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Old 03-28-2023, 03:00 AM
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February 1st, 1993, "Aquiel"

Fiver by Marc

The Episode

Captain's log, stardate 46461.3. We have arrived at a communication relay station near the Klingon border, where we are scheduled to deliver supplies. However, the station has not responded to repeated hails.

Let me say this up front: Confining two people to a small station for months on end is blatantly ridiculous. Anyone would snap under those circumstances. The worst part is that there have to be any number of science projects that could be done anywhere. Have it staffed with a dozen researchers who do the boring relay stuff half a shift a week each. Duh.

LAFORGE: They must've left an audio monitoring system on. We're hearing a few thousand subspace messages.

With only two people on board you'd think the computer could be programmed to shut down all active programs and send a distress signal if there isn't any input in X hours.

RIKER: Here's your loose panel.
(the sound is of a wagging tail hitting the metal. woof!)
LAFORGE: Hey, pooch. hey, pooch, come on out of there.

Does this place seem big enough for a dog to be comfortable? I don't think so. I'd feel bad keeping a cat in here!

(Worf is cutting the deck plate out with his phaser)

There aren't any plasma torches available that could do this job better?

AQUIEL [OC]: Sent in my third request for a message delay buffer. Until it arrives, Lieutenant Rocha and I have rigged a memory module to compensate.

You shouldn't need to ask three times for equipment. And frankly under these circumstances there should be at least two spares of everything that could fail. And of course the idea of turning a memory module into a message delay buffer is ludicrous.

AQUIEL [OC]: Hello, Shiana. Sorry I haven't talked to you in a while but I've been dealing with the new Lieutenant, Rocha. So far he's been rude, arrogant and condescending, and he's only been here two days. This might be a long year.

A YEAR! Two people alone on a station for a YEAR! Are we sure that this posting isn't some sort of punishment?

CRUSHER: Well this is just a guess, but from the molecular deposition on the plating I'd say it was a high-level phaser blast.
RIKER: Could it have been a Klingon disruptor?
CRUSHER: Possibly.

I'm pretty sure that phasers and disruptors operate on sufficently different principles that you can't really mix up one with the other.

PICARD: Get Rocha's personnel file from Starfleet Command.

You didn't do that already once you realized that the station wasn't responding? For that matter, isn't the Enterprise computer big enough to hold all personnel files for a considerable chunk of Starfleet personnel?

For that matter, you should be able to get the files from a closer Starbase than Earth.

AQUIEL [on monitor]: It's because of what's been happening with that Klingon. He's getting more aggressive all the time. Not just the usual threat. Morag actually locked his disruptors to the station this time.

That seems like a pretty blatant violation of the treaty to me. She didn't tell Starfleet Command about this?

LAFORGE: There are three references to a Commander Morag, a Klingon officer who patrols this section of the border. Apparently he would pass the station every few days and harass them.

Why was this allowed to continue?

WORF: Have the courage to admit your mistakes. Or are you a lo'Be Vos?

lo'Be Vos means "thing without courage."

AQUIEL: You have to be raised on it. It's very nutritious. The taste grows on you.
LAFORGE: Batar al nalia.

That means "but not on me."

The Fiver

Riker: Lieutenant, did you lie about your age to get into Starfleet?

Where did this come from?

Dog: Woof! Woof!
Aquiel: Maura! I'm so happy to see you again, girl!
La Forge: Looks like she means a lot to you.
Aquiel: Yes, we've been inseparable ever since I found her wandering around an isolated Arctic research station whose personnel had all mysteriously died.

What is this a reference to?
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