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  #1  
Old 04-01-2018, 07:57 PM
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Zeke Zeke is offline
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Default Five-Minute Anbar!

Big news! Today is the launch of our biggest subsite yet! Like, literally biggest. Huge! Bigger than the void between galaxies!

A while ago, Excelsior told the story of the starship Anbar, which was lost for 59 years outside the Galactic Barrier. As a joke, they framed the relevant episode ("Sunset") as Season 59, Episode 12 of an actual Anbar series. This has confused and intrigued fans who didn't get the joke ever since (much like April Fool's jokes often have for 5MV's readers in the past, though I'm not sure why that comparison came to mind).

But now the Anbar series is real! Not a hoax! Not an imaginary story! I have painstakingly reconstructed all 708 episodes, then reduced them to fivers in my usual style! Behold Five-Minute Anbar!

Subsite code: 5M0, because they're in the Big Empty and fighting aliens called the Zero, and anyway I've always wanted an excuse to use that one. Subsite colour: dark! Very very dark! Almost too dark to see! Because there's nothing outside the galaxy! Nothing to do! Nothing to explore! Except alien parasites that want to kill you! Taste the excitement!

(For any further questions, please refer to the FAQ.)
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[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
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Old 04-01-2018, 08:21 PM
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evay evay is offline
But if you put the hammer in an elevator...
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you are a delight, Zeke. Never change. And happy April Fool's!
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Old 04-01-2018, 08:52 PM
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Nate the Great Nate the Great is offline
You just activated his Trek card
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How exciting, one more "just passing through to confirm that I saw a post but have nothing to contribute" stamp on my card and I can trade it in for a Quark's Mug!
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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Old 04-01-2018, 09:14 PM
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Zeke Zeke is offline
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(Nobody tell him they don't take that card anymore. I wanna see the look on his face when he tries to redeem it.)
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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  #5  
Old 04-01-2018, 09:36 PM
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NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
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My goodness.
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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Old 04-01-2018, 10:05 PM
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Nate the Great Nate the Great is offline
You just activated his Trek card
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I miss stamp cards. My local thrift store has them once in awhile, but my family has never spent enough in the applicable period to earn anything.

The real fun was when there were still bakery outlets around that had them. I miss bakery outlets.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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