PICARD JR: Computer, display interior security grid.
COMPUTER: I'm sorry, but I can't do that. Would you like to play a game?
PICARD JR: No, I would not. Computer, display an internal schematic diagram.
COMPUTER: I'm sorry, but I can't do that. Would you like to see some interesting plants or animals?
GUINAN JR: It's a child's computer, remember? Computer, can you show me a picture of the inside of the Enterprise?
COMPUTER: Yes, I can. The Enterprise is a Galaxy-class starship. Do you know how to spell Enterprise? E N T E
PICARD JR: Delete audio.
In it's own way I'd imagine that this would be even more annoying than Q. Great scene.
ALEXANDER: I was just playing. I'm sorry, Captain.
PICARD JR: Alexander, would you mind if I borrowed your toy for a little while?
ALEXANDER: Go ahead.
When Alexander is more accepting of Picard's current state than the bridge crew, things are very wrong.
KEIKO JR: Have you figured out how to get to the Bridge?
PICARD JR:: I'm afraid I can only think of one way.
This is the main place where the obviously-too-old actor really hurts the premise. It would still be bad if the actor really did look twelve, anyway.
LURIN: We Ferengi do not bring our offspring along with us aboard ship.
Well, duh. Ferengi kids don't leave Ferenginar until they're adults. I can't help but feel that Nog is an exception.
RIKER: Okay, Morta. The Enterprise computer system is controlled by three primary main processing cores, cross-linked with a redundant melacortz ramistat. fourteen kiloquad interface modules. The core element is based on an FTL nanoprocessor with twenty five bilateral kelilactirals, with twenty of those being slaved into the primary heisenfram terminal. Now you do know what a bilateral kelilactiral is?
MORTA: Well, of course I do, human. I am not stupid.
RIKER: No, of course not. This is the isopalavial interface which controls the main firomactal drive unit. Don't touch that. You'll blow up the entire firomactal drive.
MORTA: What? Wait. What is a firomactal drive? Just explain it to me.
RIKER: That is the firomactal drive unit. It controls the ramistat core and also keeps the ontarian manifold at forty thousand KRGs.
(and with his other hand he puts sneaky commands into the computer)
RIKER: The firomactal drive is powered by--
How did Frakes memorize all this?
RO JR: It's my mother. The funny thing is, I never really drew a picture of her when I was young. It's just, for some reason I wanted to now.
GUINAN: That's the wonderful thing about crayons. They can take you to more places than a starship.
I'm amazed that Crayolas never released a Star Trek line of crayons with this quote on the front.
The Fiver
Picard Jr.: Hullo.
O'Brien: Ooops.
I can't help but feel that this is another case of missing-first-lines syndrome that's so prevalent on the site.
Picard Jr.: I know I look like a Chibi, but give me a chance. I am Picard. See, I even tug at my uniform too.
Data: Good enough for me.
He he.
Of course Chibi Picard exists.
Here's fanart of just him, and here's
one of the whole TNG crew.
Picard Jr.: I want to be taken seriously, Counselor.
Troi: I understand, so do I.
Sick burn.
Ro Jr.: Ho hum, I hate being small.
Guinan Jr.: I haven't been a child in centuries. Let's jump on the bed.
Ro Jr.: Mkay! YAY! I don't wanna grow up, I'm a Toys-R-Us kid....
I miss those commercials, and I didn't even go to Toys-R-Us very often.
DaiMon Lurin: HA! We have your ship! Now we will beam the adults aboard down to Legoland and make you build our Lego Fortress!
At the time of the episode the only Legoland was in Denmark, where LEGO was invented. At the time of the fiver in 2004, only three-Denmark, California, and Germany. Now there are 11 with 5 more in planning.
Picard Jr.: Computer, show me the security schematics of the Enterprise.
School Computer: Now why would you want to see that? How about a nice picture of the ship instead? Can you spell "ship"?
Ro Jr.: I think the computer's just turned into a shipper, sir.
Picard Jr.: Oh, great. As if I don't already have enough of those to deal with.
Ouch, that pun just hurts.
Picard Jr.: I've got computer control! All right, troops, let's retake our ship!
Enterprise Kids: Chaaaaaaarge!
Picard Jr.: Mr Worf is never going to live this down....
Odo won't let him!
Memory Alpha
* Having Ro remain a child was considered. In retrospect this doesn't seem like a bad idea since Forbes wanted to move on.
* Only appearance of main Molly actress Hana Hatae on TNG. The O'Briens moved to DS9 after this episode.
* The Ferengi actors had also appeared as different Ferengi in previous episodes. What a shock.
Nitpicker's Guide
* The young and old Picard actors have differently colored eyes. Putting aside the plausibility of colored contact lenses, I daresay this wasn't considered a big deal in the era of VHS. Don't forget that the TNG videotapes were quite expensive and usually only available by mail order back then!
* Picard's artificial heart is a BIG problem. Unless you're going to tell me that deaging the heart also healed the wound from the Naussican attack. Even then, having a big chunk of metal and plastic stuck in your chest would be a big problem. Frankly his heart should've been replaced by now.
* The Ferengi use Romulan weapons. I don't think this is a nit. Having Klingons using Romulan weapons would be a continuity error!
* Molly is only a year old, and yet she can talk like someone much older than that. Then again, early DS9 will seem to indicate that she's three. This is a darned if you do, darned if you don't, situation.