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Originally Posted by Nate the Great
Reminds me of the old gag "There are only two seasons in Minnesota: winter and road construction."
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Funny. I always heard that joke as "winter and deep winter." That was is funnier, and has the advantage of being true.
Anyhow, I loved the fiver. I've always been one for longer fivers--although Derek really shaped up my one DS9 fiver ("Battle Lines") into a much better work. I've never bought into the whole "altver" thing, but everyone else does, so I follow the rule, but I consider that as "canon" as anything else, given that there's no actual publishing going on. Some favorite lines:
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Last time on Star Trek DS9:
Big Dominion Fleet: Hi
Odo's Shapeshifting Powers: Bye
Chancellor Gowron: Die!
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It rhymes!
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Worf: Where are they? I ordered my Gagh and Bloodwine hours ago!
O'Brien: Mabye the Klingons intercepted them? You know how deadly the Pizza Delivery route from Earth to Bajor is.
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Like the Porthos-as-chili joke, this one cracked me up for absolutely no good reason.
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Sisko: We need to infiltrate the most heavily defended sector in Klingon space, evade the Yan-Isleth, and somehow test Gowron to see if he is a shapeshifter. Any ideas?
Worf: Death to the opposition!
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Appropriate quoting is the real way to my heart. (And cross-fiver references are the greatest things in the history of ever... but I am coming to that.)
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Bashir: What are they?
Jadzi: Crumpled up pieces of paper.
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Kira: How will you get there?
Sisko: I'll have to call in all my favors. It will use up every single resource I have on Cardassia.
O'Brien: What?
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Just watched this episode. The "What?" from O'Brien makes the joke, though.
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Dukat: My spoon is detecting a temporal anomaly...
Kira: Aha, that's what that does!
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Paneldemonium, Part 6.
I fell over.
(My sister and I make jokes about spoons and tricoders to this day.)
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O'Brien: I hope I remember how to crumple these just right.
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"Martok": Your name is not known to me, but your quotations are...
"Pahash": Yours resemble that of a Changelings...
"Martok": No they don't... Uh, bye...
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Does my laughing at this merely make me a simpleton who loves meta-refs? Probably.
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Gowron: Now we begin the trial of 'Fearing my Creepy Eyes!' Bow down, and FEAR THEM! Oh, and medals. Whatever.
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...and all the other creepy eyes jokes. They never stopped making me laugh.
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"Martok": Gowron lit it on fire with his eyes. Anyways, politicians suck. By that logic, Gowron sucks. By that logic, you rock, and our losses suck. You must kill Gowron, and do it as quickly as possible. As painfully as possible. The SOLID must SUFFER.
Sisko: Ok, lets go then...
Odo: ...
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Again with the contemptuous silence.
No idea what happened in the last scene.
Also, it great to see someone from forever ago come out of the shadows. I enjoyed it, and I hope you'll submit it to Derek sometime--I'm sure you'll be forgiven for violating this (silly) taboo given that it's your first time.