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Old 12-27-2005, 02:09 AM
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Default December 26


And now, at last, the honest-to-Kryptonian-god conclusion of the Smallville event. Drumroll, please... here's Five-Minute Superman: The Movie, by Scooter! You'll believe a man can five.


Be sure to check out the front page -- I've finally made a new Christmas banner. And be here tomorrow for a big change of pace.
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Old 12-27-2005, 03:01 AM
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Quote:
Lex: Otis, chap with the cape there. Five rounds rapid.
I always somehow forget just how lethal Scooter's one-liners can be. Probably one of those subconcious self-preseveration thingys.

Hurrah! And also, GAK!
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Old 12-27-2005, 04:10 AM
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Zeke- like the way the seasonal site update looks. Is there any chance that this thing I should be here for will involve something I've actually seen? As a member of the next generation of Fiver readers, I wholeheartedly approve boldly reading what I've never seen before, but it gets a little annoying sometimes.
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Old 12-27-2005, 06:47 AM
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This one's a Voyager update.

Hmm... there seems to be a lot of interest in getting back to Trek stuff. Several of you guys mentioned your hopes for new ENT fivers recently. I'll bear that in mind.
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 12-27-2005, 07:11 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by e of pi
... involve something I've actually seen?
I too would love to see more Trek stuff but -- you mean you haven't seen Superman: The Movie? I thought everyone had! It was the Matrix of 1978!
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Old 12-27-2005, 07:58 AM
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I do know a few people who never saw Matrix...

(Heathens, all of them.)

Gatac
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Old 12-27-2005, 05:50 PM
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Or only four when it came out... you forget I'm 15.
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e of pi: I know you have too much free time.
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e of pi: Well, so does anyone who posts on 5M.net. It comes from the extra 55 minutes.

We are the BSG. Your resources and injokes wil be added to our own, depleting your fanbase. Resistance is futile. So say we all.
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Old 12-27-2005, 07:51 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gatac
I do know a few people who never saw Matrix...

(Heathens, all of them.)

Gatac
How dare ye call me a heathen!
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Old 12-28-2005, 03:29 AM
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My name's Heather, not heathen. hehe. Silly gatac.
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Old 12-28-2005, 03:31 AM
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Quote:
Jimmy: Thanks, Superman! I heard you repaired the whole San Andreas single-handedly!
Superman: Yes, Jimmy, I was generous to a fault.
That is awful.

Quote:
Clark: All those powers, and I couldn't save him. Now I have no father.
Voice of Jor-El: Son, remember how much fun we had cruising through the Mutara Nebula --
Clark: No father at all.
Jor-El was hilarious. Good job on his characterization in general. Both as tour guide and as general pain-in-the-butt.
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Old 12-28-2005, 10:50 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Derek
Jor-El was hilarious. Good job on his characterization in general. Both as tour guide and as general pain-in-the-butt.
Thanks. I find it very ominous that the trailer for Superman Returns features only the voice of Marlon Brando's Jor-El.
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Old 12-28-2005, 10:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Quote:
Originally Posted by Derek
Jor-El was hilarious. Good job on his characterization in general. Both as tour guide and as general pain-in-the-butt.
Thanks. I find it very ominous that the trailer for Superman Returns features only the voice of Marlon Brando's Jor-El.
Sorry, that was me.
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Old 12-28-2005, 12:57 PM
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Sad to say my own wife has not seen the Matrix
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Old 12-28-2005, 02:12 PM
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^ Neither has my wife.

And I meant to mention this earlier, Zeke:
Quote:
You'll believe a man can five.
Quote:
20,000 Justice Leagues under the sea
Quote:
Jingle bells, Batman sm-- no, wait
Quote:
Clark dies! Really! And Seven returns to the Borg!
Are simply terrible. Terrible! And also highly amusing.
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Old 12-29-2005, 01:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Derek
Are simply terrible. Terrible! And also highly amusing.
I also wanted to call attention to the terrible and very funny Smallville blurbs.
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Old 12-30-2005, 03:06 PM
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Default Re: December 26
Quote:
Indian Chief: ...And then Custer said, "Not with an orangutan I won't!
Nice work, Scooter. Too many good lines to quote them all, but this was too good to pass up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke


Be sure to check out the front page -- I've finally made a new Christmas banner.
Nice!
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Old 12-31-2005, 04:11 PM
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Fun stuff, Scooter!
I remember thinking how the storyline was kept waiting for oh-so-long when I saw the movie as well.
Valium: I'm probably worse than a heathen with regard to Matrix, which may or may not make you feel better.
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Old 01-09-2006, 10:24 AM
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In light of Zeke's disclaimer on the Superman fiver, this is absorbing and appalling reading: the 20-year nightmare of Superman V/Superman Returns.
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Old 01-09-2006, 11:25 AM
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Oh WOW. That's link day material, no question. I knew about some of this (I've read Moriarty's description of the JJ Abrams script, and also a pretty lousy Kevin Smith script for Superman Lives), but I had no idea of the sheer mass of bad ideas that have gone into this thing. What particularly worries me is that this post is only two months old. I thought Superman Returns was a clean break from these rejected plans -- if it has anything to do with them, I'll be a lot less optimistic.
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 01-09-2006, 10:34 PM
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I don't think you could make stuff like that up. To echo Zeke, wow.
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