Top Ten List of... - Step 1:See Topic. Step 2:create list

[Alexia]

Top Ten Ways TopHatMan would mess up any Trek series

Did that disappear then? Err...*doesnt know which one to add to*

[explodes] :shock: [/explodes]

[Vedra]

No,I just wasn't paying attention...I made that post when I was really tired,lol.

[Opium]

Top Ten Ways TopHatMan would mess up any Trek series

10. His top hat would make him look like Abe Lincoln, and Kirk has already enough of him!

9. His chilli jokes would really unnerve Porthos, which would in turn unnerve Archer, and Archer would make a mistake, like hanging around with Alien Nazis...erm, wait...so THAT"S what happened!

8. Janeway would fire Chakotay, as TopHatMan has, amazingly, even LESS personality than Chakotay, and Janeway likes her men of the "yes" variety. :wink:

7. Jedzia Dax would pick TopHatMan, and this would cause Worf, Quark, and Bashir to try and kill themselves.

6. TopHatMan would invite John along to the fight against the Dominion, and in one hour, the Dominion would be killed by the millions of incarnations of John and TopHatMan.

[Nic Corelli]

5. In Storm Front, Part II, it will be revealed that the Evil Future Guy is actually TOP HAT MAN! I knew all along! :twisted:

4. It would also be revealed that the Evil Future Guy is taking orders from someone even deeper in the future, the 56th Century, for example, which means the Evil Future Guy has his own superior Evil Future Guy. This would provide for the triumphant return of the Temporal Cold War in the middle of season 4.

3. Fuelled by the incredible popularity and ratings spike thanks to the unbelievable plot twists regarding Top Hat Man The Evil Future Guy and his superior, the Evil Evil Future Guy, Enterprise would get renewed for seasons 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 and 10. A very own Enterprise spin-off would launch, Star Trek: Enterprise: Temporal Enterprise, where it would be revealed that the Evil Future Guy (Top Hat Man) and the Evil Evil Future Guy are ACTUALLY taking orders from Evil Evil Evil Future Guy from the 79th Century.

2. The ratings for Enterprise skyrocket, making it the Number One Highest Rated Series of All Time. The show also wins ALL the Emmys, all the Golden Globes and the Tox Uthat. A second Enterprise spin-off, Star Trek: Enterprise: The Adventures of Porthos, is commissioned. The original Enterprise enters season 14, creatively and ratings-wise stronger than ever.

1. After the shocking Enterprise season 18 finale, "Really Big Nasty Storm With Some Mean Rain Front, Part 7", it is revealed that the FOURTH Evil Future Guy, supposedly from the 106th Century, DOES not exist! The audience is severely disappointed, and Enterprise, Enterprise: Temporal Enterprise and Enterprise: The Adventures of Porthos are cancelled (since Archer was already 66, even better, actually). The sixth Trek series is launched, with Jennifer Aniston as a Cardassian Captain and an unknown non-speaking extra as her Breen First Officer, gender undetermined. There is some sexual tension, but the show is deemed derivative of the never-again-paralleled Enterprise: The Porthos Adventures, and the Star Trek franchise ends in disgrace after 53 years.

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NOW do you see what kind of damage would John and Top Hat Man cause? Let go of them already! STELLAAAAAA!


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NEXT - Top Ten Ideas for the 6th Star Trek Series

[Opium]

10. Star Trek: The Adventures of TopHatMan and John: In the DS9 AU, John and TopHatMan become the ubersupremeultra Prime Minister Emperors due to their lack of dying. :wink:

9. Star Trek: Deep Space 9:The Next Generation Jake is the narrator of this series which documents Sisko coming back after 30 years; the happenings of Ezri and Bashir, as Ezri deals with the upcoming loss of her husband; Quark dates woman after woman, talking about nothing; and Kira is so distraught she marries Morn.

[admiral sab]

8. Bon Voyager: The french have taken over the ship called Voyager and everyone speaks with a British accent.

7. Star Trek the Pre Prequel: Set in the time of early starships. Before warp drive was invented. Ok it's about NASA and the moon landing! William Shatner would guest star as himself.

6. Star Trek Return of the King: In an amazing ploy the King from Lord of the Rings makes his debut as Captain Aewoyn. (Isn't that his name?) and the elf is his first officer. The doctor is the girl elf. Frodo is the chief engineer with best bud Comm officer Samwise at his side. Of course Seven of Nine makes all kinds of cameo appearances.

5. Star Trek: Seven of Nine. (It had to be done.)

4. Star Trek meets the X-Men: Yep you guessed it! Ratings will be soaring! (they wrote a book about it, why not a series!) Patrick Stewart will of course be playing Captain Picard and Mr. X - who knew that Picard had another clone?

3. Star Trek: Evil Future Guy revealed

Yep they finally figure out who it is!

2. Star Trek: Evil Alien Nazis
they decide it would be worth the risk to just do a series about evil alien Nazis!

1. Star Trek: Borg

We just can't get enough of em! Oh wait we already did this series! we called it Voyager though!

[Opium]

admiral sab, you forgot to post a new subject!

Nevermind! This list was never finished!

Top Ten Weirdest 'Ships Ever Mentioned

6. Quark/Any woman
5. 17/Zeke
4. John/TopHatMan
3. Rom/Leeta...no, wait...
2. Picard/anyone but Crusher!
1. Data/Toaster :lol:

(yes, I know Data/Toaster is my own creation, but I like it anyway)

Top Ten Really Wrong Eps of Any Trek Show

[Alexia]

Real eps or made up ones? If its real then definatly,

10. Unforgettable - God that ep sucked. Maybe it was just me. But it was on as a repeat on SkyOne the other day and my Mum said, "Oh, I don't remember this one." Point made I think...:wink:

[Opium]

Real eps, made up eps...it's all good

[admiral sab]

9. Threshold- even Braga regrets it!

8. Persistence of Vision- Could do without that C/T moment, thanks.

7. Twilight

6. Any Season 2 Enterprise Eps.

5. Elogium

[Scooter]

4. “Data’s Colonoscopy” – Geordi would rather be swallowing sharp pieces of glass than what he really has to do, which is investigate certain ... problems ... with Data’s functioning. B-plot: Crusher and Picard almost have a conversation.

3. “The Relief” – After years of erotic tension, everyone on board the NX-01 has sex over and over until they just plumb get tuckered out. Now able to function properly as Starfleet officers, the crew goes back to work and within a few short weeks resolves all the nagging subplots and pointless dangling questions of the last three seasons. Time travel is finally abolished, Vulcan unvulcanness is decreed illogical, and everyone’s happy – except Malcolm, who, for some reason, found the whole experience strangely unfulfilling.

2. “The Debate” – The Voyager crew spend fifty minutes in the briefing room arguing over whether to go straight or turn right. At the end of the episode someone presses the reset button, and no one remembers that they found out they were supposed to go left all along. The debate starts all over again.

1. “Ball’s Eye” – An entire episode of Deep Space 9 from the perspective of Sisko’s baseball. Includes a riveting subspace conversation with Starfleet supply over unaccountably delayed shipments of corbomite, which Sisko has requisitioned for defense of the space station; six separate reprimands of Bashir for whistling while other people are trying to work; and a privileged view of Sisko’s strategies for gaining the highest level in Halo XLI. In a delightful closer, after Sisko goes to bed and all the lights in Ops are dimmed, we learn that Rumpelstiltskin lives under a floorboard in Sisko’s office and never really left the station at all.



NEXT:

Dax's Most Interesting Exes From All Her Lives

[Hotaru]

Dax's Most Interesting Exes From All Her Lives

10. Hillary Clinton

9. Worf's great-great grandfather -- Worf -- who looks identical to modern Worf

8. Curzons Mother

7. TopHatMan, who after several dates of wandering around the mall dazed and confused she broke up with, stealing his Hat in the process.

6. Micheal Moore whom later made a documentary entitled "Aliens are real! AND BUSH KNOWS!"

5. Pretending to be French, Dax married a human girl, and started the Picard line. His husband never understood why his accent was british.

4. Bashir - but she'd never tell

3. 17

2. The inventor of telemarketing. He mysteriously disappeared a few days later, and Dax conveniently died.

1. Gatac, whom she painted dots on to fulfill his wish of having them.

Next - Top Ten Trek sitcom ideas

[Opium]

B-plot: Crusher and Picard almost have a conversation.

we learn that Rumpelstiltskin lives under a floorboard in Sisko’s office and never really left the station at all.

Love it!

5. Pretending to be French, Dax married a human girl, and started the Picard line. His husband never understood why his accent was british.

4. Bashir - but she'd never tell

Also love it!


And now...
Top Ten Trek sitcom ideas

10. Dax and Bashir: Documenting the lives of Bashir's funny attempts to get Dax to love him. But, as Dax is Trill, she can not love him. Of course, in the end, Ezri does.

9. Spin UN: Picard is a French diplomat in the UN. Dr. Crusher is the American medical advisor. They both went to university at Harvard, and after twenty years meet up again, only now, since Dr Crusher is a widow, Picard has a chance...and Dr Crusher can reveal her true feelings for him!

8. Quark's: Quark runs a quirky bar where everyone knows your name. Morn is always there to nod reassuringly; Rom always has some useless info to tell; and Odo is the cop whos only pleasure is to bug Quark, until he meets the dashing DA named Kira...

[Hotaru]

did my top ten list idea kill this thread? :cry:

[NAHTMMM]

Nahhh, it's just a lull


7. Forty-Seven Rules for Flying My Ship: Picard's determined to keep Wesley Crusher AND Deanna Troi away from the helm, even if it means making up absurd "rules" for who gets to sit in the pilot's seat.

[Scooter]

Another one of my long-winded lists.

6. “The Golden Boys” – Admiral Paris, Joe Sisko, Boothby, and Ambassador Spock move to a condo in Miami Beach and there enjoy some Centrum Silver moments. An even older member of the household adds extra spice, in the form of 300-year-old Admiral McCoy, who forgets every day that the “green-blooded son of a spork” he spends most of his time muttering about is his own roommate.

5. “Quark” – After he loses his bar, Quark finds himself the captain of a spacefaring garbage barge. His cohorts include a “transmute” with male and female characteristics, a highly-evolved plant-man named Ficus, Andy the Android, and Betty and Betty, who were always arguing over who was the clone of the other. Unceremoniously canceled and remembered only by those who obsess on TV/sci-fi trivia.

4. “Odo & Lwaxana” – Odo hangs out his shingle as a professional constable in New York, but spends most of his time palling around with his best friend Lwaxana, along with his flamboyant sidekick and her shrill secretary. Try as he might, Odo can’t find anyone “like him” to date, though he takes solace that the love life of man-hungry Lwaxana is even worse. At least they know that at the end of the day, they have their bitter, acerbic wisecracks.

3. “AfterTrek” – With “Next Generation” canceled, some of the bit players decide they want to keep their characters going. “AfterTrek” features Ensign Ro, Gowron, Nurse Ogawa, and Spot the Cat all ending up at Starbase Z97, bickering with each other, resolving minor emergencies, and trying desperately to ignore the gaping holes in their ensemble.

2. “The Powers of Julian Bashir” – On his 40th birthday Julian’s tweaked generic coding suddenly gives him uncanny “powers,” including the ability to accurately predict whether they’re in a Sisko-Gets-Angry episode or a Kira-Gets-Angry episode; the ability to visit the wormhole aliens and select which show they appear as characters from; and the ability to give O’Brien a “hotfoot” without the use of any matches whatsoever.

1. “I Love Beverly” – Zany hijinx ensue when the madcap redhead spins one scheme after another to get her own ship, despite the stolid interference of her foreigner husband, Jean-Luc Picard (played by a real-life foreigner himself!). When Beverly comes home after yet another medical starship has breeched its core, this wacky housefrau knows she’s got some “explaining” to do!


Next:
Top-Ten Little-Known Trek Celebrity Cameos

[mudshark]

Originally Posted by Scooter

5. “Quark” – After he loses his bar, Quark finds himself the captain of a spacefaring garbage barge. His cohorts include a “transmute” with male and female characteristics, a highly-evolved plant-man named Ficus, Andy the Android, and Betty and Betty, who were always arguing over who was the clone of the other. Unceremoniously canceled and remembered only by those who obsess on TV/sci-fi trivia.

Heh.

[Opium]

Top-Ten Little-Known Trek Celebrity Cameos

Real or made-up? Considering this is the Top 10 list, and not the Top 7, I shall assume made-up is okay. :lol:


10.TNG: Gambit of the Tombs: Searching for evidence of a higher culture on the Planet Inp'Ropa'Blepl'Ot, Picard runs into a strange, careless man named Indiana Jones who seems to have no real knowledge of archeologist digs, tries to seduce Dr. Crusher, and claims Councillor Troi is a Commie because of her accent. Guest star Harrison Ford.

9. DS9: Apocalypse Now Rising: Kurtzron of Klingon High Command, is suspected of being a changling. The Defiant must help get Cpt. Benjamin Willard to the Klingon High Council. However, on the way, Bashir tries to save a puppy, Rom is trigger-happy, and Quark talks a little to much about mixing drinks. Guest starring Martin Sheen.

8. TNG: Dark Page: Luxanna collapses, and only SpiderMan's girlfriend, Mary Jane Watson, can save her! Guest Star: Kirsten Dunst. No, really. Look it up.

7. TNG: Attached: Picard and Crusher are strangly linked, yet nothing can happen, because some obnoxious woman named Anya keeps butting into their relationship. Guest Star:Emma Caulfield (Buffy's Anya, will make sense to X/W's)

[Opium]

Awww, come on, I tried, you guys try too!

[Hotaru]

6. TNG; Devils Due. Picard and Buffy must work together to stop the Devil from taking over a planet. Guest Star: Sarah Michelle Gellar

5. VOY; The Disease. Harry chooses a women over duty and threatens to give her up. In a sub-plot cut from the episode Ensign Jones tries to fix the warp core of the aliens ship, despite the fact that he's a tacticle officer. Guest Star: Jim Carrey.

4. DS9; Second Skin. Kira is kidnapped and some Cardassians try to convince her she is a Cardassian. Troi makes a brief appearance to slap her for stealing the base idea of Face of the Enemy. Guest Star: Mirina Sirtis

3. TNG; Tapestry. Picard goes back in time and changes his past, and tries to rekindle his romance with Lwaxana Troi. Guest star: Majel Barret.

2. ENT; Stormfront. Enterprise people do stuff in the past. Guest Star: The plot from every other Go-back-in-time episode.

1. ENT; Season 3. Enterprise must stop the Xindi from destroying the world. Archer goes crazy, T'pol goes crazy, Trip get's depressed. Other's are there. Guest Star: Anthony Montgomery

Next List: Top Ten dark secrets of 5MV forumgoers.