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Old 03-13-2003, 04:59 AM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Here we go again with another of these epics...maybe... :O...

Episode I: The Ghosty Menace:

(Scene: A darkened window, at night. A chilly breeze gusts by, rattling the dead brown leaves on nearby trees as it goes. Suitable theme music plays softly in the background. Ooooh, spooky. )
Ghost: Wooooooooooooooo
Derek: Zz...Mmmph...wha? What was that? Did you hear anything?
MmeBlueberry: Zzzzz...
"Owl": Woo. Woo.
Derek: [iost_uid0]"Woo"[/iost_uid0]?
"Owl": Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
Derek: Oh, it's just an owl that doesn't know how to pronounce "who". And a really cheesy theme tune. ...Zzzz...
Me: I resent that. The [iost_uid0]Ghostbusters[/iost_uid0] tune fits this Bored at School fiver perfectly.
Ghost: Whew.
Draknek: Now *that* was lame. Is that all the ghost can say, is stuff that rhymes with "moo"?

O'Pipp: Don't mind me, I'm just [color=A8A8A8ost_uid0]playing[/colorost_uid0] with all the new [color=FF8040ost_uid0]colors[/colorost_uid0] we've got here. Like [color=00FF00ost_uid0]this[/colorost_uid0]. Of course, [color=redost_uid0]red's[/colorost_uid0] a good color for a pointy-eared Jonas killer like me....Now where did that eeevil Jonas get to...?

[iost_uid0]Next morning...[/iost_uid0]
NAHTMMM: Urgh...
Sax: That's what you get for pepperin' your vodka, lad.
NAH: Meester Sax, do you believe in ghosts?
Sax: Well, Mr. Nahtmmm, a man sees quite a few strange things in space, but I daresay no, I don't believe in that particular item.
NAH: Let me be more particular, sir...Sometime last night, when it was wery wery quiet, did a ghost knock on your door and ask you to boldly go where no man has gone before?
Sax: You do realize nobody else is going to pick up on this reference.
NAH: I know, I couldn't help it. I mean, it actually fit. A bit.

Naraht: I had the weirdest dream last night. I dreamed I was being followed around my home by the Manhattan phone book. Only it was much thicker. As if that were even possible.
Katy Jane: i get the oddest feeling about this...

Siren: WOOP! WOOP! WOOOP!
FatMat: What the frell's that for?!
NAH: It just means we're entering Corny Movie Mode, in which we make fun of Every Relevant Movie Ever Made. Why? Because I felt like it. Everyone reading this, please back up your brain's hard drive at this time. Things are going to get really painfully cheesy after now. Done? Then you may continue.

Katy Jane: Aha! I think I know what everyone saw--
Audience: So do we, c'mon and get this over with!
Katy Jane: No! Obviously, I'm the naive brains of the good-guy side in this mystery-ish movie, so guess what I get to do?
mudshark: Use special knowledge that you in particular have, in order to have a brilliant insight? But you're reluctant to share it with everyone else because if you're wrong, everyone will make fun of you and you won't be the smart one of the bunch and if you're right, the movie ends before it's halfway done? So you conduct a foolish experiment in hopes of proving or disproving your theory?
Katy Jane: exactly.
mudshark: ...Only you get more than you bargained for and you mysteriously disappear, but leave a cryptic note behind to confound us when we search your room for no good reason, thus keeping the audience on the edge of their seats, waiting for us to get a grip and figure it out already?
Katy Jane: whoops, forgot about that part [imgost_uid0]http://3sygma.com/fiveminute/forums/html/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif[/imgost_uid0]

Katy Jane: La lala la, setting a trap...
Ghost: Dum-de-dum, ooo...Bait.
Katy Jane: I gotcha!
Ghost: ??
Katy Jane: No doubt that's a very significant plot device that will be used later on. Hint hint.
Audience: Fine, fine. You don't have to rub it into our faces.
Katy Jane: Yes I do, didn't you notice the Alert? But for now, *ahem* Capture of ghosty thingy. gloating
Ghost: Correction that I have you. Better gloating. Evil emoticon. Kidnapping, leading to a mysterious disappearance that will likely confound the others for most of the rest of the movie.
Katy Jane: Oops! Request that we wait so I can write the cryptic note that I forgot to write.
Ghost: Acquiesence despite lack of a good reason for doing so.

PointyHairedJedi: Lalalala, walking into Katy Jane's room with the absurd idea that she would have left a note or something explaining her disappearance...
NeoMatrix: Lessee, I'm supposed to act like I'm actually looking at three random parts of the room, then head straight to where the script says to find the cryptic note: on the floor, under the open window.
PointyHairedJedi: Hah, beat you to it. That'll teach you to dawdle like you're actually paying attention to the rest of the room. Hmmm... (reads to himself) [iost_uid0]oblique reference to notion as to what the ghosty-thingy is. Suggestion to beware...warning to be afraid. realness of ghosts...insertion of several more cryptic remarks...[/iost_uid0] Oh, I don't need to read any further. Jeez, Katy, it's supposed to be [iost_uid0]cryptic[/iost_uid0]. This is blatantly obvious. Exposure of the ghost's identity.
NeoMatrix: It is? I mean, it is. Really. Uh-huh.
Ghost: Disgust at having to kidnap both of you too. Decision not to allow any more cryptic notes.
NeoMatrix and PointyHairedJedi: Aw, shoot.

Ghost: Foreboding evil statement of intent to eat everyone alive. Evil laughter.

[iost_uid0]To be continued...?[/iost_uid0]
Celeste: It better be, because I didn't get a single line in there! More! or else... :twirls pointy metal implements of torture with a gleam in her eye:
Me: Considering that the next order of business is probably to run the running joke concerning the thing's unstoppableness into the ground, and that we'll likely do so by throwing everything including the kitchen sink and several Death Stars at it, I suspect you're going to get a lot of lines.
Celeste: Yippee! [color=whiteost_uid0]'[/colorost_uid0] Can my dog be in it? Her name's Riley and she's adorable and...
Me: Um, I dunno...we'll have to see...
Sa'ar Chasm: And me? Can I be in one?
Nan: Haven't you just answered your own question?



You are now leaving Corny Movie Mode. Congratulations on surviving it!
Redshirt: :dead:
Never mind... [imgost_uid0]http://3sygma.com/fiveminute/forums/html/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif[/imgost_uid0]



Looks like this is just gonna set things up...not the funniest thing I've ever written.... [imgost_uid0]http://3sygma.com/fiveminute/forums/html/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif[/imgost_uid0] Oh well.[/colorost_uid0]
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“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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