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Old 12-27-2005, 02:09 AM
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Default December 26



And now, at last, the honest-to-Kryptonian-god conclusion of the Smallville event. Drumroll, please... here's Five-Minute Superman: The Movie, by Scooter! You'll believe a man can five.


Be sure to check out the front page -- I've finally made a new Christmas banner. And be here tomorrow for a big change of pace.
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Old 12-27-2005, 03:01 AM
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Quote:
Lex: Otis, chap with the cape there. Five rounds rapid.
I always somehow forget just how lethal Scooter's one-liners can be. Probably one of those subconcious self-preseveration thingys.

Hurrah! And also, GAK!
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Old 12-27-2005, 04:10 AM
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Zeke- like the way the seasonal site update looks. Is there any chance that this thing I should be here for will involve something I've actually seen? As a member of the next generation of Fiver readers, I wholeheartedly approve boldly reading what I've never seen before, but it gets a little annoying sometimes.
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Old 12-27-2005, 06:47 AM
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This one's a Voyager update.

Hmm... there seems to be a lot of interest in getting back to Trek stuff. Several of you guys mentioned your hopes for new ENT fivers recently. I'll bear that in mind.
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 12-27-2005, 07:11 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by e of pi
... involve something I've actually seen?
I too would love to see more Trek stuff but -- you mean you haven't seen Superman: The Movie? I thought everyone had! It was the Matrix of 1978!
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Old 12-27-2005, 07:58 AM
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I do know a few people who never saw Matrix...

(Heathens, all of them.)

Gatac
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Old 12-27-2005, 05:50 PM
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Or only four when it came out... you forget I'm 15.
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We are the BSG. Your resources and injokes wil be added to our own, depleting your fanbase. Resistance is futile. So say we all.
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Old 12-27-2005, 07:51 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gatac
I do know a few people who never saw Matrix...

(Heathens, all of them.)

Gatac
How dare ye call me a heathen!
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Old 12-28-2005, 03:29 AM
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My name's Heather, not heathen. hehe. Silly gatac.
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Old 12-28-2005, 03:31 AM
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Quote:
Jimmy: Thanks, Superman! I heard you repaired the whole San Andreas single-handedly!
Superman: Yes, Jimmy, I was generous to a fault.
That is awful.

Quote:
Clark: All those powers, and I couldn't save him. Now I have no father.
Voice of Jor-El: Son, remember how much fun we had cruising through the Mutara Nebula --
Clark: No father at all.
Jor-El was hilarious. Good job on his characterization in general. Both as tour guide and as general pain-in-the-butt.
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Old 12-28-2005, 10:50 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Derek
Jor-El was hilarious. Good job on his characterization in general. Both as tour guide and as general pain-in-the-butt.
Thanks. I find it very ominous that the trailer for Superman Returns features only the voice of Marlon Brando's Jor-El.
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Old 12-28-2005, 10:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Quote:
Originally Posted by Derek
Jor-El was hilarious. Good job on his characterization in general. Both as tour guide and as general pain-in-the-butt.
Thanks. I find it very ominous that the trailer for Superman Returns features only the voice of Marlon Brando's Jor-El.
Sorry, that was me.
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Old 12-28-2005, 12:57 PM
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Sad to say my own wife has not seen the Matrix
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Old 12-28-2005, 02:12 PM
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^ Neither has my wife.

And I meant to mention this earlier, Zeke:
Quote:
You'll believe a man can five.
Quote:
20,000 Justice Leagues under the sea
Quote:
Jingle bells, Batman sm-- no, wait
Quote:
Clark dies! Really! And Seven returns to the Borg!
Are simply terrible. Terrible! And also highly amusing.
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Old 12-29-2005, 01:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Derek
Are simply terrible. Terrible! And also highly amusing.
I also wanted to call attention to the terrible and very funny Smallville blurbs.
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Old 12-30-2005, 03:06 PM
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Default Re: December 26

Quote:
Indian Chief: ...And then Custer said, "Not with an orangutan I won't!
Nice work, Scooter. Too many good lines to quote them all, but this was too good to pass up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke


Be sure to check out the front page -- I've finally made a new Christmas banner.
Nice!
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Old 12-31-2005, 04:11 PM
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Fun stuff, Scooter!
I remember thinking how the storyline was kept waiting for oh-so-long when I saw the movie as well.
Valium: I'm probably worse than a heathen with regard to Matrix, which may or may not make you feel better.
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Old 01-09-2006, 10:24 AM
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In light of Zeke's disclaimer on the Superman fiver, this is absorbing and appalling reading: the 20-year nightmare of Superman V/Superman Returns.
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Old 01-09-2006, 11:25 AM
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Oh WOW. That's link day material, no question. I knew about some of this (I've read Moriarty's description of the JJ Abrams script, and also a pretty lousy Kevin Smith script for Superman Lives), but I had no idea of the sheer mass of bad ideas that have gone into this thing. What particularly worries me is that this post is only two months old. I thought Superman Returns was a clean break from these rejected plans -- if it has anything to do with them, I'll be a lot less optimistic.
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 01-09-2006, 10:34 PM
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I don't think you could make stuff like that up. To echo Zeke, wow.
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