#261
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Hehehe. The S-word.[/colorost_uid0]
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#262
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]I do a double take every time I hear that word, regardless of the circumstances.[/colorost_uid0]
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Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants |
#263
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]me to, but concitering the crowd id say that in this case soon realy means soon.[/colorost_uid0]
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Vulcan children are never late with their Sehlat's dinner |
#264
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]I tend to say it very intentionally, but then realize the irony was lost on them.[/colorost_uid0]
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Benjamin Disraeli: You don't even know who I am! |
#265
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]I do that sometimes to like if someone asks when we're going to do something I really don't want to do, I just say "Soon" and laugh maniacally while they just look at me.[/colorost_uid0]
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Vulcan children are never late with their Sehlat's dinner |
#266
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]So you laugh maniacally in public too? I'm not alone then.[/colorost_uid0]
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Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants |
#267
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]No, not really. *evil gryn*[/colorost_uid0]
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#268
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]It always irks me when I say "soon" to people as a joke and they don't get it. Sigh. These sad, deprived people...[/colorost_uid0]
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#269
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[color=#000000ost_uid0][iost_uid0]"The Pies of Zetar"[/iost_uid0]
Zeke:  Hmm, "pies"? Maybe this one will actually be interesting... Mysterious Future Guy:  But NAH is writing it. Zeke:  Point. --Hey, who are you? And why are you driving Archer nuts? Who decided [iost_uid0]you[/iost_uid0] should be the only person who gets to have all the fun? MFG:  Sorry, different Future Guy. Now, shall we get to the plot already? Zeke:  Sure, but wait a sec. I feel a moral obligation to pick up all the forumgoers who fainted at the mention of a plot in a Baw fiver. PointyHairedJedi:  Check out this plot device I got real cheap at Christie's. Saxamaphone:  ...[iost_uid0](has to wait while the author runs off to Boogle in a fit of inspiration)[/iost_uid0]... Wouldn't that be less confusing if you just said "Google"? Anyway, that's a real nice picture of a, errr, umbrella thingy you've got there, PHJ. PHJ:  Oh, sorry, I have it upside down. It's really a picture of a broom. But how does this further the plot in a story about pies? Katy Jane:  maybe there's a secret mesage hidden somewhere on it? look! There under the artist's signature PHJ:  Wait a moment. What the frell are we doing squinting at a portrait of a broom? Isn't there a huge ZonK fleet coming to Earth? With Captain Galactic and Zuke in an orbiting starbase? Celeste:  Yeah, and I'm the Dictator of Earth or something! With Riley as First Dog! Yippee : D NAHTMMM:  Number one, please don't mention baddies, or even [iost_uid0]a[/iost_uid0] baddie, orbiting Earth in starbases. It brings back  :eyeroll: :madder: :dead:  memories of the last half of [iost_uid0]Death Orbit[/iost_uid0]. Number two, we're putting that storyline on hold for the moment. O'Pipp:  Will this [iost_uid0]new[/iost_uid0] storyline involve Jonas decapitation? NAH:  Um, I have no idea. Let's find out, OK? mudshark:  Could someone turn on the overhead lights for me? ...Thanks. ...This is hard to read. "Macoides"? "Mecaidcs?" Maybe that's Mercedes. ..."Tercorum"? Is that like a geological epoch or something? Derek:  I'm guessing that somebody misspelled "Trek forum". Anything else on there? mudshark:  There's some scribble out in front of all this, then at the end there's something about "satis Bee". Or "satis" something. NeoMatrix:  Maybe someone couldn't spell Marina Sirtis catalina marina:  *had been dozing, now starts* Huh? Zeke:  So who else is going to come with me to Zetar? Sa'ar Chasm:  I'm coming, just so I can get a line in somewhe--oh, wait. Never mind. Nan:  Heh.  Never a dull moment with you guys.  Marc:  Zeke? Doesn't the message tell us to drive a Mercedes around a Star Trek Board dedicated to Troi? Zeke:  No, that last, besides being part of the whole reference, must say "satisfy thee". That obviously refers to the pie satisfying I. Er, thee. I mean, me. The title of this is "Pies of Zetar". Not "Pies of TrekBBS" or "Pies of EFCL" or anything else. Ergo, we go to Zetar. Get it, Marc? ijd gaf:  Why should we trust this silly message anyway? [iost_uid0]Look[/iost_uid0] at this! The picture frame isn't even cedar! Zeke:  Well, here we are. Kira:  That was almost too quick. Zeke:  This is a fiver. MFG:  Written by NAHTMMM. Zeke:  Oh yeah. I guess that [iost_uid0]was[/iost_uid0] disturbingly quick then. Katy Jane:  why are we making fun of NAH? NAH:  Because it's fun! Katy Jane:  oookay then... ijd gaf:  You do realize that the entire planet of Zetar is a cloud of dust, right? Zeke:  Well, yeah. I was hoping that maybe a cookbook or something had survived the destruction though. Cookbook:  Yoo-hoo! Over here! PHJ:  Gotcha! Tractoring in... Zeke:  Good, let's get out of here quickly. These short scenes are creeping me out. I'm not even sure NAH actually wrote this. MPQ:  So the fact that a flimsy cookbook somehow survived the cataclysm that utterly destroyed the rest of its planet doesn't disturb you? Zeke:  Nope. This is a Baw fiver. What do you expect, realism? Zeke:  Let's have a look at this book. "How to Make a Pie Out of Any Food". Eh, I guess this might actually be useful. I still haven't found that old apple-and-tangerine pie recipe I lost a few years back. Jonas:  Millennia ago, the Zetar were renowned across the galaxy for their ability to make pies out of anything--so goes the legend. But their pies held a terrible curs--[iost_uid0][bost_uid0][color=redost_uid0]GAK![/colorost_uid0][/bost_uid0][/iost_uid0] :dead: Things Are Good:  "a terrible curs[iost_uid0][bost_uid0][color=redost_uid0]GAK[/colorost_uid0][/bost_uid0][/iost_uid0]"? O'Pipp:  (rubbing the blade of her Jonas Scyther of Doom absent-mindedly as she checks her watch) Twelve seconds?  How embarrassing.  I'm getting out of practice. Kira:  Frell, O'Pipp, don't you realize what you've done? You kept us from finding out what the dark secret of the Zetarian pies is! Now we're practically doomed to endure a sequel! O'Pipp:  Will I get to kill Jonas again? Kira:  No. Arzosah:  Mmm, pie.  ...What? You knew [iost_uid0]somebody[/iost_uid0] was going to say it. FatMat426:  Um, what was the point of bringing in that [bost_uid0]Mysterious Future Guy[/bost_uid0] again? :suspicious: NAH:  Whoops, forgot about him. Just one more scene or two... Zeke:  Hey! This is full of blank pages! Vreenak: It's a [bost_uid0]FAAAAAAKE[/bost_uid0]! Mysterious Future Guy:  Ha! Now I will reveal myself! I am actually-- Katy Jane:  Porthos? Derek:  Silik? The Squid:  Please, [iost_uid0]please[/iost_uid0] don't let it be a famous news anchor... taya17:  John Sheridan, is that you? MFG:  No no, wrong Future Guy. I'm actually a future Zeke, come back in time to nab that cookbook before my past self could get it so that I will have the recipes for myself! Zeke:  Think about what you just said. It makes no sense. So you make no sense. Which means I make no sense. And that does not make any sense whatsoever. [iost_uid0](Celeste whimpers in pain and covers her ears.)[/iost_uid0] Future Zeke:  This is a fiver. It doesn't have to make sense. Besides, I wanted to discourage myself from going on any more wild gooseberry pie chases anyway. Standback:  Calling this long drivel a fiver is what makes no sense. Zeke:  Point. I'm convinced that NAH wrote this now. Kosst:  So do you know what the dark secret of the Pies of Zetar is? Future Zeke:  Nope. Kira:  Drat. [iost_uid0](A sequel looms at Ludicrous Speed.)[/iost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#270
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]hey since when does "GAK" turn red? cool lol[/colorost_uid0]
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Dental Hygienists are X-Rayted. *´¨) ¸.·´¸.·*´¨) ¸.·*¨) (¸.·´ (¸.·`Floss Naked! |
#271
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[quoteost_uid0="Celeste"][color=#000000ost_uid0]hey since when does "GAK" turn red? cool lol[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0][deadpan] It was a very bloody GAKking. [/deadpan][/colorost_uid0]
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#272
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Hmm. John Sheridan appears once in this fiver and it has to be connected to me. I wonder why?
Great fiver, NAH. Obviously TOO bored! Whoo hoo! [/colorost_uid0] |
#273
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[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Sa'ar Chasm: I'm coming, just so I can get a line in somewhe--oh, wait. Never mind.[/quoteost_uid0]
How characteristically cynical.[/colorost_uid0]
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The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them. |
#274
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]nice one Nah [/colorost_uid0]
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Vulcan children are never late with their Sehlat's dinner |
#275
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]nice one Nah
Edit: it was so good i had to say it twice [/colorost_uid0]
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Vulcan children are never late with their Sehlat's dinner |
#276
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]I get a picture of a broom! YAAAAAY!
Erm, not that I have such a boring life that I would really get that excited over something so uninteresting. No. By the way, does anyone want to take a look at my extensive collection of pictures of paint drying?[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants |
#277
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Ooh ooh me me! I love to watch paint dry.[/colorost_uid0]
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Vulcan children are never late with their Sehlat's dinner |
#278
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]"Pies in the Fooled, Part One"
ijd gaf: Okay, the last title was fairly obvious, but how is anyone supposed to recognize this reference? NAHTMMM: By paying attention to the next scene. Observe. Disposable Redshirt: Red rum! Red rum! Red--GAK! ijd gaf: Whatever. Arzosah: Hi everyone! I'm here to tell you the next part's just after everyone returns to Earth from Zetar, OK? Oh, and Andromeda rocks! Woo-hoo! [iost_uid0]NAHTMMM: And yeah, the fight's a rip-off. So sue m--er, I mean, so sue taya17. [/iost_uid0]*bonk*[iost_uid0] Ouch![/iost_uid0] PHJ: What the frell is going on in here? Standback: That's what we'd like to know, and we've been here for the past few hours. Celeste: Now-Zeke challenged Future-Zeke to a duel over the recipe book--and Future-Zeke accepted! Sa'ar: You know, the one we went to Zetar for in the previous installment. catalina marina: Was that an example of bald-faced exposition? Sa'ar: [iost_uid0]Shameless[/iost_uid0] bald-faced exposition. Â Hey, whatever gets me lines. taya17: I can't fathom why Now-Zeke would even try this. After all, Future-Zeke's already experienced this as Now-Zeke. He should [iost_uid0]remember[/iost_uid0] how Now-Zeke will fight. NAHTMMM: Ah, but Future-Zeke has to be careful not to inflict any permanent injuries on Now-Zeke because he'll suffer from them too--OW! That hurt! taya17: Then be quiet and think, silly! Now-Zeke has to be careful for the same reason, because he'll eventually become Future-Zeke. Sa'ar: Forty. PHJ: 40 seconds until the duel starts? Sa'ar: No, 40 times those two have gone over the same exact ground, word-for-blow. It's like we're trapped in a sadistic time loop of doom. Â Speaking of which, NAH's using up our Band-Aid supplies. Nan: Heh, those kids. Arguing over nothing. Zeke are borrowing a pair of my foam bats for this duel, so they don't exactly have to worry about breaking each other's necks. O'Pipp: "A pair"? Â Nan, how many bats do you have? Nan: Erm, right now? Â About a dozen, I think. Â ...Hey, I go through them pretty fast. The Blue Screen of Death can be so inspiring. [iost_uid0]In the kitchen...[/iost_uid0] Future-Zeke: [iost_uid0](walking in)[/iost_uid0] Time to check my pie. Looks good to me. Mmm, fresh-from-the-oven Zetarian blueberry pie. Captain Galactic: [iost_uid0](from another room)[/iost_uid0] Er, sir, I found an old brownbelt. Are you sure you want to wear that 'trusty old' greenbelt? Future-Zeke: You found my brownbelt? Wow, how long has that been missing? All right, I'm coming... [iost_uid0](leaves)[/iost_uid0] Now-Zeke: La di da, oh look, pie. Mmm, fresh-from-the-oven blueberry pie. Future-Zeke: Time to eat my pie. Hey! You! Get outta my pie! Now-Zeke: Sheesh, one little slice and you go ballistic. I hope I never become [iost_uid0]that[/iost_uid0] touchy. Future-Zeke: You mean you aren't already? Now-Zeke: I mean about something other than exclamation points. What's the worst this can do, become a plot complication? FatMat: ...Let the duuuel beegin! [iost_uid0](The two Zekes begin circling in a rip-offish manner.)[/iost_uid0] Future-Zeke: You are using Benoni's Defense against me, eh? Now-Zeke: I thought it fitting considering the enclosed area. Future-Zeke: Naturally, you must suspect me to attack with Nescafe Frappe? --Hey, wait! [bost_uid0]I[/bost_uid0] wanted to be the Dread Pirate! Now-Zeke: Oh, but I-you am. It's only you-you who isn't. Future-Zeke: Whatever. Ha! Almost got you that time! And here you go into the Italian defense--short jabs center and left to set me back on my heels, then-- [iost_uid0]*POW!*[/iost_uid0] Future-Zeke: Ow, my head! That swing wasn't short! Now-Zeke: I decided to transpose to a Spanish attack on the spur of the moment. Ruy: You know, if not for my presence, nobody would get the nerdy running gag in the last three or four lines. Â And they still won't. Future-Zeke: I sure wasn't expecting a Spanish from you-- Zeke: Of course you didn't! NOBODY expects the Spanish Transposition! Everybody Else: ACK! *thud* FatMat: Oof! ...One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, [bost_uid0]ten[/bost_uid0]! And theee winnah is [bost_uid0]Noww-Zeeeke[/bost_uid0]! ...Whew, now I can stop talking like that. taya17: Inconceivable! mudshark: The painfully awful play on words or the outcome? taya17: Both! [color=grayost_uid0]Woman: You still in here? Man: Why did you have to throw me in this pitch-black room and lock me in? Woman: For your own protection. You know, from... Man: Oh, right. What did you want to ask? Woman: Can you tell me anything about Zetarian pies? Man: Ah, their pies. Their pies were irresistibly yummy. But they were used for irresistible evil, meant to destroy enemies of Zetar from the inside out. Zetar would sign a peace treaty with a world and send a few pies as gifts along with the pink copy. Within a few weeks, that world would have torn itself apart.[/colorost_uid0] NeoMatrix: Ooo, spooky. [color=grayost_uid0]Woman: Sshhh! How did [iost_uid0]you[/iost_uid0] get in here? NeoMatrix: The same way everybody else goes anywhere with anyone who wants to go anywhere alone. I hid in the baggage compartment. Woman: Whatever. Just keep quiet. --So, how did the pies cause the destruction of an entire civilization? Man: Supposedly, anyone who ate the pie would come down with a violent, uncontrollable urge t--[/colorost_uid0][color=redost_uid0][bost_uid0]GAK![/bost_uid0][/colorost_uid0] Woman: [iost_uid0]What the--[bost_uid0]O'PIPP![/bost_uid0][/iost_uid0] :swear: O'Pipp: Woo-hoo! Just five more kills and I can trade in for a magazine subscription! ...Wait, that's not how it's supposed to go... Woman: [bost_uid0]Do you realize you may have just doomed the [iost_uid0]Earth[/iost_uid0] to [iost_uid0]destruction[/iost_uid0]?[/bost_uid0] O'Pipp: What, by killing Jonas? If it didn't make any difference the first few dozen times, why would it matter now? Woman: Hold on a moment. The way this is going, no one's ever going to mention that I'm Kira. So I'll do it myself: I'm Kira. --Where were we again? NeoMatrix: Something about causing doom and destruction. Kira: Oh, nothing important then. I must have been thinking of "Topic Title". Hey, anyone want to go for some pie? Everyone Else: Mmm, pie. ([iost_uid0]Everyone heads for the pie store at Ludicrous Speed.[/iost_uid0])[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#279
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]This obsession with pies is becomming somewhat unhealthy.
It's only a pun if you want it to be.[/colorost_uid0]
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Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants |
#280
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Funny fiver, but I still got only one line. :swear:
[/colorost_uid0]
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~Bachelor of Science Marijke I'm not the devil, I just work for her. What spoon? There is no spoon. According to Zeke, it's a cat. ~NeoMatrix "Apparently we're on the wrong side. Or the right side if you like winning." ~Spike Sa'ar Chasm: Too far south you hit Belgium. catalina marina: Not in Limburg you don't. Sa'ar Chasm: You do if you go south in the right way. |
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