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-   -   Fun with Google II - Attack of the Fish (http://www.fiveminute.net/forums/showthread.php?t=265)

Celeste 06-13-2003 06:53 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]My god people. How do you understand each other over there? I mean the US has accents but at least they're able to be understood!

(And yes the Boyfriend is from Northern Ireland so sometimes it's hard to understand him too :p)[/color:post_uid0]

PointyHairedJedi 06-13-2003 07:02 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I can do a passable Irish accent too. Dunno if it's anything to do with the fact that my grandfater was Irish.

EDIT: I should probably mention the Stoke accent too. It's pretty horrible. Which is not good considering I live here (in Stoke that is).[/color:post_uid0]


Celeste 06-13-2003 07:36 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Accents are fun. The Irish don't pronounce Ts, and I don't pronounce Rs at the end of words. So if you put those two accents together my name is Hea-huh. :bigsmile:[/color:post_uid0]

Saxamaphone 06-13-2003 08:58 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Me bestest one iz da ali g translata. E iz so snoop.[/color:post_uid0]

Sa'ar Chasm 06-13-2003 08:58 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]My own accent is a Canadian non-accent template with a dash of Australian for flavouring, with strong traces of Mumble.[/color:post_uid0]

Saxamaphone 06-13-2003 09:04 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Mine is, different. I used to have an accent, and partial speech impediment - it made be sound like if Elmer Fudd was from Boston. Which is interesting, only because my dad was from Arkansas and my mom was from Wisconsin, and I lived in Florida. I think it's mellowed out into something normal, I guess it's technically midwestern - (like you here on the news).[/color:post_uid0]

PointyHairedJedi 06-13-2003 09:06 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Me bestest one iz da ali g translata. E iz so snoop.[/quote:post_uid0]

And now you must die.[/color:post_uid0]


mudshark 06-13-2003 09:46 PM

[quote:post_uid0="NAHTMMM"][color=#000000:post_uid0]... the "Geordie" dialect, whatever that is ...[/color:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]
[color=#000000:post_uid0]For examples of Geordie dialect, check out [i:post_uid0]Touching Evil[/i:post_uid0] on PBS's [i:post_uid0]Mystery![/i:post_uid0] -- the show is set in the Newcastle/Durham area. It also happens to be a very good show (and I've made it a point to avoid cop shows for many years, now.)[/color:post_uid0]

taya17 06-14-2003 12:44 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]My accent varies. I'm Singaporean so I do have a little of the local slang (which we dub "singlish") but I have been told on repeated occasions that I sound like a foreigner (by this i assume they mean "American".)

I've been trying to disprove the fact that I don't have an American accent, and my English, in fact, is perfect, accentless Queen's English.

But it doesn't work.[/color:post_uid0]

AKAArzosah 06-26-2003 06:38 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Did anyone try translating the intro?

For those of you, that are new, this is good, as this functions. Someone uses itself an on-line translation service such as Google or Alta Vista Babelfish "translate" a promising section more fiver of the English at a language and at a back differently. Perhaps you repeat mehrer marks, if the results are not enough goofy. Then those divide the attention appreciate results here also. And we laugh at the translations pathetic.[/color:post_uid0]

AKAArzosah 06-26-2003 06:52 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Or this, from Ouroborus (Andromeda, well duh! )

Harper: What's the prognosis?
Trance: Not great. Even after the change it's a pretty weak season for my character.
Harper: I meant MY prognosis.
Trance: Oh, you're still dying. Just faster now.
Tyr: That's what I like to hear.
Dylan: Shut up, Tyr. We need to take action. Only one race can save Harper now....
Beka: But sir, we promised the captain we wouldn't contact the Vidiians!
Dylan: I was alluding to the Perseids.
Beka: Oh. They're okay too, I guess.
Dylan's Log: We're at the Perseid homeworld already. We're just that cool.



In order to seize: Which thing is the forecast?
Trance: Not in great part. * also after it in order to modify it this graceful weak person, for being you for my letter.
In order to seize: I have meant the forecast of CMon.
Trance: The OH -, still you die. Just more quickly hour.
Tyr: It is that I can be felt.
Dylan: Arrests the labbro, Tyr. We must prepare the measures. Only one run can hour to store Harper....,
Beka: But Dear Sir, we have promised to the captain that with Vidiians in the relationship!
Dylan: I have I report Perseids.
Beka: The OH -. you are moreover, me approval of appraisal. You transport the edge of the equipment of
Dylans: We are already homeworld in Perseid. We are of right that coldly.[/color:post_uid0]

NAHTMMM 07-23-2003 03:08 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]^Heheheheh. :smile:

I have come across a link to what must be the six-shooter of all twisting translators :D.


So I have finally turned my attention to that recent smash hit, "All Good Things..."; highlights follow.

[quote:post_uid0]Picard: Computer, what day is it?
Computer: The first day of the rest of your life.
Picard: GRRRRR....
Troi: It's Stardate 47988, Captain.
Picard: Thank you, Counsellor. At last your genius for stating the obvious has come in useful.[/quote:post_uid0]
becomes
[quote:post_uid0]Picardy: It is the calculation, the day it?
Calculation: The first day of the rest of its life.
Picardy: GRRRRR....
Troi: IT IS GIVEN 47988, [b:post_uid0]Capitaine of the star.[/b:post_uid0]
Picardy: Thankses, councilman. [b:post_uid0]Finally its genius came, to the obvious one to indicate in the profit.[/b:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]



And
[quote:post_uid0]Future La Forge: Hi, non-Captain! How's the vineyard?
Picard: Geordi, your VISOR! What happened to it?
Future La Forge: That little girl finally wanted her barrette back, remember?
Picard: Yes... yes, of course. It's all coming back now. I'm readjusting to this time --[/quote:post_uid0]
becomes, after French and German, the hilariously incomprehensible
[quote:post_uid0]Future [b:post_uid0]millmill mill of[/b:post_uid0]: Hello, NichtKapitaen! how go the vine?
Picardy: Geordi, your [b:post_uid0]avoidance sun! What arrived in it?[/b:post_uid0]
Future millmill mill of: [b:post_uid0]Did this small girl wish it back the staff[/b:post_uid0], finally remembers?
Picardy: ..., naturally. It decreases/goes back now. I adjust this time after --[/quote:post_uid0]
"LaForge" -> "millmill mill". I don't think I need to say any more than that. :lol:^googol
But after he becomes the "Rolling-mill of the millmill of", it gets even sillier:
[quote:post_uid0]future [b:post_uid0]Balance-mill of millmill of[/b:post_uid0]: Hello, NichtKapitaen! how goes the screw?
Picardy: Geordi, [b:post_uid0]its sun to come up! That thing arrived inside?[/b:post_uid0]
future Balance-mill of millmill of: This small girl has augured behind the team of employees, remembers finally of?
Picardy: ..., of course. [b:post_uid0]Sustenations[/b:post_uid0] of the hour of Decreases/goes. Registry after this time --[/quote:post_uid0]



My favorite of the translations of this passage
[quote:post_uid0]Picard: Ah yes. My apologies; I've not yet mastered the difference between my manly girl and my girly man.
Past Worf: That is entirely understandaHEYYY![/quote:post_uid0]
is probably this one:
[quote:post_uid0]Picardy: Ampèreheure. My excuses; I come however directed the difference my son who does not turn them and extracts girly inside the man here.
After Worf: He is understandaHEYYY finishes![/quote:post_uid0]
:D :D[/color:post_uid0]

catalina_marina 07-23-2003 10:59 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Neelix: Oo! Oo! Can I come on the away mission?
Chakotay: Fine, as long as you don't foolishly run off and get attacked by mysterious aliens.
Neelix: That sounds like fun![/quote:post_uid0]
becomes
[quote:post_uid0]Neelix: Oo! Oo! I can come in the mission of the left?
Chakotay: Very good it has taste of much stay, since then of which worked stupid and apanha the attacato does not give mysterious foreigners.
Neelix: This is similar the recovery![/quote:post_uid0]
I have absolutely no idea what Chakotay is saying. You're right, this [i:post_uid0]is[/i:post_uid0] fun. :D[/color:post_uid0]

AKAArzosah 07-24-2003 10:19 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]TRANSLATED THIS:

Hello, my name is Lisa, and I am going to Babelize this piece of writing to see what happens. Part of a fiver follows.

Dylan: I'll improve morale by making an average crewman feel better. Watch.
Average Crewman: I'm sorry about our pathetic showing, sir.
Dylan: Not to worry. It's your effort, and your meaningless death later on, that count.
Average Crewman: Wow -- I feel great now! Thanks!

And another part:

Dylan: Report!
Crewman: It's not looking good, sir. We've lost shields, our weapons are gone....
Dylan: Perhaps today is a good day to die! Prepare for ramming speed!
Crewman: Sir, there's another starship coming in...it's the Enterprise!
Dylan: You mean Picard's huge engine of butt-kicking?
Crewman: Um...no, Archer's weak-kneed dinghy of suckitude.
Dylan: Gee, that'll help us out. Abandon ship!

Now to Babelize.



TRANSLATED TO:

Hello, it is my inner name and SMOOTH in Babelize of this part to
consider of the description that what introduces. One has gone away of
a celebrity of Cinque-Libbra follows.

Dylan: I improve the moral when it emits shutdowns the other way around, the end to believe to the
average member of the square more better possible. It appears.
[b:post_uid0] Member of square means: [/b:post_uid0] They are sad in our aspect of pathetisches,
getlteman.
Dylan: Not same ciao I. It is later his inoperative effort and its women without the meaning, this one who count.
Member of square means: [b:post_uid0] Defective the healthful rent -- [/b:post_uid0] odore on the hour of most! Indebted!

And one another portion:

Dylan: Report/ratio!
Member of the square: It does not look like good, getlteman. [b:post_uid0] We have ourselves lost we described, our groups that we were.... [/b:post_uid0]
Dylan: [b:post_uid0] It is possibly today a day of good for dying! With the speed of the point he is prepared lower! [/b:post_uid0]
Member of the square: The expensive horseman, gives it that a other starship, where enters..., is he he company!
Dylan: They would wish to say that the enormous machine of Picardy of colleg- of the foot is burned totally?
Member of the square: Not of that she is IN EXCESS..., [b:post_uid0]the weak person kneed suckitude of contattori of the elbow of the boat. [/b:post_uid0]
Dylan: Gee, this ' ll repairs them. Boat to give inside ignition!

Taken to traverse in Babelize.[/color:post_uid0]


NAHTMMM 07-24-2003 01:28 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]:lol: :lol:

women = death? :O Where did [i:post_uid0]that[/i:post_uid0] come from?

[quote:post_uid0]They would wish to say that the enormous machine of Picardy of colleg- of the foot is burned totally?[/quote:post_uid0]
I find it kinda spooky that this, while managing to completely mangle the original meaning, still manages to be grammatically correct (other than cutting "college" off). I'm not used to seeing that. ;)[/color:post_uid0]

NAHTMMM 08-25-2003 07:35 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]This scene from SCMoll's "The Five Doctors" was too good to pass up.

[quote:post_uid0]Second Doctor: Hello, Brigadier! How are you doing?
Brigadier: Fine until you showed up.
Second Doctor: Never mind that, look! A big CGI-whirly cone thingy! Run!
Brigadier: These are updated special effects, right?
Second Doctor: Yes, why? We didn't have CGI in the Seventies. We're in the Special Edition!
Brigadier: Because if that's the updated special effect, I shudder to imagine the look of the original.[/quote:post_uid0]

After "translating" to Spanish and back:
[quote:post_uid0]Second Doctor: Hello, Brigadier general! How you are doing?
Brigadier general: Fine until you demonstrated for above.
[b:post_uid0]Second Doctor: He never matters of that, watch! A great cone of CGI-whirly thingy! Operation![/b:post_uid0]
Brigadier general: These are updated special effects, the right?
Second Doctor: Yes, why? We did not have cgi in years 70. We are in the special edition!
Brigadier general: Because if that one is the updated special effect, estremezo to imagine the glance to me of the original one.[/quote:post_uid0]

Or, after passing through German and French:
[quote:post_uid0]Second doctor: Hallo, Sergeant! How do you make?
Sergeant: Amend, until you represent in top.
Second doctor: [b:post_uid0]If you never worry about that, to look at! Large CGI-whirly cone thingy![/b:post_uid0] Race!
Sergeant: Those are updated special effects, right?
Second doctor: why? We did not have cgi in the seventy. [b:post_uid0]We are in the non-recurring expense![/b:post_uid0]
Sergeant: Because, if the updated special effect is, me shudder, to present the view of the presentation.[/quote:post_uid0][/color:post_uid0]

taya17 08-26-2003 01:00 AM

[quote:post_uid0="catalina_marina"][color=#000000:post_uid0]I have absolutely no idea what Chakotay is saying.[/color:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]
[color=#000000:post_uid0]It's the standard Chakotay rubbish that he usually spills. Ignore :D[/color:post_uid0]

NAHTMMM 09-04-2003 03:57 PM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]From the new LOTR TJI:

[quote:post_uid0]This is the first major announcement New Line has made since acquiring the services of Tartarus Consulting, a Cleveland-based company with a long history in the field. The company was behind such popular campaigns as the "Wazzaaaaaap" commercials and the death sports craze. Tartarus also capitalized on the popularity of Choose Your Own Adventure books to market a series called Write Your Own "I am the Walrus"-Era Beatles Song, in which each customer was provided with a dictionary and six pints of vodka.[/quote:post_uid0]

becomes, after being translated to Chinese and back,

[quote:post_uid0]This was the new new line does from gained the Tartarus service consultation the first main announcement, based on Cleaveland's company by a glorious history in domain. [b:post_uid0]The company looks like "Wazzaaaaaap the" commerce[/b:post_uid0] and [b:post_uid0]the death sports goes crazy[/b:post_uid0] is after the so universal campaign. Tartarus and [b:post_uid0]used the popularity to choose you risk book sale series to call to write you "me is Walrus" the time Beatles song[/b:post_uid0], each customer had the dictionary and six pints vodkas.[/quote:post_uid0]

Or, mangled via Japanese instead,

[quote:post_uid0][b:post_uid0]This Cleveland of the history[/b:post_uid0] where the first principal announcement field which since acquiring the service of Tartarus which new line character consults was made is long is the company which it has made be based. [b:post_uid0]As for the company the commercial "of Wazzaaaaaap" and [i:post_uid0]sport of death penetration[/i:post_uid0] come out seem the way in rear of the campaign which spreads,[/b:post_uid0] it was. The song of Beatles "of the Walrus times when and as for Tartarus [b:post_uid0]which has been written the book of your yourself venture in capital letter choose your monopolized ones which are written in order to sell the series which is called[/b:post_uid0] and with popularity I each customer the dictionary of the vodka and can give 6 pints".[/quote:post_uid0]
Call me stupid, but I don't recall any Beatles tunes with titles anywhere near as long as that. "Hey Jude" doesn't even come close. ;)[/color:post_uid0]

taya17 09-05-2003 01:53 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I guess this explains why manuals for Chinese and Japanese electronic products make no sense whatsoever :D[/color:post_uid0]

Opium 10-20-2003 08:46 AM

[color=#000000:post_uid0]From "Impulse"
<quote>
T'Pol: There, my part of the repair watermelon is done. Mr. Reed, how are -- AAAG!
Reed: What's wrong? Did I not shoot the console enough times?
T'Pol: You FOOL! You incompetent pitchfork! Must I intersect everything yourself?
Archer: Um... maybe you should calm down a bit.
T'Pol: No! You're just gleaming to shut me upsilon! You've always evaporated Vulcans, right from the start! Sweet holy SURAK, I need a fruit pie!
Archer: Okay, I don't want to shoot you, but I grill. Arrgh, now you've got me doing it.
<quote>

to:

<quote>
You Pol.: Â There, my part of watermelon of repair took place. Â Mr Reed, as you are -- AAAG! Â
Schilf: Â What false? Â Didn't I germinate the console sufficient marks? Â
You Pol.: Â It TROMP! Â It inefficient pitchfork! Â do I have to cut all? Â
Archer: Â More... perhaps that you should calm to the bottom a top. Â
You Pol.: Â Not! Â They are to shine right aiming to close to me upsilon! Â They always evaporated from the very start of Vulcans, right! Â * soft saint SURAK, to require I Fruchtpie-Chart! Â
Archer: Â I would not like to germinate O.K., you, however me cricket. Â Of Arrgh now, have making him you I.
<quote>

and

Reed: Charge!
Zombies: BRAAAAAINS!
T'Pol: Take that! And that! And that!
Archer: T'Pol, we killed that zombie two minutes ago. You can stop kicking it in the crotch any time now.
T'Pol: Ex-boyfriend.

to

Stick: It charges!
Zombies: BRAAAAAINS!
T ' pole: It takes this one! And this one! And this one! Archer: We killed T ' pole, that Zombie two before minuteren. They can stop the hour dargli football in the junction constantly.
T ' pole: Old old friend.[/color:post_uid0]



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