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The Stuff You Always Wanted to Say Game
Through a series of events too long to recount here, I stumbled onto a site (http://www.rinkworks.com/stupid/cs_revenge.shtml) that tells stories about how ignorant some people are about computers. One story is the following:
Customer: "Can I ask you a really stupid question?" Tech Support: "Yes. And history will bear me out on that." Needless to say, that user was also a friend. I have always wanted to say this to someone, and there he was! So, the game is, what phrases have you waited to say? Stuff you've read someplace and wanted to show off. Obscure puns you've wanted to repeat. Absolutely horrible groaners that you've wanted to inflict on an audience. We can also extend this to lines that we like to use, even though they are only amusing to ourselves. Now I'll start of with my own examples: I like to use the phrase "ciao for now" expressly because it is corny. My brother once inadvertanly created one of the funniest and most horrible puns ever invented in my presence. He said that his role model was the Pillsbury Dough Boy. Get it? My sister and I still laugh over that one. One time I actually said Shazam as an expletive, and even I immediately winced. As for what I've always wanted to say, the answer is simple. I've been waiting for years for someone to ask what the meaning of life is, just so I can say 42. Horribly retreaded, overused, beaten to death, resurrected, then beated to death again joke, but I still love the idea of it. It cheers me up at times when little else will.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further. |
#2
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Somebody stopped me on the street in Manhattan once and asked me how to get to Chelsea Piers.
I looked him dead in the eye and said "Practice, practice, practice." (then I gave him directions. But it was too perfect of a setup not to do it.)
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Any truth is better than indefinite doubt. — Sherlock Holmes "The Adventure of the Yellow Face," Arthur Conan Doyle |
#3
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That looks like the kind of unintellible joke that one would be better not to understand. Ignorance is bliss.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further. |
#4
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The word you're looking for is "unintelligible", I think, and the joke to which evay was alluding has been around just about as long as has Carnegie Hall, if not longer. If you want to pretend that it's too cryptic, well, then... that's up to you.
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Methinks Ted Sturgeon was too kind. 'Yes, but I think some people should be offended.' -- John Cleese (on whether he thought some might be offended by Monty Python) |
#5
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It's all Greek to me. You guys are my gyros.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further. |
#6
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εὐχαριστῶ σοί
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"Please, Aslan," said Lucy, "what do you call soon?" "I call all times soon," said Aslan; and instantly he vanished away and Lucy was alone with the Magician. |
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