The Five-Minute Forums  

Go Back   The Five-Minute Forums > FiveMinute.net > Miscellaneous
Register FAQ Community Calendar Today's Posts Search

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #2561  
Old 03-05-2004, 01:35 PM
catalina_marina's Avatar
catalina_marina catalina_marina is offline
Surfin' you say?
Member
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: North-West of the South-East of Nowhere.
Posts: 4,949
Send a message via ICQ to catalina_marina Send a message via AIM to catalina_marina Send a message via MSN to catalina_marina Send a message via Yahoo to catalina_marina
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: GAK!

A: You canŽt kill him, because that would be in violation with the human rights.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
~Bachelor of Science Marijke

I'm not the devil, I just work for her.

What spoon? There is no spoon. According to Zeke, it's a cat. ~NeoMatrix

"Apparently we're on the wrong side. Or the right side if you like winning." ~Spike

Sa'ar Chasm: Too far south you hit Belgium.
catalina marina: Not in Limburg you don't.
Sa'ar Chasm: You do if you go south in the right way.
Reply With Quote
  #2562  
Old 03-05-2004, 03:24 PM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Can I kill the murderer?

A: Be careful what you pun for[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2563  
Old 03-05-2004, 11:40 PM
Opium's Avatar
Opium Opium is offline
Calvinist
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Posts: 5,449
Send a message via AIM to Opium Send a message via MSN to Opium Send a message via Yahoo to Opium
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: There was a guy who died. His funeral was on top of a big hill. Then, suddenly, a mourner hit the coffin. Well, the coffin went sliding down the big hill, and right into the local drug store! The coffin hit the pharmacists desk. The coffin lid popped up, the guy popped up, and said, "Druggist, do you have anything to stop this coffin?"
Get it? Coughing? Coffin? HA!


A: That was oddly long and pointless.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
George Orwell gives meaning to TopHatMan\'s life.
Opium, Princess Heroine of Laudanum...Part of The Morphine Party: The Party For Not... Crushing... Me? :shock:
Opium. Don\'t take drugs, just read them.
Please vote Morphine! (Thanks, Zeke!)
Needing more sleep since before 2003
Reply With Quote
  #2564  
Old 03-06-2004, 02:23 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Oh look, a long dulled stick

Q: Remember that pun you told me yesterday?

A: Get to the point or else I point this at you.[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2565  
Old 03-06-2004, 07:16 AM
Opium's Avatar
Opium Opium is offline
Calvinist
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Posts: 5,449
Send a message via AIM to Opium Send a message via MSN to Opium Send a message via Yahoo to Opium
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Oh look! You're holding a little water gun. You know, that reminds of the time that we were all bored backstage during a long rehearsal and this guy desided to fill the water gun and he started to squirt it at people and then he stopped.


A: The top hat man went up the stairs and gave a speech.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
George Orwell gives meaning to TopHatMan\'s life.
Opium, Princess Heroine of Laudanum...Part of The Morphine Party: The Party For Not... Crushing... Me? :shock:
Opium. Don\'t take drugs, just read them.
Please vote Morphine! (Thanks, Zeke!)
Needing more sleep since before 2003
Reply With Quote
  #2566  
Old 03-06-2004, 08:27 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: So what happened after they announced the winner for best mall drama?

A: The winner of that award was John[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2567  
Old 03-07-2004, 12:53 AM
Opium's Avatar
Opium Opium is offline
Calvinist
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Posts: 5,449
Send a message via AIM to Opium Send a message via MSN to Opium Send a message via Yahoo to Opium
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: I heard that John, Top Hat Man, Redshirt #8 and Wesley were up for best death-scene-that-arent-death-scenes-and-therefore-they-come-back-to-annoy-more-people awards. Who won?


A: The answer is... Top Hat Man![/colorost_uid0]

__________________
George Orwell gives meaning to TopHatMan\'s life.
Opium, Princess Heroine of Laudanum...Part of The Morphine Party: The Party For Not... Crushing... Me? :shock:
Opium. Don\'t take drugs, just read them.
Please vote Morphine! (Thanks, Zeke!)
Needing more sleep since before 2003
Reply With Quote
  #2568  
Old 03-07-2004, 04:04 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: The Question is...Who fixed your electrical last week?

A: This answer has been left blank to annoy you[/colorost_uid0]

Reply With Quote
  #2569  
Old 03-07-2004, 07:44 AM
Michiel's Avatar
Michiel Michiel is offline
Last of the ko fighters
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 523
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Q:[/bost_uid0] This question has been left blank to irritate you.

[bost_uid0]A:[/bost_uid0] Don't blame me, it said so on that piece of paper.[/colorost_uid0]

__________________
The strength of a civilization is not measured by its ability
to wage wars, but rather by its ability to prevent them.
- Gene Roddenberry
Reply With Quote
  #2570  
Old 03-07-2004, 08:18 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Why did you blame me for writing that message on the piece of paper?

A: Don't you just love the endless loops[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2571  
Old 03-07-2004, 08:31 AM
Opium's Avatar
Opium Opium is offline
Calvinist
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Posts: 5,449
Send a message via AIM to Opium Send a message via MSN to Opium Send a message via Yahoo to Opium
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Did you go on a roller coaster you get dizzy?



A: Wow! You cold market that or something.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
George Orwell gives meaning to TopHatMan\'s life.
Opium, Princess Heroine of Laudanum...Part of The Morphine Party: The Party For Not... Crushing... Me? :shock:
Opium. Don\'t take drugs, just read them.
Please vote Morphine! (Thanks, Zeke!)
Needing more sleep since before 2003
Reply With Quote
  #2572  
Old 03-07-2004, 08:48 AM
Michiel's Avatar
Michiel Michiel is offline
Last of the ko fighters
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 523
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Q:[/bost_uid0] I just came up with this great idea. It's a box with a banana-shaped thingy attached to it. It allows you to talk to others who have the same box over great distances!

[bost_uid0]A:[/bost_uid0] No! That's not an option![/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The strength of a civilization is not measured by its ability
to wage wars, but rather by its ability to prevent them.
- Gene Roddenberry
Reply With Quote
  #2573  
Old 03-07-2004, 09:49 AM
Opium's Avatar
Opium Opium is offline
Calvinist
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Posts: 5,449
Send a message via AIM to Opium Send a message via MSN to Opium Send a message via Yahoo to Opium
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: If you need some toothpaste, here's $5-walk to the story down the street.

A: But why is all the rum gone? Top Hat Man and I wanted to drink and watch "The Matrix".[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
George Orwell gives meaning to TopHatMan\'s life.
Opium, Princess Heroine of Laudanum...Part of The Morphine Party: The Party For Not... Crushing... Me? :shock:
Opium. Don\'t take drugs, just read them.
Please vote Morphine! (Thanks, Zeke!)
Needing more sleep since before 2003
Reply With Quote
  #2574  
Old 03-07-2004, 06:15 PM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: I hope you didnt mind me coming here and eating lunch.

A: Out of rum? Then just replicate some more.[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2575  
Old 03-07-2004, 07:42 PM
Michiel's Avatar
Michiel Michiel is offline
Last of the ko fighters
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 523
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Q:[/bost_uid0] So children, what's the lessen we've learned today?

[bost_uid0]A:[/bost_uid0] It will not protect you. You wear it, it does not wear you.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
The strength of a civilization is not measured by its ability
to wage wars, but rather by its ability to prevent them.
- Gene Roddenberry
Reply With Quote
  #2576  
Old 03-07-2004, 08:13 PM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Look Sam, I got me a cloak that protects me.

A: Congrats, you bagged a murderer[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2577  
Old 03-07-2004, 09:10 PM
Scooter's Avatar
Scooter Scooter is offline
Doctoral candidate
Staff
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Earth, again
Posts: 831
Send a message via AIM to Scooter
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q. Eww, what do you think is in this big heavy smelly bag?

A. Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
An updated list of all my online writing can be found here. Check it out.
Reply With Quote
  #2578  
Old 03-08-2004, 01:05 AM
Opium's Avatar
Opium Opium is offline
Calvinist
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Posts: 5,449
Send a message via AIM to Opium Send a message via MSN to Opium Send a message via Yahoo to Opium
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: What's the Witch King's motto?



A: Yes Sam, and we may even meet The Top Hat Man Elf.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
George Orwell gives meaning to TopHatMan\'s life.
Opium, Princess Heroine of Laudanum...Part of The Morphine Party: The Party For Not... Crushing... Me? :shock:
Opium. Don\'t take drugs, just read them.
Please vote Morphine! (Thanks, Zeke!)
Needing more sleep since before 2003
Reply With Quote
  #2579  
Old 03-08-2004, 03:23 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Are we going down this path to see the wizard?

A: Um, its yellow. I prefer normal looking roads.[/colorost_uid0]
Reply With Quote
  #2580  
Old 03-08-2004, 08:41 AM
Opium's Avatar
Opium Opium is offline
Calvinist
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Posts: 5,449
Send a message via AIM to Opium Send a message via MSN to Opium Send a message via Yahoo to Opium
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Q: Follow follow follow follow follow the yellow brick road!



A: I guess that was obvious.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
George Orwell gives meaning to TopHatMan\'s life.
Opium, Princess Heroine of Laudanum...Part of The Morphine Party: The Party For Not... Crushing... Me? :shock:
Opium. Don\'t take drugs, just read them.
Please vote Morphine! (Thanks, Zeke!)
Needing more sleep since before 2003
Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 01:21 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.