The Five-Minute Forums  

Go Back   The Five-Minute Forums > FiveMinute.net > 5MV Talk

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 02-12-2004, 11:13 PM
Cleopatra Cleopatra is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Poland
Posts: 4
Default

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Here is a fiver for the X-files episode “Rain King”. I figure there are some on this board who would appreciate a little Valentine treat in Fiver format during this time of the year.
- Cleopatra

Five Minute “Rain King”

By Anonymous

Shelia: Oh my snugglebugs is gonna be sooo happy I got him this card.
Daryl: No I’m not your big fat ass of a woman.
Shelia: I have a surprise for you!
Daryl: If it involves a news paper and you proclaiming our love throughout the world…you just lost me.
Shelia: Uh oh…

Shelia: I hate my life. I can’t live without Darryl.
Darryl: Where’s that last can of beer…wait…oh damn! [car crashes]
Audience: Is the Author trying to parallel something here?
Author: Nah, just a coincidence that the story is told this way. Maybe.

Credits..

Mulder: Don’t you like private planes Scully.
Scully: Don’t look at me, this was your idea.
Mulder: Hey a fiver is NOT supposed to quote the show.
Scully: Meh. This is like parodying a parody.

Mayor: Welcome to Kroener!
Scully: It’s the boonies.
Mulder: I love the boonies.
Mayor: Don’t we all?

Scully: Next thing you’re gonna tell me, Zeke is going to make it rain hearts on TrekToday.
Mulder: Have you ever heard of SAD Scully?
Scully: Yeah, Mulder you’re one sad puppy.
Mulder: You wound me.
Scully: What was that about quoting the show itself?

Cindy: The FBI?
Mulder: We’re here to see the King.
Scully: *GLARE*
Mulder: Sorry. This show fiver’s itself.
Scully: Maybe we should get back to the plot?
Mulder: Yeah…weather station.

Shelia: Look! Love birds!
Scully: Well I’ll be damn, the ‘Shippers followed us in here too
ShipperChick: Hi folks! We’re not obsessed, just focused!
Scully: And I’m the blessed Virigin Mary. Can I hear something new?
ShipperChick: You turn out to be her twin?
Scully: Sorry I asked.

Holman: Well you see a ‘weather bomb’ usually forms over the east coast of the US traveling up through Newf-
Mulder: Does Daryl do a rain dance?
Holman: Well…no…
Mulder: Can you do a rain dance for me?
Scully: *glare*
Mulder: Ok…forget about it.

Scully: So here we are in the boonies. These people are nutties Mulder.
Mulder: Then we fit right in.
Farmer: It’s the KING!
Mulder: I get this warm tingly feeling all over when someone says that.
Scully: That’s just…no comment Mulder.
Daryl: *does the macarana*
Scully: I’m not witnessing this.
Rain: BOOMMM!
Mulder: I gotta get my dance mix 95 CD out again….

Shelia: Going to the high school reunion?
Holman: YES! Wanna be my date?
Shelia: No…I want Daryl.
Holman: But But But…
Shelia: What? You’re in love with me NOW?
Holman: …..

Cow: Moo.
Mulder: Moo.
Cow: Uh oh.
Mulder: Uh oh.
Cow: CRASH!

Mulder: Scully I have a boo boo.
Scully: Aw.
Shelia: I am the COW killer! I miss Darryl!
Scully: Aw.
Sheriff: That Boozer?
Holman: Uh oh…

Darryl: Oh the lovely rain.
Cindy: I love you.
Rain: *silence*
Darryl: My rain!
Cindy: He didn’t hear a word I said.

Mulder: Holman’s controlling the weather.
Scully: That’s like saying Archer will sleep with T’Pol…or Janeway with Chakotay…we all know the money’s on the cleavage!
Mulder: Eh?
Scully: Just pointing out to you how trivial this case is.

Holman: Lets practice my ‘I love you speech’ to Shelia again.
Shelia: Hi Holman!
Holman: It’s a curse I tell you!
Shelia: I have forgotten about Darryl! I mean look at that Agent Mulder!
Holman: Insult to injury.

Mulder: Spill the beans to her bud.
Holman: But I’ve been holding it in for so long!
Mulder: Here’s some prunes if that’ll help.
Holman: You’re full of poo.
Mulder: Scully don’t call me Poppyhead for nothin’.

Cindy: We don’t need money if we got love.
Darryl: How dense can you be exactly?
Cindy: I dunno, I’m the bimbo of the week, hehe.

Mulder: Just go through that door, and tell her.
Holman: But it’s been so long! I don’t know what she’ll say!
Mulder: I don’t know…start with…’hey’?
Holman: You’re just full of good advice aren’t you?

Holman: I love you Shelia.
Shelia: Oh Holman that’s so sweet. Now I wonder where I can find that Agent Mulder…
Holman: Maybe I should just kill myself now, and make it easier on everyone.

Darryl: I want Shelia back!
Holman: Figures.
Shelia: Well I don’t want you! I want Mulder!
Mulder: Buh…
Darryl: That Grey T-shirt wearing Spooky thing?
Shelia: Hmm yeah.

Shelia: Thanks for protecting me Agent Mulder *kiss*
Mulder: This is becoming an occupational hazard. Is there a planetary alignment again?

Scully: This place is gonna float away.
Mulder: I’ll build the arc, you gather the animals.
Scully: *glare*
Mulder: I was kidding! I swear my dialogue in this script is pure fiver material!

Scully: Mulder believes Holman is making it rain.
Shelia: You love him don’t you?
Scully: No, he keeps running off on me, but I believe if you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were. When loving someone never regret what you do. Only regret what you didn't do.
Shelia: Well gee, you’re deep tonight.
Scully: Don’t blame me blame the writer.

Shelia: Are you the weather man?
Holman: Baby I can be your weather man!
Shelia: That’s so sweet.
Darryl: But what about me?
Shelia: Baby, you lost your chance long ago!

Mulder: Well, our job is done.
Scully: We’re getting to old for this ‘Shipper business.
Mulder: Kiss me and get it over with?
Scully: No.

----[/color:post_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 02-12-2004, 11:28 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Whoa...

I am suddenly reminded of how long its been since I watched an episode of X-Files.

I remember this one... vaguely. I was a bit lost at parts, because I don't remember most of the episode very well, but I remember the teaser well enough, wish the car crash and the falling heart-hailstones...

I'm not sure why we're getting such an influx of newcomers, but hey, I'm the last one to complain! Hi there, Cleo

BTW, if you're interested in writing fivers for the actual site, and not just to amuse the handful of forum regulars, you should of course contact Zeke, as explained in the Sci-Fivers FAQ (which is indeed the catergory under which the X-Files fall), and the Submission FAQ. (Hint: the second one is the important one.)

Thanks, welcome, and happy Valentine's Day![/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 02-13-2004, 05:11 AM
Naki's Avatar
Naki Naki is offline
This forum's least pornographic Naruto content yet
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 164
Send a message via AIM to Naki Send a message via MSN to Naki Send a message via Yahoo to Naki Send a message via Skype™ to Naki
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]yeah me too on the whole long time no watch the last one i saw was about an invisible elephant i think[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The Zeke has faltered. You must bring the Restoration...The time of the Reckoning is at hand. It is the end...Or the beginning.

The user formerly known as Itachi
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 02-13-2004, 04:28 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,396
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Thanks for pointing out the FAQs, Standback. That's exactly how to handle a situation like this -- normally. However, I happen to know who "Cleopatra" is, and she knows the rules. She's just not used to playing by mine or anyone else's.

"Rain King" is one of the few [iost_uid0]X-Files[/iost_uid0] I've seen, so I knew what was going on at least. But just for the record, no [iost_uid0]way[/iost_uid0] would I make it rain hearts on TrekToday.

Invisible elephants?[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 02-13-2004, 04:41 PM
Cleopatra Cleopatra is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Poland
Posts: 4
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Don't be too hard on him Zeke, he was just doing his job.

But yeah, I'm *very* familiar wtih Zeke and his order of the universe - I'm also very good at throwing him off his throne from time to time

And its not that hard to make it rain hearts....javascript...a animated heart .gif...a little hacking.....

Hmm maybe I can do it....

*veg*

But. The question is. Did Zeke *understand* the fiver.



Cleo[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 02-13-2004, 04:58 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,396
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[quoteost_uid0="Cleopatra"][color=#000000ost_uid0]Don't be too hard on him Zeke, he was just doing his job.[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0]Hard on him? Not at all. He did good. He had no way of knowing who you were. So in case I wasn't clear enough, thanks, Standback.

[quoteost_uid0]And its not that hard to make it rain hearts....javascript...a animated heart .gif...a little hacking.....
Hmm maybe I can do it....
*veg*[/quoteost_uid0]

I don't doubt you can -- but if it happens now, we'll know who did it, won't we?

[quoteost_uid0]But. The question is. Did Zeke *understand* the fiver.[/quoteost_uid0]

Yep. It's about invisible elephants. I think they're distant.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 02-13-2004, 05:01 PM
Cleopatra Cleopatra is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Poland
Posts: 4
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Damn, you're gonna force me to go back and read that ep aren't you.

I wonder if LauraJo is around...it would be far easier that way...

I'm SUCH a bad um...[title unnamed just in case] I will go back and read...

Lake George right?

Cleo[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 02-13-2004, 05:06 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,396
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]No no, I just think the phrase "distant elephants" is funny. It's not really a reference.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 02-13-2004, 05:10 PM
Cleopatra Cleopatra is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Poland
Posts: 4
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]But the elephants are still distant?

My..I may have to send out my stampead[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 02-13-2004, 10:54 PM
PointyHairedJedi's Avatar
PointyHairedJedi PointyHairedJedi is offline
He'd enjoy a third pie
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: The Scotlands
Posts: 4,354
Send a message via ICQ to PointyHairedJedi Send a message via AIM to PointyHairedJedi Send a message via Yahoo to PointyHairedJedi
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][Grumby Man]My brain hurts.[/GM][/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images.
Sergeant: You can? That's amazing!
Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'.
- Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!)

"Everybody loves pie!"
- Spongebob Squarepants
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 03-13-2004, 11:08 PM
Scooter's Avatar
Scooter Scooter is offline
Doctoral candidate
Staff
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Earth, again
Posts: 831
Send a message via AIM to Scooter
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0="Cleopatra"]But the elephants are still distant?

My..I may have to send out my stampead[/quoteost_uid0]
Q. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill?
A. Here come the elephants over the hill.
Q. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill?
A. Here come the grapes over the hill. (She was colorblind.)


Q. Why did the elephant wear green tennis shoes?
A. So he could walk across pool tables without being seen.


Q. How can you tell an elephant's in bed with you?
A. By the "E" on his pajamas.


Q. How can you tell an elephant is hiding in your refrigerator?
A. By his footprints in the butter.


Q. How do you get down off an elephant?
A. You don't get down off an elephant, you get down off a duck.


Q. Why do ducks have flat feet?
A. To stamp out forest fires.
Q. Why do elephants have flat feet?
A. To stamp out flaming ducks.



Phew, all that was blocked up. I feel much better now. [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
An updated list of all my online writing can be found here. Check it out.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 03-14-2004, 12:18 AM
Nic Corelli's Avatar
Nic Corelli Nic Corelli is offline
Wigging out
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Zagreb, Croatia
Posts: 925
Send a message via ICQ to Nic Corelli
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]When I was a kid, my parents took me to the circuis and I got to ride an elephant.

Few weeks later, in the same circuis, elephant went crazy and people fell down from him. It was very likely the same elephant.

Really, [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
\"Lord Eddard Stark is a proud, honourable, honest man, and his lady wife is worse.\"


~A Game of Thrones, book one of Song of Ice and Fire
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:01 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.