Top Ten List of... - Step 1:See Topic. Step 2:create list

[Standback]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]4. The Take-No-Prisoners Alliance: Every single race in the Alpha Quadrant ganged up to wipe Wesley Crusher out of existence once and for all, but somehow missed, and the perp got away.
3. The Dome Minion Fiasco: Just when Captain Picard had finally achieved his lifelong dream of being awarded a personal entourage of servents to shine, buff and wax his glorious hairless head, an unfortunate choice of naming combined with a minor Starfleet intelligence failure led to the entire crew being destroyed by the [iost_uid0]U.S.S. Defiant[/iost_uid0].[/colorost_uid0]

[Opium]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]2. The TimeLine War: After 30+ years of running Vic Fontane's club in the holodeck, Bashir realizes it is the 2004 in the program, and discovers a strange website that has knowledge of the future, and instead of using it for good, they just make parodies of, and talk about some guys named John and TopHatMan instead of worshipping him. So, he destroys it, sending timewars across the timeline.[/colorost_uid0]

[Standback]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]1. War of the Unspeakable Records: Captain Archer declares battle on Denobulia an all surrounding territory when Phlox mentions his feature role in numerous decon videos. Deteriorates into huge quadrant-wide war, occupying much of 5th and 6th seasons. Later found out that Phlox was kidding.

Next up: I [iost_uid0]said[/iost_uid0] I wanted to see the forumgoers at it too...
Top Ten Haikus About Star Trek Captains[/colorost_uid0]

[Gatac]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]10.

Captain Jon Archer
He gets beat up too often
But feeds Porthos cheese

As can be seen above, I'm under the impression that it should be 17 syllables, not 17 words. (With a 5-7-5 ratio, and yes, I'm aware that it's not quite syllables in Japanese, but I figure it's close enough.) Kick my posterior if I'm wrong.

Gatac[/colorost_uid0]

[NeoMatrix]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]9.
Oh Captain Janeway
We are near a nebula
with coffee inside[/colorost_uid0]

[Alexia]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Benjamin Sisko
For Starfleet you do explore
But you never move

edit: BTW...there are only 5 captains. How do we do a top 10![/colorost_uid0]

[Gatac]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]7.

Jellico, he said
"No fish in the ready room!"
Riker mutinies.

(Like this, Alexia.)

Gatac[/colorost_uid0]

[Standback]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]...because duplicates are allowed?

Bonus points for whoever haikus Captain Mackenzie Calhoun. Because I feel like it.[/colorost_uid0]

[Gatac]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]6.

Mackenzie Calhoun
Never will we hear his voice
Fights only in books.

Is New Frontiers any good, Standback? I've seen a few books here and there, but I never bought one.

Gatac[/colorost_uid0]

[Standback]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Um.
Well, put it like this. Trek novels in general are not exactly quality literature. They're enjoyable light reads at the best, at worst, they really really suck. A whole lot of 'em really really suck. Furthermore, as I get farther and farther from the age of 15, I notice the flaws more and more.
But, for light reads, Peter David is a pretty good author. He's definitely one of the best Trek writers (and his Q-Squared is one of the few Trek books I actually do heartily recommend). He's got good writing style, keeps you interested, keeps everything fun and fast.
In New Frontier, he's done a nice job creating the novel equivalent of a new Trek series. Full crew of characters, all fleshed out very nicely. Typical space opera relationship goings-on (and Peter David often uses fairly gratitious romance and/or sex to hold attention - can anybody say Pon Farr? Peter can!), and a lot of story arcs that continue through the series. It's got its ups and downs - Peter David uses some cheap tricks to create interest and suspense at times, and that's never a fun thing to notice. You also pretty much need to read them in order, and in clumps, because you've actually got an ongoing story here that you need to follow, and each major 'chapter' is split up into a few books.

If you enjoy Trek books... then for Trek books, they're definitely good ones. If you're looking for a light read... or a series of light reads... New Frontier can definitely be a lot of fun sometimes. If you're looking for a really good book... neh.
Let me put it like this. I'm fortunate enough to have a friend who serially purchases every single Trek book, at no cost to me, and is happy to let me borrow them. I haven't made much use of this priviledge in the past two years, because my interest in the Trek books has lessened and I've had much better stuff to read, and also because I'm not home to borrow stuff very often. But hopping over and borrowing the more recent New Frontier books is vaguely on my to-do list... eventually... because I would like to read them.[/colorost_uid0]

[Gatac]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Well, I can read Shatner's stuff without flinching, so I guess I can take those, too, then. Unfortunately, I'm currently terminally ill with Spycraft fever, so any Trek book will have to wait until I've managed to get every last Spycraft/Shadowforce Archer/Whatever the hell they call their next campaign setting books.

Er...

5.

Picard at McDonald's
"A small Sprite and large French Fries?"
He says, "Make it so."

Gatac[/colorost_uid0]

[Alexia]

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Picard at McDonald's
"A small Sprite and large French Fries?"
He says, "Make it so."[/quoteost_uid0]

LOL :lol:

[quoteost_uid0]...because duplicates are allowed? [/quoteost_uid0] Oh yeah...dumb moment! [Dumb]Kicks self[/Dumb]

Please continue the hilarity [/colorost_uid0]

[taya17]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]*agrees wholeheartedly with Standback*

I used to adore Trek novels when I was, like, 14... and as I grew older and older I began to realize that most of them truly sucked, compared to the Hugo and Nebula prizewinners I was reading along with them. It has come to the point that I'm contemplating selling or at worst getting rid of large parts of my Trek novel collection to make space for the Balkan-interest books on my woefully cramped bookshelf. Shocking, I know.

On the other hand, Peter David is, by far, the best amongst the Trek novelists, and I enjoy both his Trek and non-Trek novels alike. Next to Terry Pratchett, he's about the only author who makes me unable to stop myself from laughing out loud on public transport. Never read the New Frontier series though: I'm far too lazy to follow serialized novels. Aside from Harry Potter, that is

Edit: Errr... I was supposed to continue with the Top 10 list, wasn't I?

Chakotay's face is
Permanently set into
A woodblock's grimace.[/colorost_uid0]

[Alexia]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Poor Captain Braxton
He travels through time and space
Janeway gets there first[/colorost_uid0]

[taya17]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]2:

Ransom wasn't bad
But his first mate could have used
A lot more Prozac.[/colorost_uid0]

[Gatac]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]And the Number One Haiku is:

1.
Jim Kirk is the man
He gets all the alien chicks
Spock raises eyebrows

I'm proud of the double meaning in the last line, too. Hooray for subtlety.

Next up: Top Ten New Timeslots of Enterprise (with nicknames, please)

Gatac[/colorost_uid0]

[NAHTMMM]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]New Frontier? Bleah. I gave up on those after about the sixth book...




Top Ten New Timeslots of Enterprise (oh drat, I need to get that anthology from downstairs at home to do this right)

10. The same timeslot as (pick a Law and Order series), aka the "Ant Trying to Stop a Locomotive" timeslot
9. The first Monday of each month at 3:40 AM, aka the "1-2-3-4" timeslot
8. 7:00 Wisconsin time, aka "Cheese Primetime" ( Porthos likes it! )[/colorost_uid0]

[Opium]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]7. Fridays, in Canada, at 8pm, against RCAF, Red Green, 22 Minutes: "The Only Night Canadians Watch Canadian TV en mass, and show set in space just won't cut it!"

6. Saturday, in Canada, 6pm: "You're watching Hockey or else you ain't Canadian, eh?

5. Thursday, against ER: "I think Enterprise is dead, Jim.

4. Thursday, against CSI: "DOA"[/colorost_uid0]

[Hotaru]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]3. Thursdays against Joey "Sequals never work out"

2. Weekdays at 2:00 "Soap Operas can have starships too!"

and I shall leave #1 for someone else[/colorost_uid0]

[Opium]

[color=#000000ost_uid0]1. Against DAYS: "We're doing it just to confuse Opium and Admiral Sab!"


Top Ten Trek Episodes that were Just To Wacky/Wierd/Wrong/Sexy/Boring/Controversial to be aired.[/colorost_uid0]