Top Ten List of... - Step 1:See Topic. Step 2:create list
 

[color=#000000]Hey, just thought I'de start another topic of wierdness!
Just pick any topic, and write a list of top tens...

Top Ten List of 80's Media

10.Next Generation
9. Magnum PI
8. Boy George
7. Murder She Wrote
6. Duck Tales
5. Indiana Jones
4. MASH
3. Smurfs
2. 99 Redballons
1. Columbo

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Things Sa'ar Doesn't Like About Ottawa:

10: Cold.
9: Lack of mountains
8: Cold.
7: Lack of familiar grocery stores.
6: Cold.
5: The transit system.
4: Cold.
3: UofO Rez.
2: Cold.
1: -30 degree freeze-my-eyes-shut-the-thermometer-doesn't-go-this-low *COLD*![/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]How about this. The person picks the topic, then the next person creates a list, then picks the topic for the next person.

I'll start

Topic: Top 10 Villians[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]10: Cold.
9: Lack of mountains
8: Cold.
7: Lack of familiar grocery stores.
6: Cold.
5: The transit system.
4: Cold.
3: UofO Rez.
2: Cold.
1: -30 degree freeze-my-eyes-shut-the-thermometer-doesn't-go-this-low *COLD*![/quote:post_uid0]
What? I heard you mention something about it [i:post_uid0]only[/i:post_uid0] being -13. :D

Sorry Neo, Not feeling like making up top ten lists at 5:43 am.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I'll have a crack at it.

10. The Borg Queen
9. Jabba the Hutt
8. The Hood
7. Davros
6. Rick Berman and Brannon Braga
5. The Master
4. Darth Vader
3. Emperor Palpatine
2. Scorpius
1. Servalan

EDIT: Oops. Forgot to add one of my own.

List the Top Ten Reaons Why Archer Keeps Getting Beaten Up.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]List the Top Ten Reaons Why Archer Keeps Getting Beaten Up.

10. It's in his contract
9. At any moment, he thinks he will Leap
8.He is trying to get killed off the show
7.He forgot to eat his Wheaties
6.He is hoping for a big role in an action movie
5.He thinks he is The One
4.He loves pain
3.He has a "Kick Me" sign on his back
2.It turns him on
1.T'Pol said she would marry him if he did, but it hasn't happened yet

List the Top 10 Reasons The Man in the Top Hat is still around[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]List the Top 10 Reasons The Man in the Top Hat is still around.

10. He's the newest obsession.
9. There is no newer obsession.
8. Even if there were, it wouldn't help. (Hence John Sheridan)
7. He wears a Top Hat.
6. He's dazed.
5. He's confused.
4. He wanders around malls.
3. He's hated by many.
2. [i:post_uid0]Some[/i:post_uid0] people keep mentioning him.
1. He just won't die.

Top Ten Things To Do When 5mv Is Down.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10: He hasn't reached the Annoyance Saturation Point yet.
9: He works for the same people who hype Britney Spheres and the Gridroad Guys
8: People don't know when to let a running joke die.
7: He can't find the exit.
6: He came back. He always comes back.
5: He's delocalised over several threads.
4: He is both here and not here simultaneously.
3: It's all very quantum.
2: He's looking for some way to get rid of that stupid hat.
1: He's here just to irritate certain geological features.

Your Top Ten Favourite Top Ten Lists.

*Edit* Son of a-- I'm not typing all that again, so I'll just paste Cat's list title here and we'll continue on.

Top Ten Things To Do While 5MV Is Down.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. Finally having time for all those little things you always meant to get around to, like checking if she was really kidding about that divorce.
9. Become convinced that the site is down for good, and begin campaigning for millions in grants to recreate the great works of literature lost.
8. Attempting to measure the exact length of this particular "soon."
7. Turning in desperation to other sources of net humor, such as http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com .
6. Wearing out your browser's "Refresh" key.
5. Coming up for new ideas for ridiculous topics in the "Miscellaneous" forums.
4. Pondering the cruel, harsh nature of a reality deprived of 5MV.
3. Purchasing server space to mirror the site, to ensure that such a travesty never befalls planet Earth again.
2. Writing a BaW about the site being down.
1. Constructing an elaborate theory regarding the conspiracy between the Xindi and the Suliban to take down 5MV, rashly ignoring the conclusion of the Vulcan Science Directory that time travel is impossible.


Top Ten Ways To Get Scott Bakula to Voice-Act a Fiver:[/color:post_uid0]

[quote:post_uid0="Standback"][color=#000000:post_uid0]9. Become convinced that the site is down for good, and begin campaigning for millions in grants to recreate the great works of literature lost.[/color:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]
[color=#000000:post_uid0]Some people have the contents of the site saved on their hard drive :smile: :innocent:

I just woke up so you arn't actualy going to get any creativity out of me just now.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. Threaten him with bringing back "Quantum Leap"
9. Reveal the truth behind his role in "American Beauty"
8. Threaten him with bringing back "Quantum Leap"
7. Ask him nicely with $30000
6. Threaten him with bringing back "Quantum Leap"
5. Replace Vulcan Wine prop with real wine, then drag him into recording studio.
4. Threaten him with bringing back "Quantum Leap"
3. Tell him his "Sci-Fi Emmy" is waiting for him in Toronto, then kidnap and drag him into recording studio
2. Threaten him with bringing back "Quantum Leap"
1. Offer him lots of chilli


Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear a Trekkie (or Trekker) say[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10: Does this d'k'tagh make me look fat?
9: Who cares what warp scale they're using? Just sit back and enjoy the show.
8: No, you're right. Sisko was a better captain that Kirk or Picard.
7: Whoops, gotta go. My girlfriend's waiting.
6: I kinda liked the old Star Wars movies.

Someone else can finish this. I can't hog all the glory.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. "It's nice of you to offer me that autograph, Mr. Shatner, but if it's all the same to you I'll pass."
9. "But Kirk [i:post_uid0]was[/i:post_uid0] a jerk."
8. "Who really cares about continuity anyway?"
7. "Oh, humour and [i:post_uid0]Star Trek[/i:post_uid0] never work toghether."
6. "Kahn was a bit naff, really."
5. "Ah, heck - you're right. [i:post_uid0]Star Wars[/i:post_uid0] is better than [i:post_uid0]Trek[/i:post_uid0] any day."
4. "Boy, the Enterprise sure was ugly looking."
3. "Well, I suppose we could have a long and bitter argument about which series was better, but I think we'll just say 'each to their own' and be done with it."
2. "Actually, C/7 does make a lot of sense if you think about it..."
1. "Sorry - who's this Gene Roddenberry chap you keep mentioning?"


Name the Top Ten Reasons Why Phlox is Actually Quite Creepy

EDIT: Bah to overlapping posts I say. Bah![/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]5. "Ah, heck - you're right. Star Wars is better than Trek any day."
8. "Who really cares about continuity anyway?"

6: I kinda liked the old Star Wars movies.
9: Who cares what warp scale they're using? Just sit back and enjoy the show.

EDIT: Bah to overlapping posts I say. Bah! [/quote:post_uid0]

Overlapping thought processes as well.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. He has a tongue that could serve as a brigde from here to London.
9. He feeds tribbles to some of his pets.
8. When everybody else is asleep, he stays awake to make evil plans to take over the ship.
7. He has no problem with killing off his <s>subjects</s> patients.
6. He has three wives. I mean [i:post_uid0]come on[/i:post_uid0]!
5. He's a Cardassian spy.
4. He enjoys pain. Well, on others, but still.
3. He eats chili.
2. He's just creepy, okay?
1. Just spend a night in sickbay, you'll see.

Top Ten Things Not To Do On Enterprise.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. Dont step into Sickbay
9. Dont give Porthos cheese
8. Dont mention Klingons, Xindi, timelines...
7. Dont let Hoshi cook if you want dinner in under a week.
6. Dont tell T'Pol her catsuit could be tighter
5. Dont address Mayweather directly, it could lead to him getting his own plot.
4. Dont mention how Captain Archer looks that "guy from Quantum Leap"
3. Dont mention that Phlox died on "Six Feet Under"
2. Dont kill redshirts
1. DONT EAT THE CHILLI!


Top Ten Reasons A Pirates of the Caribean/Enterprise crossover should never be done[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. The "U.S.S. Black Pearl" just doesn't have the same ring to it.
9. Star Trek's nice enough, I suppose, but it can't really compare to something based on a Disneyland ride.
8. The whole "it only [i:post_uid0]looks[/i:post_uid0] as if we aren't dead, motionless corpses" bit has already been done to death with seven seasons of Chakotay.
7. Johnny Depp doesn't look nearly as good in a Starfleet uniform.
6. [b:post_uid0]Will Turner:[/b:post_uid0] I will fight to the finish, with my incredible skills of swordsmanship!
[b:post_uid0]Klingon Disruptor:[/b:post_uid0] **ZAP**
5. No facial hair allowed onboard early Starfleet vessels.
4. Might set Reed off about his family's long history of distinction in the Navy again.
3. Too many obvious jokes about Legolas on the Enterprise.
2. Absence of moonlight aborad starships tends to diminish the ability to demonstrate hideous curses and expensive special effects.
1. Because the Vulcan Science Directorate has concluded that time travel is impossible.


Top Ten Reasons They're Going To Do One Anyway:[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Good job Standback. I was going to do it, but I decided to leave it to a professional. I was going to say some of what you said. I love #6 :)[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0="Sa'ar Chasm"]Overlapping thought processes as well.[/quote:post_uid0]
Well, they do say that warped minds think alike.

10. It would bring in a massive (female) fan base to ENT.
9. Pirates in space sounds like a cool idea.
8. Pirate ships in space sounds like an even cooler idea.
7. Archer is running out of people to get beaten up by.
6. Keira Knightly.
5. B&B desperatly want to name an episode "The Pirates of the Delphic Expanse".
4. Reed has always wanted a cannon of his own.
3. The scriptwriters have run out of new ideas.
2. The scriptwriters have run out of old ideas.
1. Networks are ratings whores.

Name the Top Ten Reaons that Riker Kept Turning Down Promotions.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0="PointyHairedJedi"]Name the Top Ten Reaons that Riker Kept Turning Down Promotions.[/quote:post_uid0]
10. They offered him a Daedalus-class starship.
9. On other ships, first officers beat up their captains when they want to go on away missions.
8. He`s too shy to give orders to people.
7. They wanted to send him on Deep Space 9.
6. The voices told him so.
5. He and Geordi are such great friends.
4. As part of Officers Exchange Programme, he was to become the first Federation captain of a Ferengi starship.
3. He decided to wait 15 years until Mercedes manufactures its USS Titan.
2. The Vulcan Science Directorate concluded Riker accepting a promotion is impossible.
1. He followed orders from the Mysterious Future Guy.


EDIT: Oops! Silly me, :D List the Top 10 reasons why Romulans are cool.[/color:post_uid0]

[quote:post_uid0="catalina_marina"][color=#000000:post_uid0]6. He has three wives. I mean [i:post_uid0]come on[/i:post_uid0]![/color:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]
[color=#000000:post_uid0]He's not the only one.

What? NO I'm not talking about myself. I mean, only three? [i:post_uid0]Come on.[/i:post_uid0] I'm just saying that quite a few people on B5 had three wives in the course of their lives, including John Sheridan.

Seriously!

::is not going to do the Romulan one at 7AM in the morning::[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]From the Department of Redundancy Department...

[quote:post_uid0]7AM in the morning[/quote:post_uid0]

*runs away*[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]:P[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Oh, thank heavens for that. And there was me thinking that there was a whole other AM that I didn't know about.

:p[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Reasons Why Romulans Are Cool

10. Good at poisoning people [i:post_uid0]and[/i:post_uid0] at blowing stuff up
9. Only race we've actually had a decent break from for a couple of series
8. Made "Nemesis" suck, so we don't need to see any stupid TNG movies with Riker and Troi married and Data dead
7. Gave Sisko a cloaking device
6. Let every other Federation captain steal a cloaking device
5. Scored as well as Data on the "Getting Tasha Yar Into Bed" scale
4. Brilliant Romulan plot, involving replacing all Vulcans, hampering humanity's attempts at space exploration, and being really really annoying to be revealed at the end of [i:post_uid0]ENT[/i:post_uid0]'s season five
3. Only race never to be portrayed by Jeffery Combs
2. Pointy ears, but without the tired old "Illogical, Captain" schtick
1. Invented Romulan Ale

Thanks much, btw, to Opium for starting this thread, and to Neo for changing the rules - I'm really enjoying it :D
And Neo, your Archer list was great too. :) As for me, I had the fortune to see [i:post_uid0]Pirates[/i:post_uid0] for the first time exactly a week and a half ago. Hate to think what my list would've looked like if I'd written it before seeing the movie.

Top Ten Holodeck Programs:[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top 10 Holodeck Programs:

10. "A Day In The Life Of Captain Kirk": Scenario in which you go around karate-ing bad guys, flirting with the opposite sex, and reducing computers to rubble
9. Word Association. Yes, it's still around even then
8. "Whack-an-Officer": Hard day at the office? Your superiors giving you all kinds of grief? Grab a big canvas mallet and whack the daylights out of them (or rather, their holographic duplicates)!
7. SimPlanet 30000. Honorable mention goes to the up-and-coming SimEmpire
6.Solitaire. Yup, that too
5. "Causality": Scenario that is basically the opposite of the Kobayashi Maru. Romulan fleets, hordes of Klingon birds-of-prey, even Borg cubes--all are helpless before you and your powerful cruddy runabout (the eponymous "Causality"). And if the jerks cheat or get lucky, the big fat Red Button on the console will get you shipshape in a second. Often used by helm officers to relieve the tension of having had a really bad day (a la "Cause and Effect" and other boomy explodey episodes)
4. "Training Program J-20": A scenario program Lwaxana uses to keep her in shape for chasing Captain Picard. Often she focuses on working her way across a jam-packed room before Picard can see her and escape
3. "Landing" (beta testing): A scenario program used by Chakotay to practice landing shuttles. He might get some actual use out of it if he ever remembered to include a planet or [i:post_uid0]something[/i:post_uid0] to land on
2. "Disaster": One of Janeway's programs, which she uses in emergencies when she runs out of rations and needs coffee NOW. She keeps it secret from the scriptwriters for when they decide to put Voyager on short energy supply for silly purposes of drama and stuff
1. "The Three Stooges Go To Hollywood": An entertainment program that happens to be Spock's favorite. Understandably he keeps it secret from those who "wouldn't understand", meaning everyone else in general and McCoy in particular. Several redshirts who somehow got wind of it died shortly afterwards after being sent on dangerous landing parties


Next:
Top Ten Expressions that Were Cut from "Darmok"[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Expressions that Were Cut from "Darmok"

10. "Luke and Yoda at Dagobah."
9. "Saddam, his beard gray."
8. "Justin and Janet at a superbowl."
7. "Seventeen, her Baguette risen."
6. "An American, a Canadian, and a German into a bar."
5. "Osama, his plane crashed."
4. "Sa'ar, his depths hidden."
3. "Bush, his son elected."
2. "An acronym, it's meaning mysterious."
1. "Zeke, his fivers late. Always."

Top Ten Reasons Why Zeke Is Late.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Reasons Why Zeke Is Late
10. Zeke is really on another planet, so it takes time for messages to go back and forth.
9. The man in the Top Hat keeps stopping him
8. John keeps dying, which means Zeke has to clean up the scene.
7. 17 keeps losing her baguettes, so Zeke has to go out and barter for another one.
6. Zeke is really a superhero that fights crime at night
5. He is too busy watching the Superbowl halftime show
4. He is busy debating with the Vulcan Science Directorate that time travel is possible, that way he can be on time.
3. Pie, enough said
2. He is always busy making chili
1. He isn't late, we are just early according to his watch.

Next: Top 10 Product placements on Enterprise[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Woo, those two lists were really good :smile:


Top 10 Product placements on Enterprise:

10. The [b:post_uid0]Acme[/b:post_uid0] TARDIS that Daniels uses to travel around spacetime
9. [b:post_uid0]Crayola[/b:post_uid0] markers used to color the Andorians blue
8. [b:post_uid0]Motorola[/b:post_uid0] provides the functionality for all the communicators
7. [b:post_uid0]Rand McNally[/b:post_uid0] maps to avoid the nastier spatial anomalies:
Archer: Uh-oh, better steer left quick, Travis. There's supposed to be a black hole dead ahead.
Mayweather: *steers left*
Black Hole: Curses, foiled again!
Everyone except Mayweather: Whew!
6. Remember the bouncy scene in "Exile"? [b:post_uid0]Rubbermaid[/b:post_uid0] saves the day again! ;)
5. [b:post_uid0]Duracell[/b:post_uid0] batteries for the hand phasers
4. Come to think of it, [b:post_uid0]Energizer[/b:post_uid0] batteries for the transporters :p
3. The [b:post_uid0]Michelin[/b:post_uid0] nacelles on the Enterprise
2. [b:post_uid0]Kraft[/b:post_uid0] cheese for Porthos (surely you saw this one coming ;))
1. All those "anomalies"? "Weak scriptwriting"? All are merely side effects of the "warp" drive, which is actually a fully-functioning [b:post_uid0]Improbability Drive[/b:post_uid0].



Next: Top Ten Ways to Tell You're In An Alternate Universe[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. You are overwhelmed by a deep, pervading sense of irony.
8. To your vast dismay, the entire world is counting in base eight or base ten or something else bizarre.
7. Your watch is out of sync with everybody else's, clearly indicating that you are in an alternate universe where time passes at a different rate. Either that, or you should get your watch fixed.
6. You are impressed by the serious effort to keep [i:post_uid0]Enterprise[/i:post_uid0] within the established Trek timeline.
5. Everybody seems to know who you are. Also, they keep calling you "Holy Emperor."
4. All your friends seem to have become sadistic and evil. More so than usual, that is.
3. Everybody around is suddenly speaking Russian, German, or Ancient Latin.
2. You receive an e-mail from Zeke OKing your request to five [i:post_uid0]Regeneration[/i:post_uid0].
1. You do not recall llamas being mentioned in the Pledge of Allegiance in the past.

Yeah, yeah, I cheated. And so I give you:

Top Ten Ways to Cheat on the Starfleet Academy Entrance Exams:[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Top Ten Ways to Cheat on the Starfleet Academy Entrance Exams:[/quote:post_uid0]

10: Watch Coming of Age and write down the answers.
9: Ambush Wesley in the hallway and tie him up in the janitor's closet so he can't tell all the answers to the Benzite. Or just do that for the hell of it.
8: Before your holographic Runabout Piloting Exam, reprogram the holodeck to place a holographic you in the pilot's seat.
7: Look over the shoulders of other forumgoers who are currently composing their own Top Ten list on this subject and steal numbers 6-1.
6: Steal a shuttle and try to burn up in the atmosphere...no, wait, that's how to get six weeks of shuttle-repair duty.
5: Worried about the Psych Test? Two words: hallucinogenic compounds. Sure, you'll see purple screaming monkeys for three days, but they won't notice any difference in your behaviour during the test.
4: Get the purple screaming monkeys to write the test for you.
3: Learn to recognise a trick question before the commercial break. 1:1 is the only matter/antimatter ratio you can possibly have.
2: Bending the fabric of time to give yourself longer to write is generally frowned upon.

And the number one way to cheat on the Starfleet Academy Entrance Exam (shamelessly stolen from something Marc mentioned in my hearing):

1: Bribe the scriptwriter.

Top Ten Interspecies Crossbreeds We Don't Want To See (ie Human/Vulcan)[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. Changeling/Q> all powerful and evil... you do the math
9. Ferengi/Vidiian> they harvest you’re organs then sell then to the highest bidder.
8. Gorn/Bolian> a big blue dinosaur? Way too much like Barney.
7. Tribble/8472> A three legged terrible!
6. Vulcan/Klingon> Think of the mood swings!
5. Borg/Q > this one should be self explanatory!
4. Denobulan/Q > a doctor that doesn’t need a hidden camera to spy on deacon chamber.
3. Klingon/Tribble> a Klingon who is allergic to itself.
2. Cardassian/Kazon >Oh wait we did see that, I’d hate to see what he grew up to be..
1. Klingon/Frengi > he’ll try to bargain with you, and if he doesn’t get his way he’ll kill you.

Top ten things Janeway will do for a cup of coffee.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]10. She'd kiss Q. Willingly.
9. She'd let Seven go back to the Collective.
8. She'd let Chakotay die. Many times.
7. She'd eat Neelix's chilli.
6. Marry a Vidian? Sure!
5. Promote Paris to Captian Tom Paris.
4. Write and perform a POTC play, with the line, "But why is all the coffee gone?"
3. Join forces with Seska
2. She'd let the Doc get some hair.
1. She'd kill Harry Kim. Many Times.

Hehe, oh right...
"Top Ten 'Ships You Never Want To See."[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Ten Ships You Never Want To See:

10: USS [i:post_uid0]Hindentanic[/i:post_uid0]
9: USS [i:post_uid0]Sa'ar-Is-Being-Deliberately-Obtuse[/i:post_uid0]
8: The Good 'Ship [i:post_uid0]Delennier[/i:post_uid0].
7: USS [i:post_uid0]Redmond[/i:post_uid0] (Powered by Microsoft)
6: IKS [i:post_uid0]Touchy-Feely[/i:post_uid0]
5: Vulcan Science Vessel [i:post_uid0]T'Pol[/i:post_uid0] (with hull-hugging deflector shields)
4: A Galaxy-class crossed with a Borg cube crossed with a Star Destroyer crossed with the Death Star: USS [i:post_uid0]Munchkin's Dream[/i:post_uid0]
3: IKS [i:post_uid0]ch'Tolth[/i:post_uid0] (bravely-hiding-behind-a-large-styrofoam-rock-for-redshirts)
2: The Romunlan Chickenhawk-class "war"bird.
1: The USS [i:post_uid0]Jean-Luc Picard[/i:post_uid0]: To boldly get beaten up where no one has gotten beaten up before.

Top Ten Creative Misinterpretations of Forum Game Rules:[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][I'm not restricting this to Trek, btw. I've become a bit of a multi-fandom whore in the last couple of years...]

10) Janeway/Prehensile Plant
9) T'Pol/Porthos
8) Gollum/Jar Jar Binks
7) Gollum/Dobby/Dobby' sock
6) John/John clone [FS reference]
5) Data/B4
4) <strike>Data/B5</strike> Got better idea: B5/DS9. Ooh, spacestation sex!
3) Iron Man/Magneto [kudos to yesterday's Bizarro comic]
2) Chakotay/Anybody

And the number 1 'ship you never want to see is... ::drumroll::

[b:post_uid0]1) Bush/Blair[/b:post_uid0]

Well, not in public, at the very least.
Hmm.

"Top Ten Things Data Would Do With A Can of Pepsi".

Let's see if you can beat my 14-year-old self.


[b:post_uid0]Edit: GAH! No, I just spent half an hour coming up with this list and I am NOT rewriting it, so there! And besides, Sa'ar cheated :P[/b:post_uid0][/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Things Data Would Do with a Can of Pepsi.

10.) Turn it into a high-yield explosive device by jamming pop rocks into the can and launching it out a torpedo tube.
9.) Refashion the aluminum into a tiny, childlike robot named Pep, which is inevitably doomed to die.
8.) Have its gender surreptitiously changed and act like nothing's happened.
7.) Incorporate it into new warp engine modifications, which are inevitably doomed to fail.
6.) Leave it in a dark, unswept corner until it achieves sentience.
5.) Name it, when it achieves sentience.
4.) Fashion the aluminum into a memorial plaque when it inevitably dies.
3.) Pull an ill-advised practical joke on Picard by replacing his regular tea with... well, Pepsi. Spend next six months working in sewage treatment department.
2.) Set it up on a play date with a can of Coke.
1.) Drink it. Suffer catastrophic caffeine overload.

:D

Top Ten Unkind Nicknames Famous Starfleet Officers Got at the Academy[/color:post_uid0]

[quote:post_uid0="Standback"][color=#000000:post_uid0]10. You are overwhelmed by a deep, pervading sense of irony.
8. To your vast dismay, the entire world is counting in base eight or base ten or something else bizarre.[/color:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]
[color=#000000:post_uid0]He's counting in base nine! Help, I'm in an alternate universe![/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Unkind Nicknames yadda yadda.

10: Cadet Geordi LaForge: Titanic, following an unfortunate incident with the Academy Swim Team.
9: Cadet Data: Waterwing, following the aforementioned unfortunate incident.
8: Cadet Kathryn Janeway: Javaway.
7: Cadet Julian Bashir: Casasupernova, after his every attempt to ask out female cadets exploded spectacularly.
6: Cadet Benjamin Lafayette Sisko: Afroman, after his hairstyle. Suspected of causing latent mental trauma which manifested itself later in life around the end of Season 4.
5: Cadet Worf: Black Widower, after every one of his girlfriends ended up in sickbay with broken bones and a restraining order.
4: Cadet Chakotay: The Spruce Goose, for obvious reasons.
3: Cadet Christopher Pike: No nickname, but voted Most Likely To Be Suceeded.
2: Cadet Spock: Again, no nickname, mostly because anyone who tried to give him one woke up with a stiff neck and no pants.
1: Cadet Uhura: Odysseus, in a cruel and rather obscure mockery of her lack of a first name.

Remind me not to do this thread when I'm tired and uncreative.

Top Ten Signs You're Ripping Off Someone Else's Top Ten List:[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Signs You're Ripping Off Someone Else's Top Ten List:

10. You forget to remove their name from the list
9. You admit to it
8. The subject is "Top ten signs your girlfriend is actually a __"
7. The list is in a language you can't even understand
6. You've got a piece of paper you tore in half in your hands
5. You dedicate the list to "those wonderful keys: Ctrl, C, and V"
4. ...and then you actually have the same exact entry, word-for-word, at the same exact rank, as another Top 10 List--even if it doesn't make any sense
3. Everybody around is suddenly speaking Russian, German, or Ancient Latin.
2. David Letterman is threatening to sue you for plagiarism
1. Two words: "Two words:"


Heh, that went rather fast. :)


Next: Top Ten Orders Picard Always Secretly Wanted to Give[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Top Ten Orders Picard Always Secretly Wanted to Give

10.) Everyone should get drunk and play pingpong.
9.) Casual Friday is now pants-optional.
8.) All fencing partners get half a cardboard tube instead of a foil.
7.) Hair is now against regulations.
6.) There are four lights.
5.) The child-free zone now includes the entire ship.
4.) Gowron can kiss his @$$.
3.) The Mintakans should not only worship him, but build big statues of his head.
2.) Synonyms are still legal. Listing them is not.
1.) Any asking about the accent will result in immediate ejection into space. Naked.

Top Ten Rejected Federation Ship Designs.[/color:post_uid0]