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-   -   How would you protect your planet? (http://www.fiveminute.net/forums/showthread.php?t=478)

Vedra 08-06-2004 05:57 PM

How would you protect your planet?
 
Pretend you're one of those silly,over-the-top TNG villians. How would you protect your planet that you're hiding on?

I'd have a phaser strip that goes all the way around the planet in orbit,and it can blow up large asteroids or very small planetoids,and if they managed to get down to the planet,I'd have floors that secrete glue so I can trap them and tell them my evil plan....and then be defeated,but not killed,just taught a nice morality lesson,as is Picard's way.

Ginga 08-06-2004 06:11 PM

An army of mericiless, acidic cheese-flinging, phaser rifle-toting ROBOTS! ...KITTY ROBOTS!

*gasp* *points to sig* And the robots would look like THAT kitty! And they'd EAT people who called 'em gerbils! Then they'd all say the Zeeky words and DESTROY THE WORLD! BWHAHAH!

...oh... we're trying to PROTECT the planet? Ohhh...

Okay, so the sig kitty robots won't say the Zeeky words, but they will eat people, have giant phaser rifles, and they will fling acidic cheese.

And that's how I'd protect my planet. ^_^

PointyHairedJedi 08-06-2004 07:04 PM

I would make many, many Zeke clones. By the time the annoying do-gooding heros managed to get past them (and that's a good couple of years I reckon), I'd have more clones waiting for them, only this time of 17. And they'd all be wearing nametags that said "taya".

:D

catalina_marina 08-06-2004 09:32 PM

^And you think they'll be on your side? And if so, for how long? :D

PointyHairedJedi 08-06-2004 09:48 PM

Oh, they'd have to be conditioned of course. As far as such a thing would be possible at any rate.

I did think about having millions of cat clones to roll their eyes at any intruders (sure to stop most of them in their tracks), but the thought of there being more than one Evil Dutch Woman scares me greatly.

catalina_marina 08-06-2004 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PointyHairedJedi
but the thought of their being more than one Evil Dutch Woman scares me greatly.

My work here is done.

And no, that doesn't mean I go away now. :roll:

NAHTMMM 08-06-2004 11:27 PM

I would use my Evilly Ouchy Math powers to turn any invaders into nice useful or decorative things, like lawn chairs or apartments for the homeless or perhaps begonias. Maybe even a few shrubberies.

Sa'ar Chasm 08-07-2004 01:28 AM

I'd rename it "Canada" and sleep secure in the knowledge that nobody would ever find it.

Opium 08-07-2004 01:46 AM

Quote:

I'd rename it "Canada" and sleep secure in the knowledge that nobody would ever find it.
Canada IS a really sweet country! Grr!

So, yes, while I would call my planet "Canada" and live a relativly peaceful, educational, peace-keeping life, in the case the the Cardissians framed us for some grevous misdeed...
My plan to defend my planet: An army of John and TopHatMan clones, that regenerate and never die. And all of them would wear tophats that were actually weapons.

But before we got to that point, we would have charmed and helped the Federation so much that they will have us join, because we are really good peacekeepers. Then Canadians would be sent to disfuse bad situations, or clean up after the Federation made a mess of things. :D

NAHTMMM 08-07-2004 04:18 AM

That isn't very over-the-top-villainish ;)

NeoMatrix 08-07-2004 04:32 AM

I would have a whole planet of cloned Agent Smiths, lol

Hotaru 08-07-2004 04:36 AM

I would create a species that can only be found on my planet. Then when anyone attacks, the federation would be there to preserve it. I think that would be very good. Nobody would ever be able to attack me, I would just hold up one of the creatures (that would no doubt be cute) and the federation would come save me! Yay for cute unique species!

Ginga 08-07-2004 04:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hotaru
I would create a species that can only be found on my planet. Then when anyone attacks, the federation would be there to preserve it. I think that would be very good. Nobody would ever be able to attack me, I would just hold up one of the creatures (that would no doubt be cute) and the federation would come save me! Yay for cute unique species!

No army of black mages? :(

Opium 08-07-2004 05:39 AM

Quote:

That isn't very over-the-top-villainish
I'm Canadian! Of course it isnt! :wink:
Or are we... :?:

catalina_marina 08-07-2004 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Opium
in the case the the Cardissians framed us for some grevous misdeed...

Or South Park. :wink:

PointyHairedJedi 08-07-2004 12:34 PM

...With their beady little eyes, and flapping heads so full of lies...

I think Bill Gates should die in films more often. :D

taya17 08-08-2004 02:56 PM

Protect my planet? I wouldn't have to. My home planet would be the stuff of myth, of dread, a sacred place where none would dare to walk. It would haunt the darkest, deepest nightmares of even the brave. The mere whisper of its name would strike fear into the hearts of people.

I wouldn't need to protect it. No-one in his or her right frame of mind would ever dream of approaching it.

Ginga 08-08-2004 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taya17
Protect my planet? I wouldn't have to. My home planet would be the stuff of myth, of dread, a sacred place where none would dare to walk. It would haunt the darkest, deepest nightmares of even the brave. The mere whisper of its name would strike fear into the hearts of people.

I wouldn't need to protect it. No-one in his or her right frame of mind would ever dream of approaching it.

*looks around*

*sneaks a poke at 17's planet*

*giggles madly and runs away*

NAHTMMM 08-08-2004 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taya17
I wouldn't need to protect it. No-one in his or her right frame of mind would ever dream of approaching it.

And so naturally you'd find either the Enterprise, Voyager, or some bunch of dumb children who dared each other to spend a night in the "spooky planet" on your doorstep before more than a few centuries had passed...

Hotaru 08-09-2004 11:36 PM

Quote:

No army of black mages?
The cute species has innate black mage abilities. They look cute, then they burn you with fire that has appeared out of nowhere!

I feel this sudden urge to start exploring 17's planet. hm.

*Get's out patheticly weak black mage cotton robe*

*transports down to planet*

*runs in circles screaming*


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