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Old 08-27-2010, 09:49 PM
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Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
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Heh. About the only way any scene I write could be "too short" would be by tempting me to allow myself an overlong scene later on in the belief that "It all averages out".

That said, there's room for a line by the President's wife. I don't know what she'd say, though. The obvious line is to the effect of "You're cheating on me?" but that would sidetrack my snarky, deconstructionist version. Maybe a throwaway line "Wait, what's this about a blonde?"

I do feel like another meta-line, about "I am trying to keep my family in line and failing adorably" or something, would be too much. I'm not familiar with Dances With Wolves or BSG, so maybe someone can come up with something based on one or the other.

Anyway, your scene is funny, too.
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“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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