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Old 04-08-2003, 11:21 PM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]O'Pipp: Aaah! *slam* :O
Zeke: Helmsman, Red Alert just activated. What is going on?
O'Pipp: The ship ahead just slammed to a stop out of nowhere! We're gonna collide and explode into a million bajillion pieces, ma'am! :crying:
Zeke: It isn't crunch time yet, Ensign. I'll let you know when.
PHJ: Braking thrusters inoperative, sir! I told ye she couldnae take much more of this!
NAH: I calculate the odds that we will collide and die horribly as being approximately 7,621.4 to 7,613. In other words, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIIIE! AAAHH! OH NOO--*thunk* urk
Katy Jane: [reprovingly] Captain!
Zeke: He was getting on my nerves. Every time someone uses an exclamation point, I cringe. There's always a chance that they'll slip up and add a second one. Time till impact?
O'Pipp: Estimate ten seconds.
Zeke: Sco--er, PHJ! I need thrusters in five! Helm, sound collision alarm. All hands, brace for impact!
O'Pipp: With pleasure. [bangs on her console]
PHJ: Right. Lemme in there--
O'Pipp: OW! Quit pulling my leg.
PHJ: Thrusters restored, Helm. Hint hint.
O'Pipp: Applying thrusters with glee, sir!
Troi: Perhaps the recent storm left an ionic residue on subspace in such a way as to affect the effect of thrusters? --Hey, what am I doing here anyway?
NAH: To deliver that useless line. Now don't ask me anything for a while. I'm busy being unconscious here. :zzz:
Ship: *suddenly comes to an abrupt stop, literally inches from the ship in front*
NAH: *WHUMP* AGH! :dead:
NeoMatrix: What the...? Wasn't he b--I mean, didn't he have his collision restraint thingies engaged? :S :suspicious:
Celeste: [innocently] Oh, I don't know, these things are still in the experimental stage after all, they do seem to mysteriously disengage sometimes...[looks around at everyone looking at her] ...[iost_uid0]What[/iost_uid0]? Don't look at me like that. ...[iost_uid0]Dangit, people, I'm a [bost_uid0]dentist[/bost_uid0], not a public safety advocate![/iost_uid0]
O'Pipp: Yay, saved again by the incredibly skilled helmswoman! With pointy pointy ears, even.
PHJ: *ahem*
Zeke: Quite right, PHJ. We all contributed to saving the ship from disaster. Except for Butterfly Boy over there. :eyeroll: Isn't that right, Sp--er, First Officer?
Kira: :eyeroll: How you people can make a game out of almost crashing into a brand-new pickup driven by a big mean-looking guy is totally beyond me. I absolutely refuse to believe I was [iost_uid0]ever[/iost_uid0] that young and immature.
Zeke: C'mon, Kira, lighten up. Sheesh, right now I might as well go ahead and call you Spock. Or use you to knock some sense into Butterf--
Kira: Never, EVER, compare my demeanor to that of a wooden first officer again. Clear? Good.
Celeste: Speaking of Butterfly Boy, I get first dibs on his dental work! Muahahahaaaa! --I mean, yippee!
Zeke: Fine, knock yourself out. ...O'Pipp, have you ever driven anything with anti-lock brakes before?
O'Pipp: No, that's why I jumped at the chance to drive this. Variety's the spice of life, you know.
Zeke: Well, I think your spice just gave me several ulcers.
Captain Galactic: Speaking of which, well, not really, but anyway, the pick-up is gone now. Let's get going.
O'Pipp: Oh, yes, of course.

[iost_uid0](The minivan zooms off at Ludicrous Speed. Much to Zeke's further dismay.)[/iost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
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“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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