The Five-Minute Forums  

Go Back   The Five-Minute Forums > FiveMinute.net > Fiver By Committee
Register FAQ Community Calendar Today's Posts Search

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 02-09-2004, 07:02 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,405
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Morpheus and Neo rejoin the others, who are heading for a building to leave the Matrix. As they climb the stairs, Neo sees a cat walk past -- twice. "Déjà vu," he remarks. That stops the others cold, because déjà vu, as Trinity explains, is usually the result of a glitch in the Matrix caused when the Agents change something. What they changed turns out to be the building -- its windows are now bricked up and its phone line is cut. Mouse is killed guarding the phone itself. As the Agents enter the building, Morpheus has an idea, and leads the team to the building's wetwall. Apoc hands Neo a gun, speaking his cool line ("I hope the Oracle gave you some good news.")

One to three scenes for this block, scene length being inversely proportional to how many we have. The synopsis is here. And now, new rules!

I've decided it's time to put an actual mechanism in place to make FBC go faster. So here's how it'll work for the next couple of blocks: for three days you guys propose possible scenes and work on them. On the fourth day, the vote is called (unless enough people feel we need more time). Each poster is allowed to vote for one scene not written by him. I may or may not vote, but I won't propose scenes; the other staffers can do as they will.

If this doesn't work out, we won't continue with it. But I've had enough complaints about the speed of this thing that it was time to get it on a schedule. We'll try this and see how it goes.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
  #2  
Old 02-09-2004, 08:21 PM
Sa'ar Chasm's Avatar
Sa'ar Chasm Sa'ar Chasm is offline
Our last, best hope for peace
Staff
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sitting (in Ottawa)
Posts: 3,425
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]*rummages through previous blocks, coughs and chokes on the dust*

[quoteost_uid0]I know an even better place for the Blue Screen of Death joke.

In the scene where there is a "glitch" in the matrix, which leads to Morpheus' capture. [/quoteost_uid0]

Now if only I could remember what the Blue Screen of Death joke was.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them.
  #3  
Old 02-09-2004, 09:27 PM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,970
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: Hey, I just saw the same black cat scurry by twice. Do you think someone's messing with the Matrix?
Morpheus: Nah, it's probably just a recursive temporal causality loop.
Neo: What in the world is [iost_uid0]*that*[/iost_uid0]?
Morpheus: I can't tell you. Temporal Prime Directive.
Neo: Whoa, deja vu!
Helicopter: Actually, Neo was right. For once.
Morpheus: Aw, nuts.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
  #4  
Old 02-09-2004, 10:45 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Now if only I could remember what the Blue Screen of Death joke was.[/quoteost_uid0]
Ziv the Remarkable Procrastinator to the rescue! It was in block 10:
[quoteost_uid0]Neo: We're in a computer?
Morpheus: Is that so hard to believe? Watch what happens when I try to do two things at once (White space turns blue)
Neo: 200 years in the future and you're *still* using Windows ME? [/quoteost_uid0]

Over here, it maybe can work as something like this:

[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Hey, isn't that the cat that was here a minute ago?
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] Uh-oh. The cat's taking to long to load. There's a glitch in Matrix.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] What's that mea-- Hey, why'd everything turn blue?
[bost_uid0]Matrix:[/bost_uid0] Fatal exception at 1337-a743f07r42.pirate.Nebuchadnezzer.link?id=Morpheus. Please reboot universe. Have a nice day.[/colorost_uid0]

__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #5  
Old 02-09-2004, 10:50 PM
catalina_marina's Avatar
catalina_marina catalina_marina is offline
Surfin' you say?
Member
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: North-West of the South-East of Nowhere.
Posts: 4,949
Send a message via ICQ to catalina_marina Send a message via AIM to catalina_marina Send a message via MSN to catalina_marina Send a message via Yahoo to catalina_marina
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Ohh, I like it! :lol:[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
~Bachelor of Science Marijke

I'm not the devil, I just work for her.

What spoon? There is no spoon. According to Zeke, it's a cat. ~NeoMatrix

"Apparently we're on the wrong side. Or the right side if you like winning." ~Spike

Sa'ar Chasm: Too far south you hit Belgium.
catalina marina: Not in Limburg you don't.
Sa'ar Chasm: You do if you go south in the right way.
  #6  
Old 02-09-2004, 10:53 PM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,970
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]^^Stupid dial-up. I hope Morpheus had already reached a save point when that happened [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
  #7  
Old 02-09-2004, 11:14 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] That's funny. I thought I saw the same cat twice.
[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] Perhaps they'd like to join our mountaineering expidition.

[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Whoa - deja vu...
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] What was that?
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Whoa - deja vu...
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] What was that?

[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Whoa - that cat looked exactly the same as the cat that just walked by...
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] Uh-oh. Red alert, everybody - fire at will!
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] ...except for the big white stripe...

[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] Guarding, guarding, lalalalala...
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] Red alert, Mouse - Neo saw two cats. I repeat, [iost_uid0]two cats.[/iost_uid0]
[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] Oh no! The door's walled shut!
[bost_uid0]Heavily Armed Agents:[/bost_uid0] The door's on this side, stupid.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #8  
Old 02-10-2004, 01:10 AM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,970
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]^[iost_uid0]"THERE . . . ARE . . . TWO . . . CATS!"[/iost_uid0]



Mouse: Oh, no! The windows are all blocked up!
Morpheus: Next time, let's set up in a building that [iost_uid0]isn't[/iost_uid0] abandoned and condemned.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
  #9  
Old 02-10-2004, 03:39 AM
Pteryx's Avatar
Pteryx Pteryx is offline
Spritely
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Auburn, ME
Posts: 73
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: Whoa, cool, this really [iost_uid0]is[/iost_uid0] like a video game! When you leave a room and re-enter it, creatures like that cat respawn!
Trinity: Uh, that never happens unless the Agents change something in the Matrix.
Neo: You mean there are Gameshark codes too?![/colorost_uid0]
  #10  
Old 02-10-2004, 03:44 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: Hey! That cat is lagging seriously on this matrix server.
Trinity: He must be logged in using a router.

Mouse: This is my big scene.
*gets the big machine guns out*
Mouse: DIE! DIE! DIE! GAK!
Solder: Heh, the lagging cat got em good.

Agent Smith: They are on the 47th floor
Agent Brown: The elevator is broke.
Agent Smith: Find someone to morph into on that floor.
Agent Brown: There isnt anyone.
Agent Smith: Who designed this building anyway?
Agent Brown: You did.[/colorost_uid0]
  #11  
Old 02-10-2004, 07:09 AM
Gatac's Avatar
Gatac Gatac is offline
Man in the iron mask
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Magdeburg, Germany
Posts: 667
Send a message via ICQ to Gatac Send a message via AIM to Gatac
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Why are there two cats?
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] There is no cat.

[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] Hey, there was a door here last time I played this level...
[bost_uid0]SWAT Team:[/bost_uid0] That's what you get for camping.
[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] Just wait until I respawn, and I'll kick your rear twelve different flavours of hell!
[bost_uid0]SWAT Team:[/bost_uid0] This is Last Man Standing, remember?
[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] Oh no! Anyone but Bruce Willis! GAK!

[bost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/bost_uid0] It is a day so long in coming I am uncertain how to celebrate it.
[bost_uid0]Agent Brown:[/bost_uid0] Perhaps...a quiet chuckle.
[bost_uid0]Agent Smith: [/bost_uid0] Very well. Let us...chuckle.

(Apoc hands Neo a pistol.)
[bost_uid0]Apoc:[/bost_uid0] If you shoot yourself in the foot and cry like a baby, they might ignore you.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] I don't know what's worse - that you're suggesting it or that I'm considering it.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Katy: Can I have the skill 'drive car off bridge and have parachute handy'?
Justin: It's kind of a limited skill.
Greg: Depends on how often you drive off bridges.
- d02 Quotes
  #12  
Old 02-10-2004, 11:16 AM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Weird - that same cat just walked by twice.
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] Oh, no! That means they're making changes to the Matrix!
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Like... adding in another cat?

[quoteost_uid0]Agent Smith: It is a day so long in coming I am uncertain how to celebrate it.
Agent Brown: Perhaps...a quiet chuckle.
Agent Smith: Very well. Let us...chuckle.[/quoteost_uid0]

I liked this one a lot. [/colorost_uid0]

__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #13  
Old 02-10-2004, 05:25 PM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,970
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Me too. I'm sure it's meant as a reference that I don't recognize, but it's just so goofy...



Neo: If you see a feline walk past you, and then you see the same feline do it again, is that a sign you're about to experience a catastrophe?
Morpheus: It is if you're being hunted cat-and-mouse. Speaking of which, I want to make a phone call. Get me Mouse.
Mouse: The windows are sealed--GAK!
Agents: Yes, they are.
Morpheus: Drat, too late. Mouse just went catatonic.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
  #14  
Old 02-10-2004, 06:49 PM
Gatac's Avatar
Gatac Gatac is offline
Man in the iron mask
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Magdeburg, Germany
Posts: 667
Send a message via ICQ to Gatac Send a message via AIM to Gatac
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]It's a Transformers reference. More specifically, two Quintessons utter it in Five Faces of Darkness.

I didn't have more than a fuzzy memory of finding that hilarious, but luckily, there are good quote lists for that cartoon.

Gatac[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Katy: Can I have the skill 'drive car off bridge and have parachute handy'?
Justin: It's kind of a limited skill.
Greg: Depends on how often you drive off bridges.
- d02 Quotes
  #15  
Old 02-10-2004, 08:02 PM
JobeGDG JobeGDG is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: The Aquinas Router.
Posts: 25
Send a message via AIM to JobeGDG
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0="Gatac"][bost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/bost_uid0] It is a day so long in coming I am uncertain how to celebrate it.
[bost_uid0]Agent Brown:[/bost_uid0] Perhaps...a quiet chuckle.
[bost_uid0]Agent Smith: [/bost_uid0] Very well. Let us...chuckle.[/quoteost_uid0]
I liked this one a lot, too.

This is sort of a revision of Standback'sÂ…

[bost_uid0]Neo[/bost_uid0]: Hey, a black cat! Hey, a black cat!
[bost_uid0]Trinity[/bost_uid0]: Oh no! They're making changes to the Matrix!
[bost_uid0]Neo[/bost_uid0]: Like adding another cat? That's a lot of back luckÂ…
[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] GAK!
[bost_uid0]Neo[/bost_uid0]: See?[/colorost_uid0]

__________________
94143243431512659321054872390486828512913474876027
67195923460238582958304725016523252592969157276553
64363462727184012012643147546329450127847264841075
62234789626728592858295347502772262646456217613984
829519475412398501
  #16  
Old 02-10-2004, 09:26 PM
Sa'ar Chasm's Avatar
Sa'ar Chasm Sa'ar Chasm is offline
Our last, best hope for peace
Staff
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sitting (in Ottawa)
Posts: 3,425
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]This refers to The Internet Oracle (nee The Usenet Oracle), and may be familiar to about three people. I meant to suggest it last scene, and completely forgot.

Morpheus (or whoever): I hope the Oracle gave you some good news.
Neo: I owe the Oracle a happy meal. She said it had better be singing and dancing.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them.
  #17  
Old 02-10-2004, 10:31 PM
Gatac's Avatar
Gatac Gatac is offline
Man in the iron mask
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Magdeburg, Germany
Posts: 667
Send a message via ICQ to Gatac Send a message via AIM to Gatac
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Revised:

[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Hey, an instant replay! Did I miss an action scene?
[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] The Matrix does not obey the laws of causality as you know them.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] So the action scene comes now?
[bost_uid0]Morpheus:[/bost_uid0] I hate it when you're right.

[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] Who tuned this wall in?
[bost_uid0]SWAT Guy:[/bost_uid0] Sleep. And lay down your guns.
[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] You can have my guns if you pry them out of my cold, dead hands!
[bost_uid0]SWAT Guy:[/bost_uid0] Your proposal...is acceptable.

(Leave the chuckle, since everyone seems to like it.)

(Apoc hands Neo a pistol.)
[bost_uid0]Apoc:[/bost_uid0] And remember, two bucks late fee, no exceptions.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Katy: Can I have the skill 'drive car off bridge and have parachute handy'?
Justin: It's kind of a limited skill.
Greg: Depends on how often you drive off bridges.
- d02 Quotes
  #18  
Old 02-11-2004, 04:55 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]One-liners for Mouse:

[bost_uid0]Mouse:[/bost_uid0] Omigod! It's a [iost_uid0]brick wall![/iost_uid0]

or:

[iost_uid0]Mouse's Log: Well, I got killed, which kinda sucks. But hey, I finally got to fire those cool machine guns. Go me![/iost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #19  
Old 02-11-2004, 05:01 PM
Sa'ar Chasm's Avatar
Sa'ar Chasm Sa'ar Chasm is offline
Our last, best hope for peace
Staff
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sitting (in Ottawa)
Posts: 3,425
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Agents: Surrender and die.
Mouse: We'll see about that, sugar.
Agents: How do you plan to defend yourself from bullets with a katana?

Reference, anyone? (Doesn't quite work, since the character being referenced is female and our Mouse is male)[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them.
  #20  
Old 02-11-2004, 06:11 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,405
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[quoteost_uid0="Sa'ar Chasm"][color=#000000ost_uid0]Reference, anyone?[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0]ReBoot?[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
Closed Thread


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 11:01 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.