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#1
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Block 2-2: Politics as usual
The stage is set; time to finally meet a couple of our main characters. First we have President Whitmore (Bill Pullman), who's loosely Clinton-based but reminds me more of B5's John Sheridan. He wakes up next to his young daughter, takes a call from his wife, and then briefly talks politics with his communications director, Constance; finally the SecDef calls with the big news. Constance, as we'll find out later, is the ex-wife of...
David Levinson (Jeff Goldblum), who's playing chess with his dad in Central Park. His dad -- named Julius in the film, Moishe in the script -- is a Jewish cliche, so naturally he's nagging his son. David then goes to his job at a cable company, where his boss Marty, who's been trying to reach him for a while, is in a panic -- all the satellites in Earth orbit have suddenly stopped responding. One or two scenes for each paragraph, ideally not two for both. (Personally, I'd leave out Constance's first appearance; we can establish her later.) Script's still here. Side note: The First Lady is played by Mary McDonnell, who was already famous at this point for Dances With Wolves, but is best known these days as BSG's Laura Roslin. Naturally this is prime reference fodder, especially since there's a scene where she's dying.
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#2
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Patricia: I wuv my daddy!
Constance: The evil, heartless media is picking on you! President Whitmore: Now that I've been sufficiently demonstrated to be a Good Guy, let's give the audience what they came for: two men playing chess. David: Geez, what's going to kill this planet first: your disregard for ecological concerns, or the alien ship screwing with television reception? Julius: Probably both. And because someone had to say it . . . Satellite: In Soviet Russia, satellite smashes YOU! Mothership: Are we *in* Soviet Russia? Satellite: Er, no. Mothership: Well, then . . .
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#3
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My second scene might be a bit weak, but I think the first one's pretty good. What do you all think? Funny? Not?
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#4
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"Habitably" makes me wince.
Here's my stab at a first block; I'll have to go and think about the second (I quite like yours, NAH, but it's maybe a bit too short). Quote:
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Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants |
#5
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Heh. About the only way any scene I write could be "too short" would be by tempting me to allow myself an overlong scene later on in the belief that "It all averages out".
That said, there's room for a line by the President's wife. I don't know what she'd say, though. The obvious line is to the effect of "You're cheating on me?" but that would sidetrack my snarky, deconstructionist version. Maybe a throwaway line "Wait, what's this about a blonde?" I do feel like another meta-line, about "I am trying to keep my family in line and failing adorably" or something, would be too much. I'm not familiar with Dances With Wolves or BSG, so maybe someone can come up with something based on one or the other. Anyway, your scene is funny, too.
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#6
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Anyone else have any thoughts?
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#7
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Patricia: I wuv my daddy!
Constance: The evil, heartless media is picking on you! President Whitmore: Now that I've been sufficiently demonstrated to be a Good Guy, let's give the audience what they came for: two men playing chess. David: Geez, what's going to kill this planet first: your disregard for ecological concerns, or the alien ship screwing with television reception? Julius: Why don't you focus on smaller matters first, like cleaning up your love life? David: Because it's so much more fun to yell at others about cleaning up the world. Speaking of which, gotta get to my workplace. People have been putting bottles in the trash can all week, and I'm looking forward to throwing a tantrum about it.
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#8
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After giving it a great deal of careful, selfless, objective consideration, I think we should add a line about how awesome certain seven-letter acronyms are. The President could say it, or maybe there could be a random Greek chorus hired for the purpose.
*nods solemnly*
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#9
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Given the announced titles for the sequels, we'll probably want to work "forever" in at some point.
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My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
#10
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Something tells me this comver will never be finished.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate. Zeke: It comes nateurally to him. mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea. Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity. Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own! Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity. Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further. |
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