06:06 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,351
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0="catalina_marina"]Not sure if it was meant that way, but I can't help thinking of 'resistance'[/quoteost_uid0]
LOL! A whole level of the joke I didn't see![/colorost_uid0]

__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
  #14  
Old 11-26-2003, 06:09 PM
Pteryx's Avatar
Pteryx Pteryx is offline
Spritely
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Auburn, ME
Posts: 73
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: So this Oracle at Delphi --
Morpheus: New York.
Neo: -- whatever, she's going to tell me that I'm the One now? What did she tell you?
Morpheus: That I would be the one to find the One.
Neo: My head hurts.


Spoon Boy: Realize the truth.
Neo: The truth?
Spoon Boy: That there is no spoon.
Neo: There is no spoon?
Spoon Boy: Please stop echoing everything I say minus one word as a question.
Neo: Stop echoing everything you say minus one word as a question?[/colorost_uid0]
  #15  
Old 11-26-2003, 09:46 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]LOL! A whole level of the joke I didn't see! [/quoteost_uid0]

You see, whenever my literature teachers go on about the author's O-so-subtle hints, it's these kind of incidents I remember.

But I'm glad the joke is appreciated.

I liked Pteryx's Spoon Boy block above. Pteryx - any particular reason you're holding onto your "guest" status so avidly? We definitely want to see more of you around. [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #16  
Old 11-27-2003, 05:23 AM
Pteryx's Avatar
Pteryx Pteryx is offline
Spritely
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Auburn, ME
Posts: 73
Default

[quoteost_uid0="Standback"][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]But I'm glad the joke is appreciated.[/quoteost_uid0]

Count me in as someone else who really likes the Super Ohm joke, BTW! I just tossed my original version of that block up because I felt it'd be good to get more ideas out at this stage. Standback's joke also happens to fit nicely with Morpheus's "I like anagrams" line much earlier in the fiver.

[quoteost_uid0]I liked Pteryx's Spoon Boy block above. Pteryx - any particular reason you're holding onto your "guest" status so avidly? We definitely want to see more of you around. [/quoteost_uid0]

Why, thank you on both counts! As for why I haven't registered... well, I haven't seen a real reason to. Any particular benefits to it aside from getting an avatar and being able to edit your own posts? -- Pteryx[/colorost_uid0]
  #17  
Old 11-27-2003, 05:32 AM
Pteryx's Avatar
Pteryx Pteryx is offline
Spritely
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Auburn, ME
Posts: 73
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: Hi, I'm doing a survey. What did the Oracle tell [iost_uid0]you?[/iost_uid0]
Morpheus: She told me I'm the Super Ohm. 'Cause, you see, when you scramble it all up -- well, anyway, I've got high hopes for you.
Cypher: She said I was a nothing! Can you believe that?!
Trinity: She said that I--
Neo: Hey, my favorite noodle house![/colorost_uid0]
  #18  
Old 11-27-2003, 08:51 AM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]As for why I haven't registered... well, I haven't seen a real reason to. Any particular benefits to it aside from getting an avatar and being able to edit your own posts? [/quoteost_uid0]

Well... nothing overly major... The color scheme's nicer, you can see more easily which posts are new and which you've already read... And being able to edit your posts is actually a major plus for me. It's mainly the feeling of some sort of distinction between "yeah, that guy's a member" and "oh, he's a guest." [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #19  
Old 11-27-2003, 09:14 AM
catalina_marina's Avatar
catalina_marina catalina_marina is offline
Surfin' you say?
Member
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: North-West of the South-East of Nowhere.
Posts: 4,949
Send a message via ICQ to catalina_marina Send a message via AIM to catalina_marina Send a message via MSN to catalina_marina Send a message via Yahoo to catalina_marina
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]And certain people can put a title just below your name. I'm not sure whether that's a plus or a minus, but still. [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
~Bachelor of Science Marijke

I'm not the devil, I just work for her.

What spoon? There is no spoon. According to Zeke, it's a cat. ~NeoMatrix

"Apparently we're on the wrong side. Or the right side if you like winning." ~Spike

Sa'ar Chasm: Too far south you hit Belgium.
catalina marina: Not in Limburg you don't.
Sa'ar Chasm: You do if you go south in the right way.
  #20  
Old 11-27-2003, 12:59 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0](Hey, I forgot to give the Block 17 thread a subtitle! Dang.)[/quoteost_uid0]

Block 18 as well, I believe. Whoops. [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
Closed Thread

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 07:46 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.