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5MV's Statement of Purpose

by Zeke

(Note to readers: This was one of the very first elements of Five-Minute Voyager, appearing on the front page of 5MV's embryonic June 2000 version. It's the only body of text on the site I've never changed in all that time. -Z)
Ah, the marvels of modern society! And perhaps the greatest of these marvels is speed. The space shuttle orbits the Earth at Mach 25. Passenger airplanes break the sound barrier. Burritos take a mere sixty seconds to cook. Our society has no time for slowpokes; to make a difference, you've got to live life in the fast lane.

But in the middle of all this speed, we find the one thing that refuses to increase its snail-like pace: television. To enjoy an ordinary TV show, you must spend a full hour on the couch doing nothing. In that same amount of time, the space shuttle orbits the Earth hundreds of times, Concordes outrace the sound of their own engines, and someone, somewhere, is cooking sixty burritos one after another. Imagine what you could do with that kind of time!

What's needed is a revolution, and the perfect show to begin it is Star Trek: Voyager. This site is a site with a mission: to begin the acceleration of TV by shortening Voyager episodes to one-twelfth of their original length. Everything about the original episode is retained, but the new, streamlined version takes a mere five minutes instead of sixty. You, the reader, stand at the forefront of the speed revolution. Welcome to the future. Welcome to Five-Minute Star Trek: Voyager!

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All material © 2000, Colin Hayman.